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Dec
7
Sometimes I’m pretty good at predicting which way the comments are going to go on my Stir articles, but I have to say, this one has exceeded my wildest expectations.
:::
That gym I’ve been going to has a bunch of family activities on the weekend, including a big sports court filled with inflatable things. We took the boys there last Sunday, and as soon as I saw the enormous towering balloon-slide I thought, there’s no way either of them are trying that. It must have been like 30 feet tall, no shit. I would have been intimated to slide down the damn thing.
Plus, you know, Riley. With the tentative, nervous-of-new-things thing. I figured we’d take a look at it and move on to the tamer jumpy castle or maybe the basketball area. some Ping-Pong balls around.
Well, damned if he didn’t get right in line, scale it like a pro without a single moment of hesitation, and come barreling down at lightning speed in order to shout, “THAT WAS SO AWESOME! CAN I DO IT AGAIN?”
After that, he coached his little brother into going, too. “Dylan, you go in front of me so I can make sure you’re okay. It’s a little scary but I promise you’ll have fun.”
Oh, you guys. Is it dumb to get teary-eyed over a huge garish inflatable slide punnishly labeled MOUNT RUSHMORE? Because I totally did.
:::
We started giving Riley an allowance recently, and I settled somewhat arbitrarily on the amount of $2 per week. For that he’s expected to clean his room, pick up toys in the living room, feed the cat, make sure the shop is picked up after he’s in there with his dad, and tidy his pens and crap from the kitchen table—otherwise I cruelly pocket the money and buy half a Starbucks.
I know there’s no one right answer, but I thought I’d ask you what your allowance strategy is. How did you decide when to start, how much to dole out, etc?
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I give the Girl $5 whenever I have cash, which is practically never.
Also – the readers at The Stir? 50% awesome, 50% asshats. WTFF, people?
I think the right amount of allowance is so that he has to save up for stuff he wants without having to wait so long that (due to development, maturity, etc) he doesn’t forget what his goal is.
My friend has two girls and one of the things their allowance/job money goes towards is spending when kiddos are out with their own friends (ie. after school). The one daughter will find free activities or be a homebody. The other has two part time jobs and prefers cash for bday/xmas gifts. It’s a really great way to learn more about personalities and teach consequences of prioritizing different values.
1) We gave Sofia a list of things she was supposed to do every day: clean her room, feed the cat, etc. Every day she did it, she got a star on a chart. At the end of the week, if she got more than a certain number of stars, then she got $2. That way she could work on consistency, but she didn’t have to be perfect. As she got better I ramped up the reward and also the number of stars required to get it.
2) The comments on that Stir article make me so happy. My favorite: “Sorry but this artcak was stupid.” Well said!
My almost 4 year old girl did a similar thing to the slide back around Halloween. Similar scene with a zipline that was maybe 6 feet off the ground at a local pumpkin patch. I knew she was scared of it but after she watched and studied it, with kids going down it, for several minutes she finally jumped up on the platform and took her turn. She went down and got off and expressed no desire to do it again, but I was so proud that she looked it the eye and whipped it.
Hooray for Riley! And the title Mt. Rushmore made me giggle. Is it supposed to be satirical? Haha-sorry. :)
Thanks for linking to the Stir comments, that was HILARIOUS. I guess I just assumed that most of the people who read your articles over there came from here and know you. Guess not.
There is no real logic to this, but I always thought a good weekly allowance is $5 when you’re 5, $6 when you’re 6, etc.
We started in 1st grade with $3/week, so pretty similar. She has used it for things like a sparkly Hello Kitty case for a hand-me-down iPod touch and a ridiculously over priced back pack that she REALLY WANTED.
re the comments on your article: I think “woman your nuts” said it all. Woman! Your Nuts! So perfect.
I can’t decide if my favorite comment was the “us parents are santa, we see our kids when they are asleep…” or the one that rambled off in (half) parentheses about their kids in their 30s and I seriously couldn’t follow it, even though I gave it a fully half-hearted attempt. Just impressive collection of individuals over there.
Way to go Riley on tackling that slide, too! So awesome for him to do it non-prompted!
I give my kids half their ages in allowance 10-year-old gets $5). It’s not tied to chores. They have to help around the house because they’re members of the family. Most of the time they forget to ask for it, though.
Also, re: offensive carols, the comments are a riot. Also I was surprised you didn’t include Baby It’s Cold Outside (date rape is jolly good fun!)
Oh, allowances. I kind of have a different perspective. My kids each get five bucks a week, but that’s to teach them about money. They save some, spend some, and give some to charity. No formula, it’s random, because I’m just not that organized. If we make it to the bank, they save it. If there’s a charity drive at school, they eagerly donate.
