October 9, 2006

JB wasn’t particularly excited by the prospect of visiting a pumpkin farm this weekend. “We can get pumpkins at QFC,” he said. “If you want a photo, we can just put Riley in front of the produce section.”

“You are the Grinch of Halloween,” I told him. “Come on, this farm has hay rides.”

They also had tractor rides.

And really big pumpkins.

Really, really big pumpkins.

Seriously fucking big-ass pumpkins.

Which we liberated with clippers.

So. Many. Pumpkins!

But best of all, this farm also had – oh, you’d better sit down for this one –


Which they used to launch a watermelon (why a watermelon and not a pumpkin, I do not know) about a football field’s length.

And solicited the day’s first non-Maddox-Jolie/I-will-burn-you-with-my-eye-lasers expression from Riley. (“HOLY CRAP!”)

I can’t adequately describe the sheer awesomeness a trebuchet adds to a pumpkin farm. In fact, I think every wholesome family activity that you secretly (or in JB’s case, not-so-secretly) think is going to be lame should include a trebuchet. Easter egg hunt? Trebuchet. Playgroup get-together? Trebuchet. Sunday morning church outing? Fucking TREBUCHET, man (I can even think of a new hymn for the occasion, it’s called “Jesus, Pull Your Trebuchet of Faith For Me”).

Also, had I known about the trebuchet selling point, I seriously would not have bothered with that shit about hay rides.


36 Responses to “Pull my trebuchet”

  1. Bridget on October 9th, 2006 11:18 am

    Was Riley at all scared of the big pumpkins? We recently went to the patch also and my son was terrified! Check out the pics if you’re interested at http://letters2jack.blogspot.com/. Look for the Great Pumpkin entry.

    That Trebochet DOES look pretty awesome. Nothing like that at the farm we went to… :(

  2. Jessie on October 9th, 2006 11:25 am

    That looks like a fun day! Good for you for getting JB to go – he probably would have kicked himself if he had not gone and found out about the trebochet afterwards, because seriously. That is awesome.

  3. Swistle on October 9th, 2006 11:26 am

    I think a trebuchet would be particularly awesome at a wedding. As the bride and groom depart, the guests could load the trebuchet with rice–and sock the bride and groom with it as they merge onto the highway.

  4. sundry on October 9th, 2006 11:31 am

    No, he just had his normal “I AM SUSPICIOUS OF ALL I SURVEY” look, he didn’t seem scared. But then again, he was in the backpack pretty much the whole time, it only occured to us LATER that we could have taken him out among the pumpkins.

  5. janet on October 9th, 2006 11:51 am

    And I always just thought Trebuchet was a font. Where can I get one of those things out here on the east coast?

  6. Fab on October 9th, 2006 12:03 pm

    Ok….that photo of Riley is too funny….Watermelon tossing would do that to me as well.

  7. Jenny J. on October 9th, 2006 12:13 pm

    Man! You would think that non font trebuchet would be front and fucking center on their website, but it isn’t.

  8. Sonia (DDM) on October 9th, 2006 12:58 pm

    Awesome. I’ve been to that farm. The trebuchet does rock.

  9. claire on October 9th, 2006 12:59 pm

    I don’t think i have ever seen the word ‘trebuchet’ so many times in one place before. Ever.

    That is the coolest thing in the world, however. How awesome. All other pumpkin picking weekends have now become seriously lame in comparison.

  10. orangepeacock on October 9th, 2006 1:10 pm

    I love Riley’s “HOLY CRAP” expression. *He* knows what’s cool. Also, you think those are big pumpkins? No way! Every year at the farm market down the road from my childhood home, they truck in the biggest pumpkin any farmer in the area has grown. Then you can pay a few cents to guess the weight and put it in a jar, and whoever gets closest the day before Halloween gets to truck that baby home. We’re talking, like, pumpkins that weigh as much as me and are larger than my coffee table. Some serious pumpkinage.

    And I just noticed the “comment preview” thingy. I hope that hasn’t been there since I started reading, because I’d feel dumb. It’s cool!

  11. telegirl on October 9th, 2006 1:12 pm

    Do I dare suggest http://trebuchet.com/kit/tabletop/ ?

    You could use it to torture Cat. I just say that because mine just spontaneously started meowing away and she’s in the next room… by herself! Why are cats such freaks?!

    Anyway, it’d be fun for the whole family!! Er, putting it together, I mean. Not torturing Cat. :o)

  12. Melissa on October 9th, 2006 2:00 pm

    I am seriously dying here from the expressions on Riley’s face in the one with the big-ass pumpkin and the one with you and the clippers. The way he leans around both of you to get a better look at what you’re holding. I could sit for hours and caption these pictures. Also? I could eat him alive, he’s so adorable.

  13. jonniker on October 9th, 2006 2:29 pm

    I too, am completely and hilariously enthralled with Riley’s suspect features. “What…what the hell IS that thing? It’s orange…and BIG and…WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF SHIT ARE YOU TRYING TO PULL, MAN?”

    Secondly, is JB always hot? It’s just that in every photo it seems crisp and cool – you’re in a vest, Riley’s in long pants – and JB always seems dressed for infinitely warmer climes, no matter what the season.

