This week has been kind of a grind, what with Dylan getting sick with a fever then Riley getting sick with a fever along with a side of Surprise Bed Barf (a surprise only in the sense that I’d taken every precaution possible to avoid a bed barf, including a conveniently-placed pan and a barrage of questions about whether or not he had to barf, to which his answer was a piteous and eventually annoyed “Noooo” and fifteen minutes later, SURPRISE!). Traffic has been extra miserable, triggering a pointless sort of existential despair where I sit in my idling car looking at an unmoving line of red lights in front of me and think O, WHAT IS THIS ALL FOR. JB and I have had to trade off staying home with one sick kid or another and that requires playing the unpleasant game of Whose Job is More Important Today, where each working parent presents their situation to the other in a depressing negotiation where NOBODY FUCKING WINS.

Also, the weather just plain sucks, like Seattle’s calendar all of a sudden got flipped back to January, and I have a giant looming nutrition paper due in a couple weeks and I haven’t really even started it, and there’s weird uncomfortable stuff happening at work, and I sort of feel like everything that’s really awesome about blogs is getting lost in a flinty-eyed money-based groupthink, and I’ve been trying not to snack at 10:30 at night like I normally do and it’s ridiculously hard, and god damn it, nobody makes flattering t-shirts any more.

Look at me, all Andy Rooney and shit. “You know what I don’t understand? Shoelaces, that’s what.”

All these tiresome little complaints have coincided nicely with a new play tent passed on to the boys from a friend of JB’s. We set it up in Riley’s bedroom and filled it with blankets and pillows, and the kids think it’s okay and all but I find it as soothing as a hot bath. There’s just something about being inside of it, with the light dim and filtered yellow from the tent’s cheery circus-like colors. The feeling of being elsewhere, even in the midst of everything. I go in there to read books with the boys and find myself reluctant to leave, long after Riley and Dylan have moved on to other noisy pursuits. I don’t know, it’s just like a big plastic-smelling Xanax.


Anyway, that’s where I’ll be this week until things improve. Slide a cookie under the flap, will you?


39 Responses to “Happy place”

  1. Pinkie Bling on May 26th, 2010 9:37 am

    I’m having the same kind of week – got room for a buddy under there? I’ll bring the cookies!!

    All together, now: this too shall pass!!

  2. Valerie on May 26th, 2010 9:39 am

    As a fellow parent with two kids and both my husband and I working… I had a similar “What is this all for” moment this morning. It sucked, and I cried. On public transportation, I cried. How pitiful am I? It does help to know that I am not the only one out there wondering what it’s all for. But when I pick up my beautiful little girls – 3 years and 3 months – and they smile at me and the older one tells me how much she loves me, I remember what it’s all for, and I am ridiculously grateful.

  3. jonniker on May 26th, 2010 9:40 am

    Yeah, the money-grubbers. I can’t take it. I mean, take paid opportunities, or don’t (almost everyone’s done one or two at this point, which is fine, honestly), but really, can we all stop taking this all so seriously? I mean, is THAT why you’re blogging about your kids and The Motherhood Experience? So you can “know your worth” for the stories you’re telling about your family? It’s so gross. It is. It’s gross.

    And the same five people are being judgmental assfaces about it, over and over again, and honestly, I just need to hit “unfollow” and call it a goddamn day and go back to writing about getting stinkbugs down my shirt whilst ignoring all this bullshit. I don’t CARE if people took a free appliance! I DO NOT CARE! Let them! They took a free fridge! Yay, for them!

    Why do YOU care, O Judgmental Self-Anointed Mommyblogging Arbiter of All Things Monetization?

  4. Eric's Mommy on May 26th, 2010 9:45 am

    Is there room in the tent for me too?

    My problem right now is that I lost my job back in October and can’t really even go back to work right now, with Eric being out of school in a few weeks. We can’t afford a sitter. I feel useless after being the main breadwinner for the last 10 years.

  5. Ris on May 26th, 2010 9:47 am

    Now I’d kind of like to set up a tent in my living room and crawl in there for a few hours. Hope things get better soon, for everyone.

  6. Angella on May 26th, 2010 9:49 am

    What Jonna said, Amen.

    And dude, I think I need to set up the kids’ tent this week…

  7. emily on May 26th, 2010 9:53 am

    I love my kids’ tent. And when they make a chair tent with a blanket? Yeah. There is something so peaceful about it. Calm.

    I like to put our real tent up in the back yard, too, sometimes…same thing.

    I hope things get better quickly…if it’s anything like my house, it’ll be horrible for a bit and then be smooth sailing for a while. The bad stuff likes to blindside me all at once.

  8. -Jen on May 26th, 2010 9:55 am

    The Andy Rooney line killed me. I’ll be laughing at that all day. Thank you for being able to bring me joy in the middle of your suck.