But the policy at our house, that I enforce with an iron fist, is, “YOU LIVE HERE, YOU HELP.” They are 7 and 9 and have lots of chores that they help out with. Emptying the dishwasher, setting and clearing the table, helping with the laundry, taking out the garbage and looking after the cat (feeding AND litter); and now they’re learning how to cook. I don’t want to think they deserve to get paid for doing these things – I’m worried that’s going to set them up for a lifetime of entitlement and actually end up demotivating them. Sorry this got a little long. I kind of feel strongly about this one. Also. Your nuts. HAHAHAA! Those Stir readers are… something.
Again, arbitrary my daughter is very similar in age to Riley and we do a similar reward system to Scott- a list of seven responsibilities a day (all surprisingly honestly self-reported, a responsibility in itself) and she has to get a certain number of stars to get her allowance. It’s set low enough that she has never NOT got her allowance, which I think helps her little perfectionist head to admit to not being perfect (she can have a bad day and not be a bad person) We go with 3 dollars, and use a Moonjar which has 3 choices- spend, save and share and she gets to distribute it however she wants. The “save” goes away to the bank (essentially forever in her world) and the “share” is used to make a donation in a way she can see- for instance, she bought a blanket and gave it to our local no-kill shelter in person. The share part has been especially fun- I had a similar Rushmore moment when she put all three dollars in that tin after watching A Charlie Brown Christmas. It’s the little moments that make it worth it!
My girls are a little older but they get $10 a week. However, with that money, they have to buy birthday presents for their friends, school tshirts, and fast food other then family meals etc. I make them save half each week for the types of things that they dont have a choice to buy (ie school tshirts), until they have $25 in savings. Then they can blow the rest. This forces them to understand wants and needs and that needs come first… Theorhetically.
I have one child that saved all her money, buys brand name clothes and cool gadgets. They other blows it as fast as I give it to her. They easch have their own closets full of clothes but I also make them share clothes, except what they purchase with their own money. This doesn’t go over well for the child with no-name jeans.
Im not sure what the right answer is.
The comments on your article make me sad. Are people really that dense? Yes. Yes they are. And clearly full of rage!
Yay for Riley! And what a sweet, protective big brother he is.
Loved the article, but the comments were so over the top! My favorite line: “…you clearly dont understand what they mean. for instance santa claus is coming to town um hello us parents are santa claus and of course we see our kids when they are sleepin and when they are awake and everything our kids do.”
Actually, it’s really a toss up between that one and this: “Oh please. What a bunch of crap. More fodder for you over sensitive Christian “keep Christ in christmas” fox news worshipping morons.”
Wow. Just, wow. Maybe the sarcasm gene is a PNW thing…
Wow, so, Bob the horse, huh? *facepalm*
I read the comments on this post, for pure entertainment.
Someone actually said, “… um HELLO us parents are Santa Claus…” like, the commentor, I guess, didn’t realize that you knew.
Then I laughed so hard, I cried.
My kids are a bit older. I do $5 a week. $2 of it goes directly into jars in the kitchen to save. The rest is up to them. Like some of the other commenters, we don’t attach allowance to chores. Allowance is to learn about money, (and so that when they want something at the dollar store and I tell them they need to use their own money for it, they actually have some…heh). Chores are because if you want to live here, by god you’re going to contribute! No right answer though. We started with $2, or whatever change I had kicking around. Nothing wrong with attaching it to chores. Just do what works for you.
Also… that slide looks freakin awesome! I’m with you on the teary moment. Yay Riley!!!
And another also… sarcasm is wasted on so many people. Tragic.
OH GOD that Stir article is awesome. Some of those commenters are….quite special.
I don’t have children, but I started to receive an allowance at about 8 or 9. I think it was about five dollars a week. I was also given a fake checkbook and would “deposit” money with my parents and write checks for the big things I wanted to buy. Looking back, it’s a cute way to learn money management, but I don’t know how practical check-writing knowledge is going to be to the future. Likely a piggy bank would serve the same function.
I understand the people who say that they chores are separate from the money, and the allowance is to just learn about money in general. However, it’s also important to learn that money comes from work, and it isn’t just handed to you. The consequence of not getting an allowance when you don’t do your chores helps with that aspect. I guess it can go either way.
Heh heh! Loved the 5 most offensive songs!!! But even more I loved the comments from the differently abled (STUPID) commenters. OH MY “All knowing supreme deity”(GOD). WTF is wrong with people? Have they lost all sense of what is freakin’ hilarious in this world???
