February 27, 2007

Pardon the post title, we’ve been making our way through Season 3 of Arrested Development lately and I have this need to randomly blurt quotes from the show. Musty old clap-trap, ha ha ha ha HAAAAA.

Thanks in part to your encouraging comments I called and made an appointment for the owner of a cleaning service to come by and “evaluate” our house tomorrow. I imagine I will clean up a bit before she arrives, because that makes a whole hell of a lot of sense, doesn’t it? Cleaning before the person comes by to see how much cleaning they’ll need to do? Anyway, she seemed very pleasant and professional on the phone and her business got very high marks on Angie’s List, so hopefully it will all work out nicely. Unless, of course, she enters our house and immediately screams, “My god, you people are animals! ANIMALS!”, then takes off running, her sensible heels clattering along the driveway and a wisp of dog hair blown along in her wake.

:::

Here’s a short iMovie video of some random Riley clips we’ve taken over the last couple weeks (pardon the cross-post if you already saw this elsewhere). I cannot believe how big he’s getting. I mean, this was just, like, four months ago!

(Music: “Helicopters”, M. Ward.)

:::

Hey, remember that diet I was on? Well, that whole thing sort of went to hell. There was birthday cake and some damn-the-diet restaurant outings and a whole weekend of we’re-on-vacation excuses and, ugh.

I realize that while it’s sometimes interesting or inspirational to hear about someone’s diet success, it’s beyond boring to hear about their failure, but I felt duty-bound to confess my lack of progress on this front (plus, this isn’t exactly the Bob Loblaw Law Blog, ha ha HAAAAAA!). Just in case anyone mistakenly thought I had dropped those extra fifteen pounds. Because: no. They are still there, the fifteen pounds. In fact, they may have invited some friends over, which, frankly, I thought was quite rude.

Dimpled asses: cute on toddlers, not so much on 33-year-old women.

So! What next. It seems I need something more structured than a general vague promise to eat better. I’m leaning towards Weight Watchers, since I like their sane eating plans and their obsessive little online tools, but do any of you have any recommendations for (non-crazy, ie forget juice fasting and the like) diet plans that worked for you?

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Rysk
15 years ago

Good luck with the cleaning lady (and btw should you hire one…you will definitely be motivated to pre-clean EVERY single time they are scheduled to show up, it’s an illness).

Seriously, try http://www.calorie-count.com the web site is pretty sweet and the eat meter toolbar is fab for umm….well geeks like me that sit in front of the computer all day…

Rumblelizard
Rumblelizard
15 years ago

I have lost 35 pounds since October on a miracle diet that really, really works. It REALLY works. It consists of the following: eating less and exercising more. A lot less, and a lot more. You may kill me now. No, really. Please.

angela
15 years ago

I have two friends who LOVE Arrested Development, and refer to my BF as Bob Loblaw (his name is Bob). Neither of us have seen it, but I understand where the reference comes from. But no one memo’d Bob about this, and they call him Bob Loblaw to his face all the time, and he is always genuinely perplexed. I haven’t communicated this to either parties, I just prefer to sit back and watch the clusterfuck.

Friends: Bob Loblaw!
Bob: …?
Friends: How are you?
Bob: Me? Who? You’re talking to me?
Friends: Yeah, DUH, Bob Loblaw!
Bob: What?
Friends: You!
Bob: Me?
Friends: Bob Loblaw!
Bob: Uh…?
Me: Hee!

robyn
15 years ago

I joined weight watchers back in January – and I lost 7.4 pounds in the first two weeks. The program works if you do it…and the counting part of it appeals to my anal side. PLUS, you can eat pretty much whatever you want as long as you plan for it – it’s the portions that are key.
It’s not easy…and to be honest, I’ve taken time off the plan because of restaurant eating or special occasions where I’ve just completely blown it. But I think it’s made me more aware of what I eat and how much I eat because even on the weeks off…the most I’ve gained is 1 pound. So far, I like it pretty well!