  9. Kathy on May 26th, 2010 10:05 am

    If while you’re in the tent, you happen to hear about some flattering t-shirts could you please let us know?

  10. Amanda on May 26th, 2010 10:14 am

    I find that when my kids are sick everything is wrong in the world. Probably because I’m exhausted and just want everyone better right now, thank you. Anyway, I totally understand about the tent. I bought one about five years ago for my oldest child. She never really liked it (weird) but we brought it out a few months ago. Now she & her 2 year old sister spend tons of time in there. They’ve put so much stuff in there, it’s ridiculous. Maybe I should clean it out and claim it for myself.

  11. lindsayc on May 26th, 2010 10:17 am

    The tent thing seems to just be link mental white noise, we love hanging in our tent too. And if you need a snack at 10:30, have one.

  12. Liz on May 26th, 2010 10:19 am

    Flattering t-shirts! I know of some! Target has these Merona Double Layer shirts in both t-shirt and tank top. They’re clingy, a little low-cut with a gather at the neckline, and long enough to cover my gut. The black one I got is great, the yellow is a bit sheer. They were on sale for $10 apiece, too.

    We had surprise barfing this weekend, except it was 2 hours of surprise car barfing after midnight in Montana. Awesome. She made it in a receptacle 3 of 5 times. The car seat still smells.

  13. JennB on May 26th, 2010 10:20 am

    I’m making Salted Caramel Brownies tonight, want me to send some your way?
    Sorry things suck. They’ll turn around eventually. Don’t hit me, it’s true. Just take a deep breath and remember EVERYTHING IS JUST A PHASE.

  14. victoria on May 26th, 2010 10:27 am

    I feel you.

  15. Jae on May 26th, 2010 10:38 am

    I second the Merona double layer gathered shirt and tank tops.

    I also love Lands’ End scoop neck shirts. I think they’re the Style #1? Anyway, I love mine and I’ve had them for a while and still look brand new. Pricey, yeah, but a lot of the time there’s a deal where if you buy so many, there’s some money off.

    Hope things start to look up for you!

  16. Kristin on May 26th, 2010 10:49 am

    Glad to know that I’m not the only one who loves the tent! My 3 year old will happily play in it for awhile, but I would stay much longer. I hope you feel better.

  17. Kelsey on May 26th, 2010 11:19 am

    If it makes you feel any better, I was a sleep barfer. Would barf in my sleep and continue dreaming until I would wake up in the bath tub.

  18. Jess on May 26th, 2010 11:28 am

    Hey – Saw this shirt and thought it sort of tied together Zombies and running in a cute way…thought you might like it;

  19. Courtney on May 26th, 2010 12:01 pm

    Duuuuuudddddeeeeee. This week is a giant week of SUCK for me too! Also: remember when the Gap had *real* white t-shirts? like the kind that you didn’t need to wear a $12.50 camisole under because you can see through a bull shit “tissue weight” T-shirt that is really a ploy to make you buy either two t-shirts or a t-shirt and a cami? Bull. Shit. Gap.

  20. Lena on May 26th, 2010 12:22 pm

    Hello from down SR203 in Monroe, WA. Misery loves company, doesn’t it? Your post actually made me feel better because I’m having the Exact same week. My twin girls are trading off puking and my hubby and I are having to decide daily whose job is more important… and this morning after being puked on twice and calling my husband to come home (which took him 2.5 hours from W. Seattle), it then me another hour to get to Bellevue… Oh, and how come none of my freaking pants fit anymore?? Must be those 10:30 pm snacks that I can’t stop eating!

    This too, shall pass.

  21. Melinda Handy on May 26th, 2010 1:54 pm

    I can’t really help with much of that other than to commiserate about the general weirdness all about right now. And also to tell you that I scored 2 t-shirts I really like from Target’s Merona line over the weekend. I’d begun to think Target had forsaken me on the t-shirt thing but then these two appeared just in time. Not too short. Nice weight material. Give it another look next time you’re there. If you decide to come out of the tent, that is.

  22. MRW on May 26th, 2010 1:55 pm

    That’s it, I’m hauling out the tent we got for my son a few years ago. My husband got laid off a month ago and that’s when I stopped sleeping through the night. Perhaps the tent will help (that and a prescription for Xanex…)

  23. Baking Mad Mama on May 26th, 2010 2:50 pm

    Arrgh, bed barf is the worst. Loved your tweet about JB sleeping in said bed – what a man!
    Interesting about the Whose Job Is More Important thing. I get a certain amount of days a year allocated for looking after a puking child, but if I didn’t it’d be interesting to see who won this in my house. I fear it would not be me.
    Love your cosy hideaway! I might dedicate tomorrow afternoon to building a den.

