July 11, 2007

After our week of vacation during which there was virtually no forward progress on the remodel, the contractors have responded to JB’s whip-cracking and have descended en masse. We have no ceiling in our kitchen right now, just some dusty, ancient boards and a solitary naked lightbulb dangling from a thin wire. The lighting it produces is indescribably unpleasant, all we need are some splashes of blood on the walls to really make it complete.

The demolition has caused every surface of the living room to be coated with a thick layer of wood/drywall dust, and our kitchen temporarily only has partial power—which I cannot seem to remember, and continually find myself attempting to toast some bread, brew some coffee, or turn on the range, and wondering why in HELL it’s taking so long.

Today they’re doing something exceedingly loud with saws, the kind that make that eardrum-shattering high pitched screeching sound, and the backyard is a cacophony of noise and flying sawdust. This is of course the only place Riley wants to be (“AHTSIDE! AHTSIDE!”), and in the meantime Dog is pathetically terrified of everything—the noise, the tools, the sweaty electrician who said, “Well, it’s all kind of a pain in the ass,” when I said he could leave the power to the range off if it would be too much of a pain in the ass to re-wire it today (to which I replied, “DON’T I KNOW IT”)—and creeps from one location to another, trembling and constantly offering me a paw.

This is all fairly inconvenient, but I am far too distracted by my waistline to get too het up about some pesky remodel annoyances. My clothes are barely fitting, all of a goddamned sudden. There’s this Belly, and it’s starting to make itself known (at nine weeks, which is craaaaaaazy). I fear its potential.

Also, because I’m a sucker for both teaser campaigns and viral marketing, so I give you my latest obsession: 1.18.08.

Comments

22 Responses to “Chafing”

  1. Deon on July 11th, 2007 10:33 am

    Slusho.com check it out.

  2. angela on July 11th, 2007 10:52 am

    01-18-08

    OMG. Saw the trailer before Transformers on 7/4 and we ran home and started googling. Can’t wait.

  3. Ang on July 11th, 2007 11:01 am

    I seemed to “show” a lot sooner with my second pregnancy. In fact, I’d gained 10 lbs before my first appointment. No worries, though. Every pregnancy is different. It’s all good. : )

  4. nonsoccermom on July 11th, 2007 11:09 am

    I, too, had a frightening belly at 9 weeks with my second pregnancy. Not to worry, though, I’m 15 weeks now and it seems to be a normal size. For a while there I thought I might be incubating Godzilla.

  5. hello insomnia on July 11th, 2007 11:32 am

    Great, another JJ Abrams creation I’m going to obsess over!

  6. victoria on July 11th, 2007 1:21 pm

    OMG the “2 heartbeats during ultrasound” text message is GENIUS. You are AWESOME and you totally rock my world.

  7. Josh on July 11th, 2007 1:27 pm

    Stop worrying about your waistline. Do women every do that? Honestly. I’m sure I would find my woman sexy as hell if she were pregnant. Right after I shit myself and panicked because I was responsible for a fucking life. For real, if preggers chicks can make it into playboy, you shouldn’t be sweating it. Go eat some peanut butter encrusted sardine/pineapple shish-ka-bobs or whatever the hell you happen to be craving right this instant.

    And please, please, for the love of everything good and holy, tell me that was Godzilla. Or Mothra, Mecha Godzilla, or whatever. I want a giant monster movie. NOW! If i have to throw a tantrum that will destroy cities to make my own damn monster movie, it will happen. I am a little cranky today.

    PS, if you want a good substitute for sex, go see Transformers. It is orgasmic. Nuff said.

  8. Emma on July 11th, 2007 2:18 pm

    Ahhh – the 01.18.08 phenomenon. I’ve been following it religiously. If you go to the site ethanhaaswasright.com you’ll be further sucked in… I couldn’t get past the third section.

  9. Swistle on July 11th, 2007 2:55 pm

    It’s like Blair Godzilla!

  10. kj on July 11th, 2007 2:56 pm

    I’m guessing it’s a godzilla remake (gods no, please). Maybe they’re waiting to hear the buzz about it before they decide what the monster will be? Like some kind of hopped up focus group study. Geh. Makes me feel dirty just thinking about it.

    alas. can’t wait to hear what it is *obsess obsess*

  11. Liz in Australia on July 11th, 2007 3:17 pm

    Well, at least you can live on Cheetos and it’s only Riley and JB who are being done out of any actual food with the kitchen out of commission. Good timing!

    I stopped fitting in my usual jeans within weeks. Too uncomfortable. I think it’s just a repeat pregnancy thing.

  12. ShannonJ on July 11th, 2007 4:02 pm

    Noticed the JJ Abrams ‘Alias’ font right away. I miss it so. Is there a name for the movie?

  13. MRW on July 11th, 2007 4:17 pm

    Oh my god. Had no heard of this 01.18.08 thing before. Now will obsess twice as much to make up for lost time!

  14. Josh on July 11th, 2007 4:27 pm

    Dammit people. I went to that ethanhaaswasright flash game. Insane. It was so hard. I cheated. Now I am just twice as curious as before. My addictive personality is taking over and I will now be franticly browsing the internet for more of this mysterious whatever it is.

  15. Naomi on July 11th, 2007 4:53 pm

    And there’s this:
    http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1060277/synopsis
    Monster movies are so cool.
    I must admit that I thought it was going to be a movie of your ultrasound and that 1-18-08 was your due date. When are you due btw?
    Naomi

  16. Naomi on July 11th, 2007 4:54 pm

    OMG!!! What if the giant monster is in fact a GIANT ZOMBIE!! Sorry, just trying to freak you out

  17. Melanie on July 11th, 2007 5:56 pm

    Aaarggh!!! All excited, but there is NO QUICKTIME on this computer, and as it is work I have no administrative privileges and can’t download it and watch the video!! I will play the game instead. And maybe cry and pretend to be pregnant so I can eat Cheetos. Yum. I used to eat those crunchy Cheetos when I was stoned. Not that that has anything to do with anything.

  18. Deon on July 11th, 2007 7:00 pm

    People, don’t waste your time on that Ethan Haas stuff. It has nothing to do with 1-18-08. JJ said so himself. Of course he could be misleading everyone. http://www.slusho.jp/ however, IS related. The guy in the trailer that says let’s go to the roof is wearing a slusho shirt. Check out the History section for some fun stuff!

  19. Alyson on July 11th, 2007 10:20 pm

    I go along with the “you seem to get huge instantly with Babe #2” theories. I swore that I was going to explode almost instantly with #2, especially since I was trying to keep him “under wraps” for a while….I had just gotten a promotion! He ended up being my smallest baby…well, if you call 7 lb, 15 oz., small………

  20. biscuit on July 12th, 2007 11:47 am

    That 1.18 trailer froze my computer. Boo!

  21. R Wayne on July 13th, 2007 7:16 am

    Lady Liberty’s head landing in the street. How cool was that?

  22. scerin on July 13th, 2007 11:05 am

    Has anyone mentioned the bellaband to you?

    http://www.ingridandisabel.com/bellaband.html

    I keep hearing comments about how it rescued many a pair of jeans from nine lonely months in a drawer!

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