August 23, 2007

Continued from yesterday’s post . . .

I want to know why we haven’t seen any belly pics like we did with the Boy.?!  — Stephanie

Because I am so totally lying about all this pregnancy stuff! Dude, I could not take ONE MORE SALAD on that bullshit diet, and this is one hell of a great excuse to pork out on salt & vinegar chips.

Oh, not really. I’ve taken a few, you can view them here.

What are the life stories of Dog and Cat? Who came first, how did they end up with you? –Operation Pink Herring

I chose Cat from the Humane Society in Corvallis when she was a tiny, horrid little kitten who reached a miniscule paw through the cage and ripped up my hand when I tried to pet her. I think that was about 9 years ago or so.

We adopted Dog from a local Lab breeder in 2002. Overall, in terms of Pet Performance, she has outdone Cat on many levels, but neither of them are what I’d call gifted animals.

Do you foresee any problems with how Riley might react to his early days being read about by so many people? — Stan

I hope not. I mean, I hope that someday when he’s older he’ll find value in reading these stories from my life and his. I hope he’s interested enough in what our day to day life was like, and more specifically, what his mother was like as a person, that these entries–despite all the NC-17 language–will be something he (and his brother or sister) will eventually enjoy.

If not, we’ll cross that bridge when we come to it.

Ok, first off, I’ve never seen or heard much about your younger years. The uh, 16-25 range. I know you are about a decade older than me which puts you smack dab in the eighties. I always pictured you rocking the whole denim white snake look. Maybe even in the Kiss army. So what were you like growing up? What was your scene? (and a picture wouldn’t kill you) — Josh

Boy, do you ever have my pop-culture background pegged wrong. Whitesnake? Shah. As if. Feast your eyes on this Blast from the Past:

bw.gif

Now, if you’re going to rag on anyone in this picture, stick to the person on the right, please. I quite liked that boy at the time, and besides, he didn’t ask for this photo to get plastered on the internet and mocked.

You’re more than welcome to point out the hilariousness of trying to be Goth . . . with crimped hair.

Who is *your* favorite blogger? — g~

I don’t think I can point out just one writer, and I swear I’m not just saying that to wuss out from the question. I read a ton of blogs, and I have a lot of favorites.

If you were at a steakhouse (of your choosing) what cut would you order and how would you like it prepared (Rare-Well)? – Alyce

I would order a filet mignon, medium-rare (preferably dark pink in the middle).

Crumple or fold? — Marivic

Clothes, right? We’re talking clothes? (Now I’m paranoid, after biffing the “picking” question.) I crumple my socks and underwear, I mostly hang up the rest of my crap. I hate folding.

Bikini’s, boy-cut, thong, or plain jane ones? (pre-pregnancy of course. they don’t make maternity thongs) — Ang

I cannot deal with thongs — jesus, just the thought makes me want to reef at my butt to get the annoying, asphyxiating floss OUT OF THERE. I like a boy-cut style the best.

For some reason I’m *dying* to know Cat and Dog’s REAL names. Even though I love how you call them Cat and Dog. — Samantha Jo (by the way, SQUEE for Samantha!)

Dog’s real name is Ashley; Cat’s real name is Meercat.

What is your absolute dream job (besides being a mom of course)? — Ashley (not Dog)

Oh, besides being a mom? Phew, because just between you and me, I love my kid beyond all reason but sometimes the mom gig is seriously a suck-ass job.

My dream job would be to author and illustrate comic books. Sadly, I can’t draw worth a damn. Other dream jobs include: running my own small business, writing (Clio-winning!) scripts for high-end ad agency TV spots, working on a farm in the middle of BFE, writing catalogue copy.

If I met YOU in real life, how would you seem different than you do in your writing? — Katie

I would be ridiculously, stupidly shy. Other than that, I hope I wouldn’t be too unfamiliar.

How do you find the time/energy to write? Aren’t you totally exhausted after toddler-wrangling, cleaning, cooking, working, scooping dog crap, growing a baby, etc.? — Lulu

I kind of want to be all Superwoman on this question and say, oh, I just set my alarm for 4 AM, but truthfully, I make time for the things I love. Which is to say I don’t always make time for cooking, cleaning, or scooping dog crap. Also, Riley goes to bed at–thank you, Jebus–6:45 nearly every night. That leaves quite a bit of time for ignoring the laundry while I sit, clackety-clacking, at my laptop.

I imagine the time I’m able to devote to writing will be poleaxed for a while after Smalltopus is born. We’ll see.