Mare
15 years ago

Weight Watchers. I won’t go on and on, you’ve heard it all before. The main thing is that they’re sensible, and they advocate a slow weight loss, so you don’t feel pressure to race against some weird idea. They teach you to set small goals, and they’re very supportive. Oh. Well, it seems I did go on and on after all.

victoria
victoria
15 years ago

Not eating (like, at all) works pretty well because it (bizarrely, yet oh so effectively) causes you to lose your appetite. You get so you need to eat only once every 6 days or so. Plus you really, really enjoy food on that 6th day. But you have to watch your potassium, especially if you’re exercising, so you keep your electrolytes in balance. Yes, come to me for all your “sensible eating plan” recommendations. I lost like 30 pounds in 6 weeks.

victoria
victoria
15 years ago

And weight watchers? NIGHTMARE TORTURE CENTRAL. Those teensy tiny portions? Jesus, just skip the WW plan and send me to Guantanamo Bay and waterboard me right now because I cannot stand the agony of being forced to eat TEENSY TINY MINIATURE little portions of “all the foods you love” and then being forced to STOP after two bites. Stop? After TWO FUCKING BITES? When I’ve just been reminded how much I LIKE that particular food? AAAAAARGH. I swear to god, I’ve tried ’em both, and the “not eating at all” plan is so, so, SOOOO much easier than Weight Watchers torture and misery. OK, my starvation plan is not “sustainable” and will not lead to “enduring weight loss” or “lifestyle changes” but it is so much easier than WW. In fact it was WW that drove me to the starvation diet.

lisa
lisa
15 years ago

I have sort of been doing the Bob Greene best life plan and it is great, it is basically gradual changes that amounts to eat fewer calories, exercise more, but the gradual thing works well for me because then I don’t feel all guilty about what I eat, but it really motivates me to work on it.

emily
emily
15 years ago

If running after Riley isn’t doing it, I recommend hooking up with the Rat City Rollergirls and skating it off; I lost 15 pounds in 3 months and continue to eat everything I want.

I’m pretty sure it could help with both the weight *and* any lingering annoyances you feel due to the home or office life!

Pete
Pete
15 years ago

Motivation. We had a ‘fat’ contest at work. Twelve of us put in $100 and the one who lost the most weight (percentage of body weight) in 6 weeks won the money. Since I had just divorced and knew I wouldn’t have any ‘fun’ money for a long time (2 years) I was highly motivated to win. I lost 32 pounds is 6 weeks and won. That paid for my scuba lessons and used equipment (if you go off the beach it was only $1 a dive, cheap entertainment). I also learned that a pint of blood weighs one pound (donated on the last day) and at 600 calories a day your brain develops a really long reaction time. My suggestion would be to find something that will motivate you. But with work, a toddler, trying to get pregnant, and more house construction, my guess is that’s going to be hard to do.
BTW, My wife wants a housekeeper, I want sex with Nicole Kidman. Guess were stuck with a messy house and internet p0rn. ;-)

Jennifer
Jennifer
15 years ago

As always, great video. You are so right – Riley’s HUGE compared to just 4 months ago.

And – “grandpa” in the video? Is that JB’s dad? Well, whoever he is, he’s a good looking man, and you can tell him I said so.

laughing mommy
15 years ago

I agree with Robyn. Weight Watchers works if you do it. Before my last pregnancy I lost 33 pounds on Weight Watchers. But then I had another baby, and well, now I need to lose even MORE than 33 pounds. I joined Weight Watchers at the start of the year and I’ve lost 11 pounds so far. But again, it only works if you do it. *sigh*

I love that on Weight Watchers you can eat whatever you want. If I want to spend 25 points on pizza, then I can. Of course, then I can’t eat the rest of the day and I’m starving… so it forces me to make wise choices so I don’t starve.