I guess in the future you will have to spell it out for them: “The following article is meant to be: a joke, not real, just in fun, for shits and giggles (SATIRE).
Jeez.
You make me laugh. Enjoy your festive December celebrations (MERRY CHRISTMAS!)
P.S. Watching big brothers protect and help their little brothers is amazing and shows what awesome kids they have become due to good pareting :)
You wrote something that inspired someone to actually comment: “Thanks for making the holiday a little bitter”. Also, loving the repeated ALL CAPS explanations that gay used to mean happy. I hope you are proud of yourself (you should be!). It takes something really special to smoke out that many asshats from their hidey holes.
And yay for Riley! I love those moments of triumph. They make me tear up too!
Aghhhhh the comments at The Stir simultaneously amused and terrified me. Horrible realization that people exist out there that are like that. HOLD ME. Also, still laughing about Bob’s tail.
As good as your Stir article was, and it was quite clever, you could not have written funnier comments if you haggled over them, biting your nails, for hours. There really is a WHOLE lot ‘o stupid in the world…
I have had a few of those teary moments. My five year old is…sensitive…like Riley. Most recently, I was unbelievably proud of him for not freaking out in a bqd way over losing his first tooth.
Woke up this morn (east coast) feeling a cold coming on. First on list, read your blog! Thank you for your humor and writings. Now that I have lmao, I can get through my day “gay”! Bravo Linda!
Haha! I just posted my own comment on the Christmas Carols post. I read it the other day but it came up in my Google Reader. Man, people can be such idiots can’t they?
How awesome that Riley just scaled those stairs and went down. I’d be friggin’ terrified and I’m 51!
I gave my son an allowance when he got a little older (around 10) and it wasn’t tied to chores only because 1) the chores were expected and 2) everyone needs a little cash in their pockets. I did this because I didn’t want to get into the tussle of “well, you didn’t do this, this week and you didn’t do that that week” which would have been common and turn into a constant battle.
Now he has a real job and know that if he doesn’t work – he doesn’t get paid and I haven’t had to shell out a dime to him through is 4 years of college. Even during the summer (yay me!).
I don’t think the thought of my 5yo sliding down Mount Rushmore would bring the tears, but the “You go in front of me so I can make sure you’re okay” would have had me bawling like a baby!
The Stir article was gold! And the comments made it all the better!
My boys are the same age as yours and we don’t do allowances yet. We do give poker chips for good behavior and when chores are finished (take away chips when they’re being jerks) and at the end of the week if they have a certain amount of chips in their jars they get to go shopping for a small toy/present
Oh my gosh….the Stir comments….I have no words.
As for the allowance, I feel totally cheap now…my 5 year old gets $.75 and my 3 year old gets .30 Ha, better look at an increase. Anyway, here’s the banks we use. I LOVE them and I think they work great to learn about saving and sharing as well…
http://www.timbuktoys.com/timbuk/product.asp?pf_id=PAAAIABAFPGNMDDG&ad_id=BING&key_id=MOONJAR%20CLASSIC
1. Those comments are beyond awesome.
2. YAY, Riley!
3. My kids get $2 each, and while we don’t have specific chores, they are expected to clean up when I ask, help with making lunches, etc. Last week, I had them spend over 1/2 hour doing a deep clean/organize and I surprised them with an extra $2 after we were done.
My kiddo gets a dollar a week for each year that he is in age. We also call it payday instead of allowance b/c payday is what happens with mom & dad for working so we can draw parallels. He earns it by going to school (which is his “job”); stuff around the house is expected because he lives there too. Payday is split into 4 categories- spend, save, invest & donate. At the end of each year, he gets to choose the charity to donate his money to and we match the amount. Save goes into the bank while invest goes into investments (once it reaches a certain amount).
Also, there is a book “Earn It, Learn It” that I helped out with one of the chapters. It gives a different perspective on earning money. It has kids learn about different careers. Just another idea…
http://www.earnmykeep.com/
It’s the brotherly concern that made me teary. Oh, when they play together or watch out for each other – that’s when having more than one is SO WORTH IT.
I had read somewhere you’re supposed to give $1 per age so we started at $6 week! So dumb, right? After a month of going broke we scaled it back to $3 week. We try to have him save $1 for a “longer-term” goal and the other $2 for whatever goofiness he sees at the stores. We also don’t tie the allowance to chores. Again, I read somewhere (a better source than the $1 per age thing) that they need to learn certain things, like making your bed and carrying your plate to the kitchen, are expected and not as a result of allowance.