The burning question on my mind is…what exactly do your blog titles “Sundry Mourning” and “Purple is a Fruit” mean (in other words why did you pick them?)– Julie

I have no good explanation for “Sundry Mourning”, except it was 5 years ago and I thought it sounded kind of cool for reasons that are hard to remember. “Purple is a Fruit”, on the other hand, is a Simpsons quote that I believe speaks quite accurately to my overall parenting expertise.

I’d like to know how you capture the best expressions of your family on film? — Yams

Well, thank you. It’s all the camera’s ability not to take a crappy photo, honestly, and the fact that it powers up in a nanosecond–you can turn it on and shoot instantly, which is great for taking pictures of kids. Plus, I often take a shitload of photos, and then sift through the piles of rejects for the one or two good ones from the bunch.

If you had to, would you rather give up your favorite food (which is?) or give up blogging? — Junni

My favorite food changes by the hour these days, but I can’t imagine a food that could possibly be as satisfying as writing online.

Do you know how special you are? – Anonymous, who wrote a lot more than what I’m going to copy/paste here, and all of it was so unbelievably kind.

No, but did you know you made me cry when I read this? Thank you.

Do you ever regret not giving your first marriage a longer try? — Pickles & Dimes

No. I wish him all the best and I sure hope he’s having a happy life somewhere, but I was too young to get married and that whole thing was a big mistake on my part. Second time was truly a charm for me.

I know that having children must bring a lot of meaning to your life, and to JB’s too. But aside from that, what do you guys do (and I’m talking equally about JB here) to give your lives meaning? — Kerri

That’s a good question and it’s something we both think about quite a bit. I think it’s important for us to carve out time for the non-parenting things we love to do, and that means giving each other space for things like writing, diving, and just getting out of the house for an afternoon sometimes. It’s not that having kids robs your life of meaning, in fact it’s quite the opposite, but I believe in both of us pursuing our hobbies and goals as much as we can, and the best thing we can do for each other is support those activities. We love being parents, but we also have business goals, personal goals — things that don’t have anything to do with parenthood. It’s all about balance, and it’s definitely an ongoing process.

What is in your DVR/tivo right now? — Deanna

I just turned on my TV to look, and here, without any embarrassed editing, is the list of recorded shows:

– 30 Rock
– NBC Nightly News
– Curious George
– How It’s Made
– Inhale
– Rescue Me
– Blue’s Clues
– Entourage
– Flight of the Conchords
– Clean House
– Risk Takers
– Combat Zone

Random mystery bonus question —

Didn’t someone ask about tattoos? I could have sworn I saw it, then missed it. At any rate, here’s the ink-scoop, if anyone really did ask.

Okay, whew. I think I’m done. Thanks for the questions, and thanks for being patient while I laboriously answered them. Mwah!

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Marivic
Marivic
16 years ago

“Crumple or fold?” – – are you one of those that crumple the toilet paper, or fold into industrious layers before, ah, use…

hello insomnia
16 years ago

Oh that goth picture! I am rushed back to the days of crushed velvet, Poppy Z. Brite, and Robert Smith worship.

And where was the ankh in this picture?

Jem
Jem
16 years ago

Those were really fun to read! Plus going back to those old entries…somehow I missed the first time you posted your goth photo, and your entry about Dog and Cat was one of my most favourite entries ever…

Marivic
Marivic
16 years ago

My third ex-husband was a folder. Least favorite ex EVER. Weirdo.

anna
anna
16 years ago

Well, I am kinda emabarrassed to admit that Im kinda a folder – BUT, before you get all ‘whoa Nelly you wierdo..’ on me, by folding i mean like a rough fold…and like, I’m so expert at it that it is just as fast as crumplinng….really it is….

anna
anna
16 years ago

Awww, come on guys, I’m not the only one…right?….

Jennifer
Jennifer
16 years ago

My dad was a folder… I can even remember him trying to explain to me once (probably after noticing how fast the family was going through TP) that folding was more efficient, economical, whatever.

And now I wonder if today’s comments, similar to yesterday’s “picking” extravaganza, will be all about TP???

honeybecke
honeybecke
16 years ago

Doh! I should have asked my picker question mo’ better. My bad.

So…Linda, are you a picker? You probably aren’t cause pickers know all about the ‘picking’ but still…..I wanna know!

Also, Anna- I do the lazy fold with the TP too. I’m too paranoid to crumple.

missbanshee
missbanshee
16 years ago

Lurve the tattoo history, and I kinda adore the dragonfly. I’m well on my way of getting my whole back done, and even though my friends tease that I have a “tramp stamp” on my lower back, I don’t care. I got it as a right of passage, and I OWN it, dammit.

