I wasn’t going to get a flu shot this year, mostly because I am a giant pussy and the memory of last year’s post-shot achy upper arm (what? IT HURT LIKE HELL DAMMIT) still lingers, but at my last OB appointment the friendly nurse drawing blood for a test asked if I wanted to go ahead and get the (mercury-free) injection at the same time and I couldn’t think of a good non-wimpy reason to say no, thanks anyway, I’d rather do something less painful to my arm, like whack it fifty-seven thousand times with a meat tenderizer.

For whatever reason this shot didn’t hurt at all afterwards, and I instantly felt both virtuous and impervious to disease. Foolishly, I assumed that one injection would have the power to keep me snot-free throughout the long winter months, while all around me people were felled in droves, hacking and sneezing and futilely gnawing at zinc lozenges.

This is why I am totally pissed off that I’ve had the same damn cold for DAYS AND DAYS ON END over here, thanks to Typhoid Riley. I got the shot! I’m supposed to be the picture of health, not a consumptive shadow-eyed mucus machine trailing disgusting little piles of kleenex wherever I go. I CALL BULLSHIT.

I will also note that my son and husband, neither of whom received a flu shot, have merrily bounced back from this shared virus and I—the only one fortified by anti-flu fairy dust—am the one that still sounds like a phlegmatic elephant seal.

(BULLSHIT.)

Adding to my general feeling of goopiness and malaise is the weather, which has turned from snow (pretty!) to a nonstop aggressive downpouring of rain (sucky!). I mean, it’s not like rain is exactly an anomaly here in the Northwest, but this is a deluge of the build-the-arks variety—on each of my (eight thousand) lumbering trips to the bathroom last night I could hear water cascading from the skies and smashing into our house. Our rain chain that hangs outside the bedroom window has been jangling frantically, totally overloaded and tinkling a desperate little oh dear oh dear chime.

So while I ponder my cold-symptom-relief choices (Mucinex, steamy shower, lustful piglike rooting in leftover Halloween candy stash) and the rain transforms Seattle into a traffic-snarled swampland, distract me from the dreariness, will you? What’s the one thing you would like most this holiday season, and I’m talking selfish materialism here so no “world peace” type answers allowed. If you could have any boxed-and-wrapped present this year, what would it be?

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Stephanie
14 years ago

I linked from Swistle, so no naked heiney methods of finding you here. But I want to play the I get anything game.

NEW CAR, NEW CAR, NEW CAR!!! ME, ME, ME!!!!

Seriously, I drive a 97 cavalier with 155,000 miles on it. Don’t I deserve it?

leenie
14 years ago

joining the chorus— iphone, for sure.

crossing crossing crossing my fingers (!)

Ali
Ali
14 years ago

Ok, so Lawyerish’s comment is AWESOME. And makes me look like a selfish ho when I write what I want, but…
I want a personal trainer. Tall, dark, and kickin’ ass. Someone to yell at me at ridiculously early hours of the morning and pull my butt back to its upright position. (Can you wrap that really, though? You can cut little holes in the wrapping paper for him to breathe if you want…)

Good luck to you Lawyerish! We’ll send good thoughts your way….

Elizabeth
14 years ago

I would like for my baby to sleep better at night. But I would also like to find some way to put her first birthday in January on hold, maybe rewind the clock a little bit, or somehow just bottle up her baby-ness because I am suddenly so sad to see her becoming less baby and more toddler.

Oh, and an affordable house in the bay area.

Alex
14 years ago

A thingamabob that will allow me to listen to my iPod in my car. And new yoga clothes are always a plus.

Moose in the Kitchen
14 years ago

1. Someone (preferably a hunky someone) to design my web site and blog for me so I won’t be admitted to the ER for dehydration after all the bitter, salty tears I shed while shrieking “WTF, CSS?”

2. a diamond-studded cashmere pony

Jem
Jem
14 years ago

Clothes. (sorry, boring)

chellebird
chellebird
14 years ago

I want a camera just like yours. My parents said I should just write “pony” on my Christmas list instead, as it was just as likely. Sigh.

Heather C
Heather C
14 years ago

What the heck is a “rain chain”? This must be a Seattle thing. We’re having serious snow here at the moment, and it’s very slippery outside. I fell crossing the street to get coffee.

What I would like for Christmas:

1) a Cuisinart Griddler,

2) a Kitchenaid stand mixer,

3) an iPhone (not available in Canada),

4) a laptop,

5) a new kitten (my old one is past warranty)

6) my own home, so I don’t have to live under the Elephant Twins upstairs anymore

Caleal
14 years ago

Someone to pay off all my student loans.

What? You can’t wrap that?