I give them chores to do and pay them. The 14 yr old shop vacs the boys’ room (i broke a vaccuum cleaner in there once – not gonna do it again- frickin legos and crap!) for 1$ or the car for a buck. The 8 yr old uses glass cleaner and “cleans” all the mirrors in the house for 1$ and all the windows for another buck. The 4.5 year old fetches and sorts – like she sorted all the plasticware into circles, rectangles and squares (although she proclaimed it was too haaaaaaard and left a mess I had to pay the 8 yr old to finish).
But I also charge – most recently someone had to get their wallet and give me a dollar for sneaking and leaving the bag of string cheese out all night. The 14 yr old had to buy me a new roll of scrapbooking tape because he used mine all up without asking.
Making them go get the money and NICELY give it to me (no throwing at me!) hurts them more than a spanking!
And sometimes when we are out running errands and they want milkshakes I make them order and pay with their own money – amazingly all of a sudden no one wants milkshakes anymore. Hmmmmm.
Actually, Santa is bringing a cool wallet to the 8 yr old – it has flames on it and zips shut. We are fully expecting his crazy excitement over it and then his crushing disappointment that it is . . empty. (that will be videotaped for sure!)
Forgot to add cash is good but in our house “the coins” are prized. I printed big quarters(google found image) and cut them out.
They are awarded spontaneously (”thank you for setting the table- you can have a coin”) or for a reason (all of a sudden I shout “whoevers bedroom floor is cleared gets a coin!” and the kids scramble) – like finding a lost object (”whoever finds dad’s glasses gets a coin!”).
The coins are worth 10 mins of video game time. Or sometimes I will accept them in place of paying me back money or coming with me on errands, etc.
I wanted something that had meaning and the kids want video game time more than cash at the moment.
I officially lost it when someone took the woman seriously who posted about how bothered she was by “Chet’s nuts roasting on an open fire.” So not only did they miss the initial sarcasm, but missed the additional sarcasm and are wtf-ing about that. I don’t know what they’d do if they EVER heard my boyfriend’s reworking of the lyrics to Christmas songs. His favorite to sing is “Frosty the nutsack” and he sings the “thumpity thump thump” part with gusto!
Did you know it is an old family custom to give aunts allowances? Yes! Believe it or not! The average is around $1000 a week.
Oh my GOSH, this comment. Since it’s all the way on page 7, I’m just going to copy in its glorious entirety:
This is honestly the most seriously the most idiotic , innane , insane offbeat , ideas about some of our most cherished memories as ” normal ” children , your mixed up ideology of what these songs mean with along with your assumptions of what you ” think ” these songs mean in the real world is absolutely astounding . I kind of grew up in the ” Peace ” & ” Love ” Era and your diagnosis of what these songs means is just rubbish . I taught them to my children and they will teach them to their children who are by the way ALL ” CHRISTIAN” folks and yes we watch FOX NEWS but no we are not MORONS by any means . WE believe in CHRISTMAS and the CHRIST who gave HIS life to save us ” ALL ” We are normal everyday folks who love peace and quiet , have tried to raise our children to be moral and honest young adults ( aged 37 son , father of 4 and husband to “one” beautiful wife soon to be retired from the USAF and currently serving his first Pastorate in Biloxi, Mississippi , and daughter aged 34 , mother of 3 , and wife to “one ” husband , teacher of the Autistic . I guess we are a strange family after all ………….. Rudolph the red nosed reindeer , over the fields we go , you better watch out you better not shout , Santa claus is comin to town . Sorry just had to get this off my mixed up , maybe insane , schizoid mind
Just in case you didn’t realize it, “gay” meant “happy” long before it referred to anything sexual. You know, just in case you weren’t aware. Just trying to help. snort.
Since my son has been similarly cautious all his life, I totally get your feelings of teary-eyeness about Riley doing the big slide and coxing Dylan on same. It’s a big thing.
We eased into allowances once my son hit first grade and started wanting to buy whatever stupid plastic toy was popular at the moment (silly banz, gogos, pokemon cards, etc). He asked how he could earn money and I told him he could take out and in the trash and recycling for $2 when he wanted to. That may not seem like a big chore but living in the Pac NW we have an incredibly complicated recycling and trash program that requires all kinds of sorting and bins and crap. ANYWAY, the point is, after he did it for a year, I told him it would no longer be discretionary, but mandatory. He would continue to earn the allowance but now he HAS to take out the trash.
Since his 8th birthday I’ve started the same program with his laundry. If he wants to earn another $2, he can load his laundry into the washer and switch it to the dryer (I still fold it when it’s done). When he gets to be 9, that task will also become mandatory.