And the crimped hair?!!? LOVE.

Pete
Pete
16 years ago

By folding you expose more surface area. A ‘crumple’ is like a ball and exposes the least amount of TP. So logically the most efficient way to wipe your ass is with folded TP. Can’t comment on wiping the front.

Gentry
16 years ago

Your tivo list begs one last question: Jemain or Brett?

I labor over this quandry for hours.

Rumblelizard
Rumblelizard
16 years ago
starr
16 years ago

I’m a folder because I’m afraid if I crumple, there’s the chance for poop-fingerage if something slips and I ain’t taking that chance. :)

Eric's Mommy
Eric's Mommy
16 years ago

That was cool to read about your tattoos, I have 2 on my lower back. One is the Celtic symbol for Motherhood and there is a circle above it to represent my son. The other one is right under it and it is just a tribal type design, they are both black. And I had to have them both done over twice!

I also have How it’s Made Tivoed Eric loves it, and Curious George, he’s seen the movie about 3840503928384 times!

Christina
16 years ago

OMG, I totally tried to be goth but I was such a dang dork I never could pull it off but I have the ability to flit from most of lower level groups in our school so I hung with the goths but I also tried on being a hippy (which kind of stuck if you must know and yes I shave my pits and legs…), the brainy kid (OMG that so did not work but I took some cool AP English and History classes because of it) and party girl (which in CA meant I drank and er did other things, skipped school to go to the beach A LOT and got into a crap load oh trouble but never actually got caught…) Oh and I SO wanted to be surfer chick but I never had the money to buy a board so I just sat and watched the cute boys surf.

BUT you reminded me about crimping AND Shah only we said meg shah… What ever the hell that meant?!

Oh and I did not think we were (about) the same age but we are which is kind of weird for me… I guess I assumed you were a bit younger then me though I cannot say why…

stephanie brown
stephanie brown
16 years ago

oh geeze, here comes weirdo… I’m not only a picker, but I’m also a folder….
Sundry, can we still be friends?
lol

Violet
16 years ago

Um, I don’t want to seem like an alarmist but I couldn’t help noticing that “Weeds” is not on that tivo list. And that makes me wonder whether you’re feeling okay. Are you feeling okay? Why isn’t Weeds on that list? WHY?!

Sincerely,
A Very Enthusiastic Weeds Fan.
(And not just because it involves my favourite herb.)
(Honest.)

ShannonJ
ShannonJ
16 years ago

Weeds is awesome. It’s pretty much the only reason we keep Showtime. Paying $10 a month for one show is kind of stupid in this age of DVDs and online movies, though, huh?

wilddreemer
16 years ago

OKAY SO!!!!!!!!!!!! back in high school my freshman year I had a teacher ask each of us students crumple or fold. I was a retard and didn’t get it, so later I just answered oragami. When I went to a friends house that night and told her dad he was all duh Shannon they are asking about toilet paper! So there you have it, the crumple or fold question, people really are asking you, do you crumple or fold while your on the shitter!!! Nice huh!

wilddreemer
16 years ago

and also WHAT!!!!! YOU WERE MARRIED BEFORE UGGG I NEED TO GET MUCH FARTHER IN YOUR ARCHIVES NOW!

jonniker
16 years ago

I’m a folder, not a crumpler. I like my toilet paper in a neat, smooth line to better remove the debris without the danger of it un-crumpling and sullying my clean hands.

Also, dude, BEST PHOTO EVER. I love it. I loved it then, loved it now, and even better, dude, the OLD BOYFRIEND commented on the original entry, which I missed the first time. That rules. And he seems like a nice guy.

Operation Pink Herring
16 years ago

Loved those links to the old entries about Dog and Cat. So, if Cat was adopted nine years ago, that would imply that you named her before the strangely intriguing MeerCat Manor aired? Interesting. Verrry interesting.

Erica
16 years ago

That’s the second time I’ve seen that photo and it just gets better and better.

Penny
Penny
16 years ago

Oh my god. My god! That photo….of you…all gothed out…in front, of what is that? A Chevette? Oh you must tell us more about your goth youth. I had always wondered what happened to the goth of yore. You never see any of them past the age of 21 or so.

karamarie
16 years ago

I just mentioned that Dog and Cat photo post to Swistle the other day in an email. I was telling her it was the only blog post I think I’ve ever read that made me laugh out loud (and hard), and I still giggle when I think about it. Beautiful, beautiful.

I like how I’m always the commenter obsessed with your animals.

Isn’t Flight of the Conchords GOOD?