Swistle
15 years ago

My favorite is the “I’m Pregnant So Screw It” diet.

When I’m not pregnant, I like to alternate between: a bootlegged Weight Watchers Core plan, a bootlegged Weight Watchers Points plan, and a It’s Not A Diet, It’s A Sensible-Eating Lifestyle Change plan.

I think it’s more fun to hear about dieting failures. Dieting successes can be inspirational, but in an “I suppose this means I have to get my ass off the couch now, too,” way, which is non-fun. Failures mean, “Yay, let’s go out for brownie sundaes together!”

fellowmom
fellowmom
15 years ago

I have lost 45 pounds in the last 5 months. This is my 3rd time on Weight Watchers, but the first time it’s worked, probably because I switched to the Core Plan from the Flex Plan. In other words, WW didn’t work for me until I changed the kind of food I was eating, not just the amount. (I was less hungry on the Core Plan, for one.)

I like WW online, because the meetings just don’t do it for me. They take a lot of time, and all the “sharing” makes me feel squeamish. Since I am on the computer a lot, it’s really easy to track my points. After about 2.5 mos., I stopped religiously counting points, because I generally know what to eat now. If I stop losing weight, I will go back to the rigorous counting, which can be kind of onerous. I also really liked You: On a Diet, because it gave me some insight into why the type of food you eat makes a difference in terms of weight loss.

Glad you are pursuing the cleaning help. Sort of related: Have you ever read Nickel and Dimed?

jenn
jenn
15 years ago

I lost about 50 lbs. on WW last year (before I got pregnant and subsequently gained back 40 of it, and still have another 6 weeks to go before I deliver!) HOWEVER… I did it using their Core Plan. There’s no counting points as with their Flex Plan, which never worked for me for more than a few weeks. (I don’t do well being told I can eat whatever I want as long as I keep the portions in check, and also I found it to just be a big pain in the ass trying to figure out how much of something I ate and how many points it was for a serving and a half, etc.)

The Core Plan consists of eating however much you want of healthy foods like grilled chicken, fish, lean red meats, non-starchy vegetables (although if I recall correctly, you can have a potato or brown rice or whole grain pasta once a day.) You don’t worry about portion sizes. And you still get like 35 points a week that you can eat whatever you want. I usually tried to use those points for butter or cheese or something that made the healthy foods a little more appetizing… I found that if I ate some junk food or sweets, I just wanted MORE. Once I go a week or so without eating ANY sugar, I don’t crave it anymore. If I’m allowing myself two cookies for five points, that just makes me want two more cookies for five more points, and it’s a really slippery slope from there. It works much better for me to think of sugar as something that’s just off limits for me.

Oh, and I actually loved the meetings, and I’m not normally a “joiner”. I think it helps to find a leader that you relate to… mine was about my age with two little kids. Meetings are great for getting tips and recipes, and I really looked forward to celebrating my successes and those of everyone else who was “in it” with me. Good luck to you!

Mary O
Mary O
15 years ago

I just lost 18 pounds of post-baby (yeah, let’s just say it all came from the baby) weight on Weight Watchers. It worked for me because it taught me how to eat right, when I had gotten very far off track. It might sound dumb, but I kind of enjoyed the counting points and writing everything down. It made me feel very organized about eating, and made me learn how not to just go around mindlessly snacking. Also, it helps to have to go somewhere to weigh in each week to keep you accountable!

Also, my sister lost about 25 pounds on LA Weight Loss and has kept it off for about a year now. They are more expensive than WW but give you one-on-one counseling, which would probably be helpful.

jenn
jenn
15 years ago

PS… Riley is a cute little stinker! Sounds like he and my 2.5 year old son are cut out of the same cloth.