This Fall he and two friends did a leaf raking service on their own initiative. They didn’t earn a ton of $, but it was enough to keep them going, so hopefully he’s learning some kind of earning spirit here??
We give our 9 yr old daughter $3 per week allowance not tied to chores. She is expected to clean up after herself, tidy bathroom and bedroom, etc as are her siblings (who don’t get allowance). It’s enough to buy gum and apps or save up. We do dock allowance for chronic offenses though (like making mom clean up messes all the time). There is a responsibility chart (hah) that is supposed to be incentive to earn more money for extra chores, but we haven’t used that in a couple of months. Still a good idea when we’re on the ball. [Note: Emi has earned so much more money parking cars in our driveway on game days so $0.50 for manual labor = not her thing.]
I think allowances and chores should be separate. I give my kids an allowance and they have jars to separate the money in to (spend, save, give). I do this to teach them how to manage their money properly.
Kids should do chores regardless of an allowance since it is also about teaching them responsibility. You can put a reward system in place, but the reward should be something other than money.
This is just my opinion. :)
Who the F are your STIR readers? Wow.
My girls are 5 and 8. This year we started an allowance for them, not tied to specific chores. They each get $2 to put in their wallet to spend on whatever crap catches their eye. The oldest is saving for an Ipod Touch – and will probably get there soon (with birthday and Christmas money). The youngest spends $50 on a bouncy ball every time we go past a machine. They also get $2 that MUST go in the banks.
They are expected to pull their sheets off their beds and bring them to the laundry each Saturday, wash their clothes (with a little help) and put them away, and clean up when asked.
For an extra dollar each, they can vaccuum the toy/room and living room, clean a bathroom, put the dishes away, help me mop the floor, etc. There is no limit on the extras they can earn, and the money is theirs for spending or saving at their own choice.
In the summer, my husband gives them a penny for every weed they pull that has roots attached. I can’t believe they actually do it! Seriously – a penny? They obviously don’t know the value of their time or money yet :)
50 cents, not $50
:)
yay for Riley and Dylan (especially Riley)!!!
My kiddo inherited the thrill-gene in full so I’m only ever worried about him falling from high places, not being scared to go there in the first place, but I totally get it. Bravo, boys!
Also, your Stir piece is all kinds of awesome. The reader comments…well, I think they speak for themselves! (And now we know approximately 50% of the U.S. population has a sense of humor and the other doesn’t.)
Oh, Riley. I got teary eyed and these are not my kids! That was damn sweet of him to look out for his brother. Holy cow.
My kids get their age in dollars each month. (They get a raise every year!) The money isn’t tied to chores, they get paid regardless. But they do have things they’re responsible for and they are expected to help out when needed.
We started out with $2/week and it didn’t really do much. My boy’s inability to recognize coins gave me a brainstorm. Now he get’s one of each kind of coin for each year of age, each week, e.g. he’s 6 so 6 quarters… He counts them out of our jug of change. In a few weeks he could tell the difference between dimes and pennies. In a few months he was able to count by 5’s and 10’s. Now he’s cashing in change for paper bills. My four year old just likes getting a pile of money. She counts them herself.
He get’s his allowance and is expected to help out but can get extra for chores. His sense of value is still weak and I can sometimes pay only 20 cents to have my whole house swept.
I think I’m winning.
I recently started giving my 6 year old daughter a $2 per week allowance. To get it she needs to have adhered 95% or better to expected tasks-feed cat, keep room tidy clean up aftr self, put away her laundry, help load/unload car etc. She can also earn extra by doing extra chores (vaccuming car,sweeping etc)as long as I agree in adavance and she’s @95% adherent to daily stuff. System is working well but still not having as much success on a) stopping the “I want X, you never buy my anything” etc etc rant happening each time we go near a store or a toy commercial comes on and b) enhancing counting and change recognition skills.
I will however rave about the fabulous bank I got for her- the MoonJar http://www.moonjar.com/ that has 3 separate compartments for Spend, Save and Share. My daughter undertands the difference and splits up her loot (most goes to Spend but whose doesn’t?). She has also saved up for an arcade gaming spreee and given to the local animal shelter.
I give my 6-year-old daughter $2 per week for cleaning her room, setting the table, and sweeping the dining room, living room, and kitchen. All other chores don’t get paid — we all do something for being part of the family. If she doesn’t do the chores, she gets paid only partial allowance, or none, depending on how much she did. I think after seeing her purchasing power at Christmas, she might pick up the slack again!