Well. Then enough diamonds to hock to pay off my student loans. :)

honeybecke
honeybecke
14 years ago

Sorta-maybe-kinda realistic:
I’d like someone to wrestle up all the art prints and expensive portraits we’ve purchased and get them framed for me to hang on the bare walls of my new house.

Not-gonna-happen-but-I-can-dream: Two weeks in Tuscany. Sans squiddos.

Hope you are up to your full-snacking strength soon!

tracing
14 years ago

Wow this is a fun thread… and I now I feel extremely greedy because I want everything everyone else said!

And yes, good luck Lawyerish.

My one to add… not exactly boxed and wrappable, but I would really like to put a gas fireplace into our house.

Audrey
14 years ago

My husband and I really want a wii. Of course, we failed to mention this to anyone who might purchase it for us until it was far too late to hold out any hope of getting one. Our second choice? An external hard drive. Holy crap are we ever geeky.

Gwen
14 years ago

In my dream world, I’d like the next 2.5 years of law school tuition and fees (which is like $150k, eep). But if we’re talking physically tangible, I’d like a bicycle, and with it the ability to get over my complete terror of riding it in traffic. Or the Nikon 18-200 VR lens for my D80.

rakel
rakel
14 years ago

That our offer on the apartment of my dreams gets accepted!

Josh
Josh
14 years ago

First off, I’ve never heard of a rain chain before. I looked it up. They are wicked cool, which I assumed because you are always super hip and with it long before I even know there’s something to be hip about. So yay for you and your stylish gutter alternatives.

If I could have one thing this Christmas, it would be to not have to go serve time over the holidays, and maybe get a weekend alone, or even a few hours alone with my woman. but, I’m pretty sure I’ll be locked up by then, so if I were to get one thing that I could use when I get out, hmmm, I don’t know. I haven’t even thought about Christmas yet. A grizzly bear would be pretty cool, or a nile crocodile. I’ve always wanted throwing knives, and I don’t have a chainsaw. I could use a computer for sure, so I don’t have to do mortal combat with my brother to pry him off of Myspace which I foolishly introduced him to. I think a tattoo would be a pretty sweet x-mas gift. Maybe a tattoo of Dita Von Teese riding a mechanical bull that’s really a keg of beer, topless! Hell yeah. Nun chucks are cool, but I’d probably just break my own bones a lot. I don’t know what I want, I never really do, just something dangerous and manly. Like a trebuchet. Or a human skull. Or a trebuchet decorated with human skulls! Are you feeling me? That’s pretty awesome huh!

Melissa
Melissa
14 years ago

I would like a trip to Mexico and a nanny to bring with us. Because if I don’t bring the little one I’d worry and want to have some quiet time with my husband. Yeah, I’ll continue to dream. :)

skiplovey
14 years ago

Sorry about the rain. We could use some of that down here in Southern Calif.
What I really want for Christmas is a new flat panel plasma t.v. Ours is about a million years old and I’d like to upgrade to at least the same decade as everyone else. Are you listening Santa?

jonniker
14 years ago

Honestly, all I want is for someone to buy our house. That’s all I want in the entire world, and I will forgo the holidays for the next five years ENTIRELY, if that one thing could happen within the next six months, at a reasonable price. That’s all I want. All. I. Want.

It’s so all I want that I can’t even fathom anything else I might want for even a second, seriously. All I want. HOUSEHOUSEHOUSEBUYMYHOUSE.

warcrygirl
14 years ago

I grew up in the desert (technically a desert, it is San Diego anyway) so I’ve no idea what a rain chain is. What do I want for Christmas? A new laptop with ALL the bells a whistles. Either that or thin thighs.

More eggnog?

Stephanie
14 years ago

Let’s see, where do I begin?

A new phone, money to pay off my undergrad loans and upcoming grad school, a necklace from Tiffany.

OH! And an engagement ring! From my boyfriend!

OH! OH! And a dog!

Bitter Betty
14 years ago

Black Kitchenaid Artisan mixer with flame decals.

Fuck yea.

Squeeky
14 years ago

Hmm, if I could have anything I wanted it would have to be a brand new shiny Canon EOS 40D Digital Camera. (see I’m already drooling)

Oh and a magical pair of boots that are waterproof, yet warm and fuzzy inside so I can wear them sans socks when I have to run husband to work on mornings when he can’t ride his Vespa.

Meloogal
14 years ago

De-lurking to participate! Ah, wanton materialism! I want:

1) PLANET EARTH ON DVD. HOLY. SHIT.

2) To be featured on whoorl’s Hair Thursday.

Barb
Barb
14 years ago

Sorry about your cold! We’ve had them here in Central Illinois for over a month now. Everyone I know has had it and it lingers and lingers. Yay, Mucinex!