Alex
15 years ago

I’m with the others who say Weight Watchers. I did it a handful of years ago and it works. Godspeed.

girl in greenwood
15 years ago

The 20/10 Plan at the Corporate Gym I’m Sure You Belong To is amazing. My husband did 20/20 2 years ago and lost 50 pounds in 5 months. I played along at home and lost 35 pounds. I kept it off for about 6 months… I’ve since gained about 25 of it back, but I’m blaming nursing school. The good thing about the 20/X0 plans is that they beat you up in the gym (but supportively!) AND tell you what to eat, so you attack the problem on both levels.

I’ve also done WW online and liked it, but it caused conflict at home because my husband wasn’t on board with the WW Way. And I do not have the willpower to eat a salad with nonfat dressing and cook a different meal that has bacon or butter or, you know, anything that tastes good and then not eat it. But it does work if you do it.

Anonymous
Anonymous
15 years ago

I lost a fair amount of weight by eating the same old stuff but using a smaller dinner plate.

jen
jen
15 years ago

i love his giggle fits. seriously adorable!

sweetney
15 years ago

DUDE. i am fully back in ye olde obsessive calorie counting mode after trying to do the EAT HEALTHY! IN MODERATON! thing for two months and gaining 5 MORE pounds.

that’s it. dieting? this time, its personal.

H
H
15 years ago

Weight Watchers worked for me.

Yup, I think we all clean for the cleaning lady. I hope it goes great for you!

Melanie
15 years ago

I like when people fall off the diet wagon because it makes me feel better about my not getting on the wagon. But I suppose that’s a nasty, selfish way to be… All this WW stuff makes me think I should really look into it again, but maybe at the non-point-counting plan, because the other one scared the bejeezus out of me. The idea of a little scale and point charts or whatever sounds like another job on top of the rest of my busy-ass life, which I do NOT need right now. Hey, and M. Ward? AWESOME. Though I hate his new album. But Transfiguration was sooooo good. We said for a while that Boyo would say “el-e-copter” from us singing that every time we drove by the helicopters parked at the airport near our house.

KT
KT
15 years ago

MAN Riley is so CUTE! Such a killer smile. Thanks for that dose of vitamin cute!

warcrygirl
15 years ago

Weight Watchers works as long as you follow it, which sounds like a total ‘DUH!’ thing to say. You don’t have to go to the meetings but I’ve heard they help. Also: Relacore works, again, when you take it.

Can you tell I have issues with finishing what I start?

http://www.sparkpeople.com have free calorie counting tools as well. Sounds like we’re in the same boat, excuses-wise.

Ellie's Mommy
15 years ago

I’ve thought about a cleaning service. I don’t really need one all the time though. I’m more in the market for someone to just come in and do a nice deep clean so Daddy Dearest & I have a new starting spot for all the things we’ve slacked off on. Unfortunately, I have that same urge to clean before having it cleaned. I mean we are talking about the things we’ve REALLY slacked off on… GROSS!

As far as dieting, I’m not b/c my OB keeps telling me that this every enlarging belly is actually a baby (I’m sceptical). However, both of my co-workers are on Weight Watchers and they seem pretty happy about it. They don’t seem to be very obsessive and the point system lets them indulge (like today I wanted pasta, so my co-worker & I ordered out) without having that dieting guilt.

ESY
ESY
15 years ago

eat less. eventually you will even want to eat less.
don’t eat after 8pm or so.
stay away from refined sugars. (have something very small to just give you the taste if you need – make a chocolate bar last a week)
stay away from refined/processed carbs.
start you day with protien and fruit.
drink water – lots of water – when you think you are hungry drink water – wait then if you are still hungry have a snack. (veggies or nuts or fruit)

I lost 9 lbs in a month doing this and my only exercise was walking about 2 miles each day (which was not more than I normally walk)

Lesley
Lesley
15 years ago

As sickening as it sounds (and sometimes is), counting calories and exercising is the only thing that works (for me). I find if I stick to specific foods and vary the menu a little I get results. If one’s diet is too varied and filled with different foods all the time, it can become a real chore keeping track. I avoid all things made of refined flour (which is almost every thing that is made with flour, period) and sugar. I eat only lean cuts of organic chicken, turkey, and fish. I do not eat potatoes and other starchy vegetables very often. I eat berries every day. A protein shake in the morning with berries, ground flax seed, and wheatgerm, water and a decent whey protein keeps me full until lunch. Lean Cuisine on lazy days.