“Dylan, you go in front of me so I can make sure you’re okay. It’s a little scary but I promise you’ll have fun.”
OMG, is Riley the best big brother ever or what!?
I got a little teary and they’re not my kids.
the comments on your Stir article are flipping hilarious… love love LOVE the post and I cannot fathom anyone thinking that was a serious piece.
Whenever my parents gave me an allowance, I got it regardless of chores and things like that. My mom said that it should never be a case of being rewarded for what I should already be doing. I always thought that made sense.
1) Go, Riley!
2) OMG the comments on your article…I don’t even…
Favorite: ‘What a anal perspective lol’ by Ron.
Bahaha the Haters are so Hatery.
Wow. I couldn’t stop myself from reading every single comment on your Stir post. That was unbelievable! I am sad to know so many people without a sense of humor (or ability to spell) exist. Also, Bob’s tail!!!! Brilliant.
I gave $1 for every year old starting at age three and it’s not conditional on anything. Everyone has to do routine chores, no one gets paid for them (they do get paid for some household projects, like cutting down trees and sawing/chopping them into firepit sized pieces). I added a variable bi-weekly amount starting in Middle School that covered a reasonable food budget and a twice yearly amount for clothes. I see allowance as ongoing education in money management. I’m big on letting kids make mistakes with money that have tangible consequences, like having to miss a meal because they blew their lunch budget on treats early in the week.
Of course I’m talking about a child who is now 16 (!!!!!) so it’ll be a bit before that’s a good idea with your boys. But overall, when they’re old enough to understand trading this for that I think they’re old enough to start learning about money.
I started to read The Stir comments then thought, “ooooh this is going to be good” so went & made a coffee so I could sit back & read & drink at my absolutely delighted leisure. I think many of the commenters might be the offspring of married cousins. I’m just sayin’.
I got teary reading about the giant inflatable slide and how he was looking out for his little brother! I got similarly teary eyed over my nervous nellie and a waterslide last summer! And when my 7yo thanked his older brother for the picture he drew by saying, “oh Ian! You make my heart smile!”
Gotta love those moments. No allowance advice….that and tooth fairy reimbursement has me stumped !
I’m so happy to see these allowance comments. We’re just about to start giving our 5-year old one, but have been arguing over whether to tie it to chores. There’s a good tool/game on Amazon – you decide on an amount (we’re going to do $4 or $5), then the kid divides it into 3 categories – save it, share it, spend it, and you set goals. It’s called the Get-it challenge, I think, but I’ve seen a few things similar to it.
The Stir comments? I, um, well… I just have no words. Seriously can’t decide whether to be depressed or just keep laughing my ass off. Loved the article though. Very funny.
Also, had the same experience with the big slide this year- I think my heart swelled up that day :-)
Our kids get their age (5 & 8) in allowance every second week. With the exception of Birthday and Christmas, we don’t buy them toys etc, they have to buy their own stuff with this. Its not tied to rewards or punishment…chores are done because you are member of the household. My 5 year old just sticks it in her piggy bank, she doesn’t really “get” the value of money yet, but is thrilled when she (rarely) decides she wants something and magically can afford to buy it. My 8 year old BURNS to spend every cent he has the second its in his pocket. He has to save $2 of that each allowance period. He is forever asking if we can just lend him a few bucks until he gets more allowance. He’s learning you can’t spend money you don’t have. We haven’t told him about credit yet ;)
My son is 7 and he can get half his age each week. We told him some had to go to savings and some had to go to donations. He choose $.75 for each and $2 for himself. We will figure it out again when he turns 8. He has a wallet for his money and a piggy bank for the other two (one of which he was given when we opened up his savings account). When he has saved $10-$20 he gives us the money, we transfer double the money from our account into his account online (like 401k matching), and we put the cash and coins back into the allowance jar to keep using. He can use his donation money whenever there is something going on at school or whenever he thinks about it and we also match that money.
We struggled with whether or not to tie his allowance to his chores. We decided on a combination strategy. If he does all of his chores on time (by Saturday at 8pm), he gets his allowance. If he doesn’t, he doesn’t get his allowance but then he also doesn’t get TV until the chores are done. I think the key is to consider what motivates your child (TV and money for our son) and figure out what you’re trying to teach him/her. We want him to know that you don’t get rewarded if you don’t do your work, but that there are also consequences beyond just not getting paid. What would happen if you didn’t do your work at your job? You don’t just lose your paycheck; you would probably lose your job, too. Also, there are things that he is expected to do that are not on his chore chart, like making his bed, taking his dirty clothes to the laundry room, cleaning up after himself in the shared spaces of the house, etc. Find your own balance and always be thoughtful about what you are trying to teach them in the long run.
