Last week was the kids’ spring break, and they, along with their cousin, spent two days with John’s parents in Coos Bay. That meant John and I had two days on our own, which was delightful. We felt so drunk with freedom one night we went out for pie — at 8 PM.

There’s a big difference between briefly stepping out without the kids (our normal ultra-lame getaway is what we call the store date, which is where us adults go to Safeway and wander the aisles bullshitting while the kids are back home staring at YouTube), and having them totally under someone else’s care for a decent period of time. It’s rejuvenating, a bit like coming up for an extra-oxygenated inhale. It’s an opportunity to actually connect as married people, not married people with kids.

(I mean, even though we tend to talk about the kids the whole time.)

This stage of parenting is much less hands-on than those early bootcamp years, but it’s consuming all the same. Now we have, like, people around all the time, people who are present in a way small children are not, so pretty much everything we talk about and everything we do is as a foursome. It can be hard to step out of that and be reminded, this is who I still am as an individual, or this is who we are as a couple.

It was so great to have that break from our usual routine, be able to take a minute to think, Oh hey, it’s us. I like us. Let’s go get us some pie.

Comments

8 Responses to “Brief interlude”

  1. Stephanie on April 3rd, 2018 9:13 am

    Goddamn, woman. It’s like you’re inside my head expressing my thoughts (far more eloquently than I would, btw). Please don’t go away again. I need you/your words in my life.

  2. Pete on April 3rd, 2018 9:24 am

    Alone time together is very important. Glad you guys could have some.

  3. camille on April 3rd, 2018 10:27 am

    Glad for you to have some kid-free time. Completely unrelated: what facial products do you use? Your skin looks radiant!

  4. Donna Plumley Brubach on April 3rd, 2018 10:54 am

    It’s important to be together.

  5. Ginger on April 3rd, 2018 11:19 am

    But, here’s the thing. What kind of pie did you get???

  6. Amy on April 5th, 2018 6:54 am

    Sounds delightful!

  7. Suzanne on April 5th, 2018 9:21 am

    YES. I always feel like, “Oh right! I like you! I like spending time with you!” Because your time together is so different when there’s a kiddo around; as though you are two halves of one Parent rather than two individuals in a couple. That is poorly stated. But I’m glad you got that time! May all parents have MORE of that time together!

  8. Kate on April 11th, 2018 7:45 pm

    It seems so far away for me to imagine having kids who can participate in a conversation. Mine are 6 and 3 and conversations with them are… Well you know — find your shoes, bedtime is for sleeping, don’t yell at the dog. For us a “store date” is when we go to the store *with the kids.* I’m as excited for conversations with 9- and 12-year-olds as I am for the idea of leaving them at home by themselves with YouTube.

    Perspective, man. You give me it.

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