Comments on: Stop

By: piecemeal people

piecemeal people — Sun, 01 Nov 2009 04:51:50 +0000

So there have been 125 comments before mine, and I haven’t read them (Hell – I’m not even sure YOU’RE reading them at this point), so someone else has probably already made this point but I shall continue nonetheless: I think it’s PERFECTLY fine to put him in his crib when he’s starting to melt down like that – for you, yes, but also for him. He’s over a year old, right? I’m of the opinion that he’s old enough to at least *start* to make the connection between his behavior and the result – “Hey, when I act like a total jackass, I am suddenly removed from all the action. Huh…”

It’s hard to know when is the right age to start disciplining kids (I’ve found there’s a very fine line between “my sweet angel baby” and “who is this a-hole, anyway?”), but I do know that a lot of people wait too long – and then all of a sudden you’ve got a monster three-year-old on your hands who can’t understand why suddenly so much is expected of him.

By: akeeyu

akeeyu — Mon, 26 Oct 2009 18:20:15 +0000

My nephew eats hair, paper and fluff when he’s agitated or anxious.

Google “pica.”

By: Lena

Lena — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 00:08:18 +0000

Hi Linda – I’ve followed your blog for a while now, but never commented. (I know, who cares). But I woke up this morning thinking about this post – because, you know, I read it + all 3 gazillion comments yesterday. How in the world do you have time to read these??? Anyhoo, I am a firm believer that cribs should not be a place for punishment because as Nicole said, that can lead to sleep issues. I have 2 1/2 year old twins and have been very careful to keep their room and cribs a happy place, and it has paid off (I’m neglecting to add the part that they didn’t sleep through the night until they were 11 mo. old and I convinced myself I had to give them up for adoption, but that’s another story entirely.) And I was also thinking about the whole dog-hair eating thing. He needs an audience for effect, so tell him that you’re not interested in watching him and leave the room. Finally, I hate to sound judgemental because I’ve had SOO many moments with my girls that I care not to remember, but DO NOT THROW COLD WATER IN A CHILD’S FACE! Hello, people!??

By: Sarah

Sarah — Thu, 22 Oct 2009 01:57:09 +0000

Oh scary, yelling angry mom? Yeah. I know her too well. And scares me more than it even scares the kids. A kind of out of body experience at times for sure. When it was one boy, I did okay. I put him in his room. I stepped outside. When it was two boys, I kept my cool. I split them up. I stepped outside. Now there are three boys. I can’t step outside or they will literally draw each others’ blood. So I yell. Or I just give in. I don’t know which is worse sometimes. Ah, it’s all relevant. And they’re not half-bad if I do say so myself. And we’ve made it this far. C’est la vie. This motherhood shit is rough.

By: Juls

Juls — Thu, 22 Oct 2009 00:26:36 +0000

Having 3 kids of my own (my oldest is now 14!), I have totally had my share of exorcist moments when I find myself in a complete meltdown. On one occasion I was with a girlfriend when all hell broke loose. Mid-tirade, she handed me a sippy cup while acting like Vanna White and proclaimed me “Mother of the Year!”. Well, it was just so damn funny that I took the cup and made an elaborate acceptance speech which cracked up the kids. It is a running joke to this day.

By: Amanda

Amanda — Wed, 21 Oct 2009 02:19:04 +0000

Anonymous, I’ve totally had the same mental imaginings of Jo the Supernanny playing back a video of me shrieking at the boys in the bathroom! Ah, the comisery!

By: wealhtheow

wealhtheow — Tue, 20 Oct 2009 22:21:57 +0000

Been there, done that. YMMV, but I’ve found a book called “Positive Discipline: The First Three Years” to be helpful. It’s all about what stuff is developmentally appropriate and how to deal with it–which duh, I think we all know that tantrums are developmentally appropriate, but sometimes it is just so soothing to turn to the book and think “see, it’s not just my kid.” I re-read it when I’m having a tough time with the little bugger, and it helps me take a step back and realize this is just a phase and I CAN be patient, even though it’s sometimes the hardest thing I’ve ever done.

By: MichelleRenee

MichelleRenee — Tue, 20 Oct 2009 22:19:35 +0000

I here ya. I’m working on my tone..

I tend to snap more at my older child.

I think it’s because I expect her to “get it”.

I forget that even though she’s taller than me, she is still a kid.

Thank you.
This post is great food for thought.

By: Jules

Jules — Tue, 20 Oct 2009 21:36:28 +0000

Totally been there done that. Many many times. I agree with the crib time. It’s not pleasant, but it’s safe. You get a break, which you need, and he doesn’t get attention. I agree with the vacuum cleaner suggestion as well. You will get through this. Albeit with some new gray hairs, but you’ll come out on the other side.

By: Carla

Carla — Tue, 20 Oct 2009 19:15:00 +0000

“The moments of scary, angry yelling are the ugliest I’ve ever known. The brief helpless feeling of catharsis, followed swiftly by shame and regret. ”

THIS? Is exactly how I feel. We tend to think the rest of the world has it together when we’re falling apart. Thank you for being so honest to share.