*Halyn has died from the toxic stupidity of your Stir commenters*
I think my favorite aspect of all the derp over there was how everyone was in such a hurry to comment and tell you how stupid you are that they didn’t realize they were the eleventy-first person to rant about how “gay didn’t always mean HOMO, it used to mean HAPPY, you moron!! Why do you hate Christmas?” I really liked the commenter who accused you of wanting every one to wear drab, shabby clothes. I laughed a lot over there, but honestly, I’m a little scared by how many stupid people have access to the internet.
Yay, Riley —
I couldn’t read all those Stir/Cafe Mom comments — my head was ready to explode after page 3. Can people really be that dumb? Yeah. . . guess so.
Also, let us know if you give in to Aunt Linda’s allowance proposal. . .!
Love the article, but man o man those comments just about made my day! Amazing. Seriously amazing.
That’s alot of work for 2 bucks. Kid needs to learn how to negotiate. LOL
This looks like the Best Gym Ever. I’m beginning to wish I’d gone to that second round interviews for ye olde companye in Seattle myself.
Oh god those comments on The Stir were a LAUGH RIOT! And they just kept coming. Holy shit how many people out there think there is a horse named “Bob Tail” in “Jingle Bells”?! That made me cackle like a loon…several times. I can always count on a good laugh when I read your stuff.
I read something on Facebook recently that insisted sarcasm should have its own font. You should look into that. ;-)
My boys are asking me, “What’s wrong Mommy?” as I read, laughing/ tears streaming, through the comments of your holiday song post. I am so glad to hear that some of your readers, while they do sing the lyrics, DO NOT condone the bobbing of horses’ tails. I haven’t laughed this hard (or cried with fear for this world) in a long time. Enough said.
As for allowance, we haven’t started anything formal for our boys (6 and 4). They have chores, which we say are part of being a family and helping each other, but I do want to start a programme of saving/spending based on money earned for a job well done, as I do think this will set them up for financial success later on in life. I am looking forward to more comments on this thread, unless of course, they involve the word gay.
My FAVORITE comment was the one that rambled on about her kids in their thirtys specially when she commented that her daughter was wife to ONE husband. Um…okay.
I also loved how everyone told you that gay in that song meant happy. REALLY? You totally didn’t know that did you? Ha, hahahahahaha.
“Do you hear what I hear???” STELLAR! My nose still burns from the pop I shot out of it thanks to you.
I truely can’t believe THAT many people are that stupid. I mean, it’s scary Linda.
Next you should write an artical on how eating your kids placenta is like the only way to truely appreciate the shit your body just did for nine months or something. Cause I’d totally love the comments on that one.
In regards to allowance, my kids (ages 6 &9) each have a weekly chore chart. Most items are worth $.10 (things like feed the dog, clean room, empty dishwasher) but a couple are worth $.25 (schoolwork, vaccum, clean bathroom). They earn stickers on the chart for doing the chore WITHOUT complaining or being hassled to do it. My thought is that they live in the house and need to do their share, but I will pay for their cooperation. If they complain, they still have to do the work but they don’t get the reward. They also can do “bonus chores” which can be any amount and are usually bigger jobs. I usually end up paying each about $1.50-$2 a week.
The commenters on the other site make me sad. There are entirely too many stupid people walking around parading as intelligent life…
I’m laughing so hard at those comments on the christmas songs. Some people have got their christmas sweaters on too tight.
Aunt Linda has it all right!!!
What is wrong with these people?! If you can’t pick up on a little holiday sarcasm… Geez!
The comments on that Stir article Cracked Me UP! Some people need to get a sense of humor!
I have gotten teary over smaller things (literally and figuratively) than that for sure! It was so embarrassing at conferences when my daughter’s teacher was gushing about how awesome she is, I just wanted her to stop before I broke into the ugly cry.
I am lame about allowance. I always start a chore chart with stickers and all, and after about a week, it all goes to shit. I should get back to it. I think $2 per week is a totally appropriate. Do you let him earn extra for extra chores? I sometimes pay my kids to fold the laundry ;) (don’t judge)
I gave up with a weekly allowance since I never have cash. So now, my 10 yr. old and my 7 yr. old earn marbles for specific jobs. When they fill up their jar, they get $10….but they have to pay “taxes” $2 has to go to our church or a charity and $2 has to go into their savings accounts. The rest is theirs to spend or save. We had a family discussion of what chores were worth and created a chart. Also, they can lose marbles for misbehaving or not finishing the job. If you want to see a copy of our chart, email me :)
I have yet to figure out how to make the kid WANT the money she’d get if she did her chores regularly. I make a chart for the summer, but it never lasts more than two weeks. I did do a reading chart, if she read as required i’d buy her a new DS game, and she did accomplish that. Maybe a star type chart is the way I should go next.
