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Reading:

Ordinary Life, Elizabeth Berg

I liked these stories very much, the whole book went by way too quickly.

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Am I wrong for wanting this DVD?

Artifact:

Oh, like I actually ate this disgusting collection of "food" for dinner the other night. Please, that is clearly not MY pattern of, um, paper servingware.

Friday, February 18, 2005

JB had just tossed me an empty cracker box to put in the trash. "Let's see how smart the pets are," I said. Survivor was over, the laundry was still drying, and I was bored. "Hand me a couple of biscuits."

The pets observed the snacks dropping into the Saltines carton; I shook it a few times, and put it on the floor.

Then, I got the camera. Hey, I said I was bored.

Moments ticked by as the pets' pencil-eraser sized brains slowly worked over the situation.

Edge Thus Far: Cat, as Dog is clearly mouthbreathing here.

In an elaborate show of nonchalance, Cat began slowly rubbing against the box. Not quite pushing it over or anything, but just sort of...casually glancing inside.

Edge Thus Far: Cat, definitely. At least she is semi-focused on the box, not staring fixedly at the floor like a jackass.

Now we're getting somewhere. Staring inside at the prize, Cat began to tip the box over. Dog remained on the sidelines, vaguely confused.

Edge Thus Far: Cat! Man, she's like MENSA cat or something! I should call Guinness!

Um, or not. The slight whump of the box righting itself freaked her out and she ran off. Also, notice the line of drool hanging from Dog's lower lip.

Edge Thus Far: We have no winners here, people.

A dim lightbulb shone somewhere in the recesses of Dog's head. Determined not to let the cat outperform her, she began to stuff her face into the cracker box.

Edge Thus Far: Dog. Surely she's about to tip the box over and get the biscuit as it falls out?

Or....maybe she'll just ram her entire head inside the box, lift her snout, and frantically eat both snacks when they slide down towards her mouth.

Edge Thus Far: Dog, unless you're looking for dignity, because there is NONE TO BE FOUND HERE.

Having wedged her face entirely inside the box, Dog was forced to wait until we were done slapping our knees and staggering around braying with laughter (and in my case, shouting "I'm going to pee! Seriously!") in order to be rescued.

Winner: Dog, by a nose.

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