I do not go to the gym (can’t because of soft tissue injuries) but walk at least 30 minutes briskly every day and periodically do my Pilates routines. Usually I get an hour or more of walking in a day.

I also use an Infrared sauna twice a week (burns 600 calories in 30 minutes). Is also fantastic for the skin and relaxation.

Em
Em
15 years ago

That is the cutest video yet. I never think I want to have kids someday until I look at your little dude….then I practically squeal with delight, causing the significant other to cringe.

How is Riley’s relationship with the Roomba?

Serror
Serror
15 years ago

I am all for WW. It didn’t ever give me an “OH!” moment when it came to nutrition, I already knew how to eat healthy food. It just reinforced quantity importance. It just really really helped me realize what calories I was eating. Also, you do not have to go hungry at all, if you make good choices. I eat a lot of lean meat, veggies, beans, yogurt, water and fruit.

I am not in to the meeting thing, but LOVE the online version. So fun to keep track and honestly Weight Watchers recipes are worth it. Easy, good and good for you.
Oh, and exercise. That bastard. But even walking works (and yoga!)

Leslie
Leslie
15 years ago

My oral fixation means it doesn’t matter so much *what* I eat, I just need to stuff a lot of food in my face. So the key for me turned out to be canned Chinese vegetables, which are, like, 15 calories a can. I rinsed them thoroughly to get rid of the MSG, added a ton of Mrs. Dash to give them flavor, added a half cup of brown rice, and topped it with big chunks of raw tomato. It makes a *huge* meal, and the combo of hot/cold fills you up even more. You can throw in some fish or chicken if you’re in the mood, too.

Mrs. Breedorf
15 years ago

The Bob Loblaw Law Blog is regularly reminisced about and guffawed over at this household.

omuchacha
15 years ago

WeightWatchers works for me. I do the points plan online. Since the end of last month, I’ve lost about 56 pounds. I’ve gone from a size 16 to an 11.

Erica
15 years ago

For the last month or so I have been using sparkpeople.com. Like Weight Watchers, it consists of lots of obsessive online tools, but unlike WW it is free. I have lost 14 pounds so far (maybe more, I weigh in tomorrow!) I did WW, complete with meetings and weighing in front of a room full of people and POINTS all that a few years ago, but it made me WAY to obsessive about food, I mean in a BAD way and then when I stopped being a crazy person, it just stopped working. I’d lost 30 pounds and was still cutting points and adding exercise, but NOTHING. ANYway, like I said, sparkpeople is free so what have you got to lose in trying it? Best of luck!

samantha jo campen
15 years ago

Buster: I’ve found a new mother, Mother.

Mother: Then why don’t you marry her?

Buster: MAYBE I WILL!

Oh, and:

Anyong!

christen
15 years ago

I have lost 12lb on Weight Watchers since Jan. 1. Eating less, exercising more is great in theory, but if there isn’t some structured way I can write it down and have someone else do the calculations for me, I always screw up. I’m a frickin certified personal trainer and I work in a gym and I STILL managed to gain 50lb in two years. It’s not like I’m an idiot… I know how many calories are in things, and all that jazz, but without actually typing in my weight each week, or writing everything down, I always cheat and I always screw up. I go to meetings, but there are plenty of women doing the e-tools or WW online only that have lost tons (literally) of weight. It’s great. I still get beer, I still get fries and fast food if I want it… I just have to be accountable and balance that crap out with other stuff and exercise (which I already did to begin with, I just ate way, way too much to compensate for it “I did a spin class? I’m getting a bucket of KFC! Just for me!). I would be more than happy to tell you all about how great the program is… just email me.