Oh the comments! I started reading them and was so happy that people GOT it, and then…oh my.
The fact that Riley helped Dylan conquer Mt. Rushmore makes the whole post.
BTW, I have NEVER been able to get any work out of my kids in exchange for allowance. Needless to say……no allowance. Although if my youngest practices his viola and violin 5 hours a week (total), I will give him $10. Considering how much I pay for his private lessons, another $40 per month is not a big deal.
Those comments were freaking hilarious! I think in light of our nation’s fiscal woes, you should post Jonathan Swift’s “A Modest Proposal” and see if you can cause a good ol’ fashioned fracas over eating babies. For 300 years people whose satire alert button was never properly installed have been getting their panties in a bunch over that one and it just never gets old. People’s moral indignation + lack of humor = fun times. Thanks for making me laugh laugh laugh, funny girl.
Re: The Stir. I’m guessing that’s the first time you’ve been called an “over sensitive Christian “keep Christ in christmas” fox news worshipping morons.”
That blow up slide looks terrifying, and became all the more so when I noticed your kids climbing the stairs in the middle and they provided some scale, making me realize it was even bigger than I’d first perceived. I’m impressed!
One of my personal favorites: “May you have a aweful Christmas for making this season bitter and cold,you selfish and horrible prick.”
I’m terrified that these people are out there and raising children! But yay for hilarious (and frightening) comments to read!
Oh, my. About the comments, I mean.
*pats you on the back*
Also: your boys are amazing. I am not a mom myself, but two of my best friends are mothers to sons, and I have insisted that they read you! :)
(comments on the Stir article, that would be)
I actually died reading the comments on your “article”. DIED. God bless those fucking cretins. I had absolutely no idea of the extent of retardation suffered by some people.
Can we have your comments on the comments?
I for one hope you do not have an “aweful” Christmas.
ohmygodohmygodohmygodohmygod they keep coming!!! I weep! Also, I still laugh uncontrollably….
And now I’m scared that the editors of the Stir are going to shift their focus or whatever now that they know what kind of readers they have. Can they split the site into 2, maybe? You have to pass a quick intelligence test to read the articles on the other side?
I go on cafemom pretty often and sometimes I have absolutely no idea why because it seems like everyone on there is INSANE and just DYING to judge you, lol. Seriously though, they are constantly ouraged slash offended slash berating someone somewhere for doing something that may seem harmless but will actually kill and/or maim and/or detroy their childs ability to grow into a productive adult. That being said..You are sooo my favorite writer on there and I get super excited for the Walking Dead recaps every week.. And I love the blog, perfect balance of hilarious and adorable :) Thanks for all the laughs!!
Allowances … we never did allowances. If the kids needed a few bucks, they could ask, and if they were keeping up with chores and such we’ll usually hand it out. Also there was always something extra (and suitably nasty) to do if they wanted some serious cash.
We did do lunch money for school lunches and at least one kid saved the money and skipped lunch (or bummed uneaten bits from other kids!).
I never felt religiously about allowances one way or another, if anything I was uncomfortable giving kids money just because they were there. :-) In hindsight (they are adults now) I feel that they would have turned out pretty much the same whether they had had allowances or not. Two of them can budget and save, and they were always that way. The other two never missed a chance to spend two dollars when spending one would do, and they were always that way. An allowance might help some kids learn how to handle money but it’s not a hard and fast rule for everyone by a long shot.
I always read your articles over there, but after I read just a handful of comments on that article I felt like emailing you and saying, “how can you stand it??? doesn’t writing for asshats wear you out?” but that seemed rude and not my place, so I didn’t. I’m glad you mentioned it here. I couldn’t go back and read all the comments – it makes me sad that there is so much stupid and hate. I like your commenters here – full of interesting/smart/witty/kindness. (most of the time)
k
Ok, so I don’t know if you will read this, bc it’s like a week late or so, but I finally clicked on the link for most comments. HOLY SHIT. I have lost almost an hour reading them and they just keep coming and coming and coming. The crazies are officially out of the nut house! I’m gonna say it… “Legend….. dary” Amazing. BTW my favorite is the comments with the Emoti-cons banging their heads on the walls, etc. : ) AMAZING!!!!