  14. Mona on October 9th, 2006 2:44 pm

    I’m sold on a trebuchet. Too. Fucking. Cool. I’m there!

  15. sundry on October 9th, 2006 2:44 pm

    Jonniker: JB, I’m sure, would like everyone to know that he is in fact always hot. Heh.

  16. angela on October 9th, 2006 2:55 pm

    i though trebuchet was a font…? i need a dictionary, apparently.

  17. Pete on October 9th, 2006 4:23 pm

    You want some kick ass Pumpkin Chunkin check this out.

    They have developed a special white pumpkin for their contest. Seem the ‘normal’ pumpkin will break apart. I don’t remember which channel did a special on this but some of those air cannons will shoot a pumpkin into the next county. I would go to a lame pumpkin farm if they launched pumpkins (or a 450 lb upright piano, http://www.eskimo.com/~verne/treb.htm)
    Mmm big pumpkin guns

  18. warcrygirl on October 9th, 2006 5:49 pm

    That so fucking rocks. The main attraction at our local pumpkin farm (besides the pumpkins) is a mule that bites. Yay. Looks like Riley may grow up to be the next Adam Savage (of Mythbusters fame).

  19. katie d on October 9th, 2006 7:37 pm

    Funny entry, great Riley pictures, awesomre trebuchet, and I have to second this being the most times I have ever seen the word “trebuchet” in one place. However, that picture of the pumpkins all in a row? FUCKING ROCKS. Seriously, THAT is a kickass killer picture. I am jealous at your photographic skills. Jealous!

  20. lena on October 9th, 2006 8:06 pm

    So jealous! We pick our pumpkin at some contrived haystack by the gas station. Harvest time indeed.

    LOVE that pic of you and Riley, btw.

  21. Lil Liberal on October 9th, 2006 8:15 pm

    Yowza, great pictures. The pumpkin farm with that overcast sky is surreal. :) I’m jealous of the trebuchet- those things are cool.

  22. Kristin on October 9th, 2006 8:25 pm

    Good god, Riley could trademark that expression and I would buy it when I’m feeling particularly crotchety because it’s that insanely cute.

    Also, I want a trebuchet, to aim at someone who is currently drooling on a pillow upstairs and is too large to fit in a crib. Heh.

  23. Joolie on October 9th, 2006 8:49 pm

    Maybe JB would have been more enthusiastic if you’d have more to sell than hay rides, but I think a surprise trebuchet is much cooler than a planned trebuchet. How often do you just stumble upon a trebuchet?

  24. Annie on October 9th, 2006 9:33 pm

    Excuse me, it’s Maddox Jolie-Pitt. Sheesh.

  25. Donna on October 9th, 2006 11:13 pm

    Maddox always does seem pissed off huh?
    And how do you pronounce that? Treybookay? Treybooshay? Trebucket? Somehow in my head I knew what it was but I swear I don’t know how I knew, because it’s not something that you see everyday and I don’t think I’ve ever heard the word or even seen it written.

  26. jac on October 10th, 2006 3:31 am

    I come for the pumpkins, I stay for the trebuchet.
    And Jesus pulls that Trebuchet of Faith like a natural.

  27. ali on October 10th, 2006 6:58 am

    and here i thought a trebuchet was just a font… ;)

  28. Paula on October 10th, 2006 7:36 am

    One of the fall events at our local fairgrounds includes a “Pumpkin Chuckin'” contest. Some of the area high schools compete — the teams (can you letter in that, I wonder?) bring their own trebuchets which have been tweaked during the off season depending on last year’s standings. (And no, I don’t live in some backwater town without indoor plumbing!)

  29. Mel on October 10th, 2006 7:59 am

    My husband’s work has a pumpkin launching contest every year. Several teams build their own trebuchets and launch the pumpkins. It’s pretty fun to watch. *grin*

  30. Alley on October 10th, 2006 8:31 am

    We’ve got “World Championship Punkin Chunkin'” here in Delaware. I’ve never been, but we’re going this year since I’ve recently learned that they have pumpkin funnel cake at the event. Yes, I have priorities, why do you ask?

  31. Brooke on October 10th, 2006 8:40 am

    Our pumpkin farm has a corn gun (using compressed air) and a tomato slingshot. Those are hella-fun, but I’m thinking a trebuchet would be more fun…

  32. ADM on October 10th, 2006 10:25 am

    Too Funny! Riley looks just like JB in those first few pictures – normally I see both of you in him, but sorry, he is just mini-JB there! And love the Holy Crap face. awesome.

    And why watermelons, you ask? perhaps this logic is tainted by living in the northeast, but aren’t watermelons going out of season, aka rotting, while pumpkins are cash-money this time of year? I’d launch rotting fruit over hard dollars too!

  33. sweetney on October 10th, 2006 12:51 pm

    okay, i’m seriously fuckin’ jealous over the trebuchet. i mean, what in the world is better than fruit and vegetable matter being flung great distances TO ITS DOOM? NOTHING!

  34. Marilyn on November 18th, 2006 12:15 pm

    Maybe you could suggest to JB that the next time he wants to go hunting, you could just snap his photo in front of a mounted elk head somewhere…

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