Dawna
15 years ago

The only thing that’s ever worked for me is no refined sugar/no refined flour. Kathleen DesMaisons has some excellent books out about how carb cravings tie into alcoholism and addiction, and the food plan. Highly recommended =)

Nicole
15 years ago

You know, its not a totally bad idea for the house to be clean when the woman comes by- you want her to see how you expect the house to look when she’s done so set the bar high. Also, I know that with our cleaner we tend to prefer that she actually clean so we always put things away before she arrives. Unless you want to spend weeks explaining where to put every single thing in your house (and after her visit, days trying to figure out where she has stashed things), its easier to just straighten up before she arrives.

Thursday
15 years ago

Diet suggestions? Heartache – works every time.

Liz in Australia
Liz in Australia
15 years ago

I had just started to get serious about watching what I ate and trying to lose some weight, then I got pregnant again, so there goes the low-calorie diet. OTOH, on my previous record that also means I get four months of not being able to keep down anything except Vegemite toast and raw almonds, and lose 20kgs over the course of the pregnancy. Unfortunately I don’t think I can keep talking my husband into more babies every time I let the weight creep back on again…

pseudostoops
15 years ago

Not a “diet” suggestion per se, but I found a class at the gym called “butts and guts” taught by a totally hilarious wackjob and the combination of the name and not wanting him to think I’m a quitter by not going back every week has kept me motivated and has helped me drop some pounds. Also, I drink obsessive amounts of water, so whoever said that I totally agree with because it fills you right up. That and air-popped popcorn. Because I phenomenally suck at organized diets.

Graciemay
Graciemay
15 years ago

About losing weight…….I’ve tried them all includeing Weight Watchers at least 4 times. The best one I’ve found is ediets.com. I need someone to tell me exactly what to eat and ediets does that. It has (at this moment) 23 different meal plans to choose from. So if you don’t like one you can change to another. It gives you menus for a 7 day period. You can switch the meal to something else if you don’t like what it picked for you. It gives you recipes for each meal and a shopping list so you know what to buy to make the meals. It does everything but buy and cook the food for you. It also has fitness plans and on-line support. I think it’s comparable (and maybe even cheaper) than on-line Weight Watchers. Check it out.

Graciemay
Graciemay
15 years ago

I really do know how to spell “including” — no e.

Another thing about ediets I forgot to tell you. The best I ever did on ediets was when I joined a “Challenge” support group. There were several teams and you got points each week for sticking to the plan, for doing so much exercies, etc., and after totaling the points for the week one team was deemed the winner. It was fun motivation.

Graciemay
Graciemay
15 years ago

Crap, now I mispelled exercise. I quit.

biodtl
15 years ago

Weight Watchers works for me. I lost 40 pounds a some years back and recently lost 35. Of course, I lost my mind and gained some back, but I;m back on the program. Of course the eat less/exercise more thing works, too, but I need the extra motivation of having to get my fat ass on a scale every week. I can lie to myself, but not the WW lady (not that she’s not nice and supportive, because she is). And the online tools are great, too.

ang
ang
15 years ago

I HATE the word diet. What I did to lose 35 pounds, was to survey my shopping cart before I checked out at the grocery store: Fruits-check! Veggies-Check!! Yarnell’s Death by Chocolate Ice cream! yeah, put that back. I figure if I didn’t bring it home, I wouldn’t eat it. Also, I started doing Taebo about three times per week. Restaurant calories totally don’t count unless you eat out more than once a week!!

Betsy
15 years ago

I’ll throw in for Weight Watchers, too. Lost 25 pounds and have kept it off. And the online tracker stuff totally appealed to my nerdy side.

Ang
Ang
15 years ago

Oh man, I’d be screwed it they had to “evaluate” my house before agreeing to clean it!