If we had the extra money to blow, I would dearly love a Clavinova – it’s an electronic full scale piano and they’re wonderful. I would sound so much better! heh heh

Stacy
14 years ago

I want one of those microfiber hair towels. I have a dream that it might actually give me good hair … you know, having a SPECIAL towel just for my hair that is supposed to absorb four times more water than a regular towel alone.
Sheesh. I feel like a HUGE dork for writing that.
And, since I’m due to have a baby between right now and Christmas Day, I’m having dreams of seeing my toes again. But I guess you can’t wrap that, eh?

Trena
14 years ago

I heartily second whomever on the list said that they wanted their kid to sleep better at night. Seriously–I would be crazy happy if Owen would suddenly start sleeping by himself in his own bed for 5 hours at a stretch.

Also, I would really like a live-in housekeeper. This following a small person around only to pick up the same mess 8x in one day gets really really old.

Teralyne
14 years ago

I am lusting after a week in Jamaica man. I keep leaving brochures around hoping my husband will get the idea and think it came from his own head. This freezing rain, snow(pretty) has got to go atleast for a week.

I would even wait to go after Christmas so we don’t miss all the happy family stuff.

Swistle
14 years ago

“Anything” is too big! It freezes my brain with possibility overload!

I mean, can I have a house, a new house? Or are we talking “under the tree”? In which case I want to trick the genie by asking for a massive box of jewels that I can cash in to buy other things.

Well, okay, within reason: what I want most is L’Artisan’s Les Epices de la Passion coffret (contains a 15 ml bottle each of three perfumes I love: Safran Troublant, Poivre Piquant, and Piment Brulant).

JMH
JMH
14 years ago

dorrie-
I got the Roomba for Thanksgiving and now I want the corresponding Scooba for Chriatmas. Yes, I plan to have all of my cleaning done by robots :)

Amber
14 years ago

A bookshelf, a pretty one that matches my living room. AND a computer. A new, lovely computer free of evil Microsoft software so that I can amp it up with Linux. Ahh, bliss.

kalisah
14 years ago

I’m thinking about asking for a rain chain if I can figure out what the hell it is.

Jurgen Nation
14 years ago

Gaaah. I’ve never gotten a flu shot and this is why! It hurts like a sonofabitch and my luck is such that I’d get sick soon after. Or hit by a bus, take your pick.

I’d say that I want an engagement ring boxed up with a ribbon (preferably Tiffany blue *cough*), but I’m supposed to just be happy where we are and that we’re together and plus I’d rather get my new camera for Christmas and THEN the box with ribbon (preferably Tiffany blue *cough*) another time when I’m not expecting anything. SCORE! Every day should be “Give Me a Gift Day.”

I’m just saying.

Kym P.
Kym P.
14 years ago

The only thing I really want is for my damn house to sell in Tucson so that I can buy the house of my dreams here in the NW, despite this crap falling out of the sky right now. What the hell is this shit?

The other thing I wanted was a North Face fleece jacket…and DH already got it for me since it has been so cold here and he didn’t want me to wait until Christmas. I haven’t taken it off in a week now. :-)

Lesley
Lesley
14 years ago

A gene that would enable me to consume as many peppermint mocha frappucinos with whip as I want without gaining a pound!

Jennifer
Jennifer
14 years ago

Mac Mini with 2G memory. (I have the Screen/Keyboard/Mouse, the mini-body alone will be fine, thanks!!)

jen
jen
14 years ago

Well, it’s not world peace, so maybe I can get away with it… I really want to meet my Dad who I’ve just been reunited with after 25 years (I’m 27), and my sister, who I just learned exists.

But if anyone wanted to buy me a 1997 4Runner with a big red bow on top, I wouldn’t object. ;o)

She Likes Purple
14 years ago

1) a pair of J. Crew ballet flats that are on sale for $99 but are still TOO MUCH for us. And 2) a baby, which obviously you can’t wrap up (well, obviously you shouldn’t wrap up) and isn’t really a material thing, but it’s what I want most. And I really do think it would be just the best Christmas gift. So if we’re wishing, I’d like both the knocked-uped-ness and the ballet flats, please.

Julia
Julia
14 years ago

This weather? This weather is horrible. However, this weather has a silver lining in its cloud (har har har): local news is just that much more awesome!

I’ll take a new imac with a 24 inch screen, please. And then a really, really nice new lens for my Nikon. And maybe a new flash. What? I’d just be wasting my gorgeous 24 inch screen if I didn’t have awesome new pictures to look at on it, wouldn’t I? If that’s too much to ask, I’ll settle for the complete series of the West Wing.