  24. Deb on May 26th, 2010 3:04 pm

    Lookit. People who run freaking MARATHONS should be allowed to snack with impunity. The end, you’re welcome, have a brownie.

    Speaking of brownies, can we just make some kind of rule that people who talk about Salted Caramel Brownies have to post a link or something? Some of us might be highly suggestible. I’ve got a monkey on my back, JennB! Help a girl out!

  25. H on May 26th, 2010 3:08 pm

    Andy Rooney kills me – and not in a “haha that’s funny” kind of way. I, too, am having a horrible…man, it is sad how long the horrible has lasted…year so far. I think 2010 is going to kill me. I’m trying to focus on the few good things, the glass half full and all that. I guess I need a yellow tent. I hope you feel better in your cozy yellow tent.

  26. yaya on May 26th, 2010 4:30 pm

    Been there…doing that.

    Not sure if a day has gone by lately that the husband and I haven’t looked at one another and say “and this is all for what exactly?” Some of my friends and I are starting a mama group (not a playgroup, no kids allowed during this gathering), basically a place to sit around, weep, laugh, eat & bitch about how kids have changed our lives & marriages so much we don’t recognize ourselves anymore…and trade any tricks on how to keep moving forward, every day…with maybe with a little bit more joy & passion and…here’s to hoping!

  27. Dog training??? | Crate Train A Puppy on May 26th, 2010 5:15 pm

    […] Happy place : All & Sundry […]

  28. Victoria on May 26th, 2010 7:06 pm

    Cookie on the way. Hang in there.

  29. Garnish on May 26th, 2010 7:09 pm

    I hear ya girl, I hear ya. This too shall pass. It really will. And can I just say that you totally rocked the kilt in the 5K!

  30. Trope on May 26th, 2010 8:20 pm

    A-MEN, sister. Pass the cookies.

  31. Samantha on May 26th, 2010 9:42 pm

    Thanks for the idea. I’ve been looking for a Xanax feel without the unfortunate side effects ;) and I happen to have a tent that we bought for the kids. I will pull it out tonight and see if I can finally calm down.

  32. Annie on May 26th, 2010 10:33 pm

    Sounds like fun! I’ll bring the cookies and brownies!

  33. Kami on May 27th, 2010 7:20 am

    My 2yo just got his tonsil and adenoids removed. He needs to be home for two weeks to recup. I know that “who’s job is more important today” fight I mean discussion. Very. Well. It’s never mine. Sick kids suck. The life out of a person…

  34. Melissa on May 27th, 2010 8:12 am

    I have been filled with road rage and despair during all my commutes this week too. MY roads aren’t closed but all those people are now driving on MY roads and ruining everything for me.

    I don’t have a sick kid but I have a dog who’s old and mobility-impaired and maybe slightly senile and is peeing all over my house. And I love him but I am just. so. tired. of the pee.

    I think I will go buy a tent.

  35. Sara on May 27th, 2010 8:51 am

    I looks like a line has formed, but if there’s any room left I could use a spot in that tent. I make kick ass chocolate chip cookies…I can bring enough to share.

  36. telegirl on May 27th, 2010 11:04 am

    Parallel lives? Only our tent is orange and blue and shaped like a fish (luuuurve). Our three year old is home for the THIRD day with a mysterious 102 degree fever. Only difference? My husband just started a job and can’t take time off yet so it’s up to me. But, I’m thankful he has a job and life continues…

    On a side-note, you’ve mentioned fears that your children have. Our son is now petrified of the doctor after getting shots there. So yesterday, when I took him in to make sure all is well, he threw an *absolute* shit fit in the parking lot. Screaming, grabbing at the truck door, running away, etc. I’m sure people thought I was beating him and others were looking at me swearing off ever wanting children. EVER. So, my question, if you all will be so kind: how do you deal with this fear?! Suckers, candy, trips-to-the-park bribing no only didn’t work, it made it worse.

  37. Katie @ Can't Get There From Here on May 27th, 2010 11:16 am

    You should totally set the tent up around the driver’s seat of the car. Then you won’t mind the miserable traffic. Win-win!

  38. Shawna on May 28th, 2010 8:33 am

    The salted caramel brownies were on one of Pdub’s pages this week or last. Let me look…

    Ah, there it is!

    I feel like I should say both “you’re welcome” and “I’m sorry” for posting that link.

  39. Amy on May 28th, 2010 10:53 am

    The tent is awesomness! Can I move in?? California weather is just as awful. Two pathetic faces looking at me last night after being told it was bedtime, “But we didn’t jump on the trampoline or hit baseballs yet!” I know…it’s memorial day weekend…let’s have a fire in the fireplace. What the hell?????

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