Alyson
Alyson
16 years ago

The questions and answers are great. But have you ever thought of getting a “cover up” of the rose tatoo done? That might be a way to rid yourself of it, without really getting rid of it. I have been contemplating the ideal tatoo design for a while (and tatoo placement). Maybe once Smalltopus is born, you could do something to symbolize your kids.

My Buddy Mimi
16 years ago

No one is allowed to make fun of goth/crimped look without posting picture of their own 80’s hair. Deal?

Josh
16 years ago

Dude, you have to fold your TP. First off, then you have like four layers of tissue between your hand and your crap. Second, you can half way unfold and refold backwards to get another good wipe with the same strip of TP. I think most people fold. It’s normal. Wiping from back to front on the other hand, is very weird.

I got a very good laugh from your goth picture. In an almost mean sort of way. I did not peg you for a goth at all. But that’s cool, a lot of my friends in high school were goths. And I have no room to talk about stupid trends ever. I tried the candy raver thing for a while before I realized that plastic pants with legs a foot and a half wide are gay as hell. Plus I looked stupid with my spiked hair. Then I tried to get into the whole skater thing, but I suck at skating, and coordination in general, so that flopped. Then I tried the punk rock thing for a while. I even had myself a good ol mohawk which I ended up shaving off in jail cause I didn’t want a judge to sentence me harshly because of my hair. Plus the black guys were giving me looks and I didn’t feel like fighting. But eventually I realized that I don’t really like punk rock that much and I was acting like a tool, so I quit. Now I have no fashion. I’m ready to get married and never leave my house again.

I dig the dragon fly tattoo. That one is my favorite. I only have one, because I’m poor. But it’s a really cool one. My two younger brothers and I all have our family crest tattooed on our shoulders in grey wash. It is bad ass. And it makes for cool pictures where we flex and call each other pussies and all that guy stuff.

Kari
Kari
16 years ago

Any chance you would provide linkages for the backstories on the first marriage and the sobriety struggle?

Katie
Katie
16 years ago

hey! You didn’t answer the one I wanted to know (which wasn’t my question) – has a stranger ever recognized you on the street from your blogs? (I’m guessing no, since you didn’t answer it.) Man, that would be crazy if it did happen!

Bitter Betty
16 years ago

Linda – that was such a cool thing to do! I loved reading the questions and answers.

I do it myself except I’d only get 4 questions. :(

Liz
Liz
16 years ago

Katie, I recognized Sundry in downtown Seattle! She was busy taking pictures so I awkwardly lumbered up to JB and said, “Uh, I read her blog.” I felt like the biggest dumbass in the world.

Eclecta
16 years ago

B-b-b-but what about MY questions???? [bottom lip protruding]

I think my comment is still awaiting moderation? [bottom lip quivering]

Seriously, a few of those questions I’ve been DYING to ask you!!! :-D

DDM(Sonia)
DDM(Sonia)
16 years ago

One of my favorite things about you is your candor, and I think you are so brave to 1)ask for these questions and 2)ANSWER them! Also, I really like your dragonfly tattoo, the colors are so beautiful.

mo
mo
16 years ago

HOOO RAH FLIGHT OF THE CONCHORDS!!!! :D

i’m expressing national pride in lieu of anything intelligent.

samantha jo campen
16 years ago

Thanks for answering and thanks for the pregnancy shout-out! I like getting attention just for having sex:-)

Jennifer
Jennifer
16 years ago

Liz/Katie, I’m pretty sure I saw JB in the Narita airport earlier this year, on one of his trips back from Asia. It might not have been him, but I sure thought it was, and I just didn’t have the guts to go invade his privacy and be a stalker and tell him that I recognized him.

Maybe a better question for Sundry (and family) would be: Do you like people to approach you in public like you’re a celebrity, or would you rather we give you some public privacy and keep our meet-ups to the cyber-variety?

Amber
16 years ago

Ashley and Meercat!! Thank you to the asker of that question, because I was also secretly dying to know names of Cat and Dog, but feared being told to mind my own goddamn business. Oh, and I TOTALLY knew Dog was a girl! Er, suspected anyway. You can tell by her exuberant dog-like charm.

Fizz
16 years ago

I’ve been lurking for awhile and just had to say I loved this Q & A post. The question about how Riley (and future bro/sis) may react to being blogged about is one I think about a lot for my own little one. It was really good to hear your thoughts on that.

the next one
the next one
16 years ago

I must say, you have excellent taste in steaks and dream jobs. I thought crumple or fold referred to laundry/putting clothes in drawers.