H
H
14 years ago

Dream gifts: hybrid car, TiVo or DVR, Roomba, new treadmill, family vacation on a tropical island

Reality: iPod (Stephanie Brown: No, you’re not the last person on earth without an MP3)

I’m ashamed to admit I still use VCRs. Did you see that’s plural? To accommodate my TV habit, I have 3 of them.

jen
jen
14 years ago

i want someone to pay my 2300 in tuition for me next semester. throwing in the extra 400 for books would be fantastic too. ;)

Danell
Danell
14 years ago

Oooh, rain chains look cool!

I’m not really following the rules here either, but…for once I’d like to be able to pick out The Perfect Gift for everyone. Oh, and I’d like to be able to afford to do that, too.

Penny
14 years ago

an iphone with a free year’s subscription to ATT would be cool, but if it’s really ANYthing, I’d want it to be enough cash that I don’t have to go back to work next year :(

Erica
14 years ago

I want, more than any other thing, a new digital camera, preferbley an SLR of 8+mp. Alas, my hubby and I set a limit A LOT lower than that ($500+) for each other this year. Still, perhaps Santa reads your blog and will know that I have been a very, very good girl this year. :)

Amy
Amy
14 years ago

Dreams: An engagement ring, a house, a new car, and a dog. Ah domesticity.

Reality: Books, iTunes gift card, an IOU for, say 3 months, of not doing dishes.

Josh
Josh
14 years ago

Oooh, I forgot. Maybe two weiners would be sweet! I mean, even if I wasn’t very manly I would be twice as manly as the other half manly dudes I chill with. Except all the guys I chill with are super manly, just like me, so I would be twice-super manly. Hah! JB couldn’t jump my fence then! Cause it would be thirty feet tall and made of Christmas cactus! Not feeling up to it hombre? No I didn’t think so! Hah! No prickly death for you? too bad you one-weinered half-man! Hah! Santa loves me more, because my wish list is waaaaaay cooler!

In the Christmas spirit, “Eat it!”

Challenge put out: Can any man out there (ie: JB) out wish-list me on Sundry’s blog? Can you wish for something more manly than I can? I say the wishing is an open forum until Christmas Eve. I dare you. (*ahem* JB)

And what the heck is JB short for? Johnny boy? Me thinks so. Hahahahaha! Man challenges rock!

Lisa
14 years ago

My 2 1/2 year old has consistently asked for the following 3 things from Santa for about 2 months now:
-Chick Hicks (from the movie cars)
-a kitchen with his OWN oven
-a REAL baby….a girl one.

We’ve taken care of the first two items and Im really hoping that Santa is hearing the plea of this desperate 2 year old and that a baby is in our near future. Especially since we leave Japan in a year- I can’t be 38 weeks pregnant and trying to move back to the other side of the world!

Mandy
Mandy
14 years ago

I’d like a gift certificate for unlimited personal training sessions. And then next year, a new wardrobe for my new kick-ass body. Oh, and jewelry, of course.

julie Boyce
julie Boyce
14 years ago

A puffy sleeved nightie. They do not exist anymore, apparently. I have had a team of discerning shoppers on the look-out for the past few years, but without success… so I had to don the threadbare hunk-o-craaaap I wear to bed during our annual girls shopping spree. The situation is becoming critical.

As for the ‘exercise defeating’ weather, I couldn’t agree more about it’s general suckassedness. I haven’t done a thing since Thursday… first the snow and now the rains and unbelievably, after being -2 yesterday, it’s 14+ in Vancouver at this very moment! Craziness.

Hope you’re feeling fine soon Sundry!

Jennifer
14 years ago

Ugh. Feel Better. Colds have got to be the worst. Glad to know you are all okay and have not been swept away by mudslides or other random acts of nature!

I can’t say that I *want* a whole lot. My mother is another year cancer-free (SUCK IT, CANCER!) and my dad (who drives me batshit insane but I love him anyway) survived a bizarre, nearly fatal blood infection this summer. As long as my family is safe and sound and healthy, it’s all good in the hood.

BUT SINCE YOU ASKED…

Dreams:
– Tom Ford Black Orchid Perfume
– the ability to shoot a decent picture with my badass new camera (Canon EOS 40D)
– the two new Martha cookbooks
– Christmas Day without my mother-in-law or sack of shit brother-in-law
– a piece of that Sephora shopping spree action
– the infamous Box of Money to haul me out of the soul-crushing brokeness I currently find myself in

Reality:
– mama bought me THE Kitchen Aid mixer and it.is.heaven. Worth every penny.
– a card from the Walrus (mah husband) signed with his full name. Sigh.