Feb

19

Cruel parental photojournalism

When we were sledding in Sunriver for Dylan’s birthday I was at the base of the hill rapid-firing photos with my phone when this happened:

Screen shot 2013-02-19 at 11.11.20 AM

I promise you I was at his side nanoseconds later, although the photographic evidence totally makes it look like I just stood there like a heartless asshole. “Hey, I know your face is covered in bleeding abrasions and I’m not entirely 100% certain your neck didn’t just snap right in half, but say cheese!”

He was fine, thank god, but damn. Parenthood certainly has a way of unexpectedly elevating your heart rate, doesn’t it?

Comments

14 Responses to “Cruel parental photojournalism”

  1. Kim on February 19th, 2013 12:59 pm

    That middle picture should be framed. Pure gold!

  2. masshole on February 19th, 2013 1:03 pm

    Holy crap !
    Nice shot though

  3. Courtney on February 19th, 2013 1:25 pm

    I have some jerk re-action to laugh when my child has hurt himself. I think it comes from a place of “holy cow that could have been really bad”, but it comes off as just un-caring.
    Glad he was ok and the pictures really are family album gold!

  4. C on February 19th, 2013 2:49 pm

    We have a video of my 22month old taking a running head dive into a radiator last month. Luckily our immediate reaction is also on record in case the emergency room personnel questioned our parenting. He was fine, thankfully, and he and my four year old love watching the video (and yelling “BOOM” as his head makes impact…weirdos).

  5. Cristi on February 19th, 2013 3:11 pm

    I’m sorry.

    I’m sorry I can’t quit laughing at your kid biting it.

  6. NancyB on February 19th, 2013 6:59 pm

    Great “agony of defeat” picture!
    My son hit the floor once in basketball – 12 maybe – I flew off the bleachers so fast it was like I had wings.
    Scared the crap out of me!

  7. Michelle K. on February 20th, 2013 7:08 am

    I almost feel bad for laughing, but honestly he will think it’s hilarious when he is all grown up and has kids of his own. Heck, I would have this framed in the hallway if it was me!

  8. Joanne on February 20th, 2013 11:10 am

    Holy crap!

  9. Ashley on February 20th, 2013 2:09 pm

    YOUCH. But it makes me think back to when he used to pitch such a fit over nothing. Now it takes massive abrasions to get a good howl going!

  10. Gretchen in HB on February 20th, 2013 2:43 pm

    Am I the meanest mom ever if I giggled out loud at these pictures? :-X

    Ahhh…Parenting. Good times!

  11. Jules on February 20th, 2013 6:39 pm

    My youngest,(of four boys) got creamed in a football game in high school. I was a spectator in the bleachers, I just kept on saying “oh he’ll be fine” even as the ambulance pulled up. Goes with being the mom of boys, we get used to that crazy ass feeling.

  12. Kelly on February 21st, 2013 9:29 am

    Looking at the pictures after the fact, does he like them? Feel cool about the abrasions? I remember feeling a bit cool (a huge stretch for my geeky self) when I had stitches on my chin from a big bike crash when I was a kid. It got lots of wows and interest at school plus I was allowed to keep a cup and straw at my desk for water since I couldn’t use the water fountain. Special!

  13. Cara on February 21st, 2013 11:05 am

    I know exactly how you feel. Behold the photographic evidence of my kids’ faceplant: http://www.flickr.com/photos/mosier/164450445/

  14. Another Cara on February 25th, 2013 10:33 am

    Um. That. Is. Hilarious.

    Disclaimer/FWIW – I do not have children. I also lack sympathy.

    Still Hilarious.

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