So I have suddenly become weirdly obsessed with ringtones. Because, you know, it’s 2003? Honestly, I’ve always hated customized cellphone noises because I associate them with people who leave the ringer volume at eleventy-billion and take forever to fish their phone from their oversized purse while the entire coffeeshop/library/silently observant movie theater audience is treated to a tinny electronic version of “Mambo No. 5,” but I had to field a shit-ton of phone calls last week and I decided that I needed something that would grab my attention more than the warbly little Apple default doodle-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo I’ve had for years.

I started with Metallica’s “For Whom the Bell Tolls,” but while that is an exceedingly bitchin song, the ringtone version is a little … stressful. FUCK YEAH ANSWER THE PHOOOOOOOOONE *air guitar* Then I switched to AC/DC’s “Hell’s Bells” and that was cool for a while but you can really only listen to that dire opening bell tower gong so many times before your inherent phone phobia, assuming you have such a thing, triggers an undesirable Pavlovian response that I can really only describe as “My phone makes me have to do a poopie.”

I then switched to the Muppets’ “Mahna Mahna” because, well, cheery, right? Every time my phone rang the kids would burst out laughing! Ha ha ha ha MAHNA MAHNA! (Doot dooooo do do do!) But yeah that song’ll straight up make you want to kill yourself after a while.

Now my ringtone is the Game of Thrones theme, and it’s like the most epic phone noise of all time. Answer it … or impale someone’s head on it? IN THE GAME OF PHONES YOU EITHER WIN OR YOU DIE.

Anyway, I still hate talking on the phone, but now I sort of like it when the phone rings. Because my brain goes, ooh! Is it Sunday? Huh? Huh? Biscuit?

Tell me, what does your phone sound like?

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Laura
Laura
10 years ago

Right now my iPhone ringtone is “Empire State of Mind” by Jay-Z because I love NYC, but I’ve received some weird looks as I am the whitest housewife in the world so it is a little odd for my phone. I have recently become obsessed with “Battlestar Galactica”(because it is apparently 2003) and I am trying to find the opening theme ringtone. I haven’t seen it on any site I feel comfortable downloading from so I think I’ll have to make it myself.

Katharine
10 years ago

The bossa nova end-credits version of the Mary Tyler Moore theme song. I had to do all kinds of weird technology things to make it happen, downloading a sketchy MP3 and sketchy software and converting and whatnot, but it was so worth it. It’s not stressful-sounding, and it reminds me every time my phone rings that I’m gonna make it after all. My husband’s is the theme song from the A&E Poirot series, which seriously never, ever gets old, for either of us.

Jill
10 years ago

Intergalactic by the Beastie Boys. Awww yeah!

Amber
Amber
10 years ago

Oh, I am a dork about this stuff:

My husband’s special ringtone is the “robo boogie” breakdown in Flight of the Conchord’s Robot Song.

When he calls from home it’s the chorus of “Home” by Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeroes, which is maybe a little too on the nose, but I love it anyway.

When my best friend calls it’s the Super Martian Robot Girl theme song from Yo Gabba Gabba.

The general ringtone is a clip that starts at about 3:23 in this song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E7SSC3ex-bA

And all that for nothing because my phone is on silent 80% of the time.

Kristin
10 years ago

Well, in about 4 minutes mine’s gonna be the theme from Game of Thrones too! What an awesome idea! :)

tsquared2001
tsquared2001
10 years ago

The theme from The Godfather – the greatest movie ever made.

Megan
10 years ago

I had the old-school ringer sound at first, because it reminded me of the rotary-dial beast I grew up with (it was great, friends would come over and be unable to make calls). But I kept noticing every time I heard it that eight people around me would also dive for their phones (I have the same taste as everyone else, yay!).

So I swapped it for the whistled intro of Andrew Bird’s “First Song,” from Weather Systems. Very soothing.

J
J
10 years ago

Sister – Theme from Eastenders
Friends – Andy Cohen Theme from Bravo TV
Incoming Text – Recording of Wind Chimes
General ringtone – Soft Native American Flute

amber
amber
10 years ago

“it’s winter calling… to tell me it’s coming.”

Brenna
10 years ago

I change it up now and then, but my go-to ringtone is the Bones theme song, by Crystal Method.

Auntie G
Auntie G
10 years ago

I don’t have the factory-set option now and haven’t had the time (or skillz) to go out and download something similar for my current smartphone, but I’ve always enjoyed having a verrrrry old school rotary-sounding Brring!!! — in fact, more like the machine we would use backstage whenever a phone needed to ring in a play. It’s faker than a real phone was in the day, and always just tickled me (one time director and sometime actress) every time my phone rang. *sigh* I have no desire for a musical snippet or for spending time in cyberspace searching for something cool.

marilyn
10 years ago

I think I have the default, but I also almost always have my phone in my pocket so I leave it on silent!

More importantly, have you noticed that the credits on GoT change depending on where the episode is centered?!

Halyn
Halyn
10 years ago

Mine is currently the Imperial March from Star Wars. (Darth Vader’s theme.)I’ve previously had the original Battlestar Galactica theme,and like Kristin, in a few minutes, I’m gonna have Game of Thrones! :)

Brooke
Brooke
10 years ago

Mine is the “Closing Fanfare” section of the Baroque Hoedown (or “Main Street Electrical Parade Song”, as it’s more commonly known).

honeybecke
honeybecke
10 years ago

I am way more geeked out than I should be about my current ring tone, the Downton Abbey opening theme song. I looooove it.

Sarah
10 years ago

Tom Tom Club’s Genius Of Love. I’ve had to download it on three different phones now, but I’ve had it as a ring tone since I got my first cell phone. I will say, I usually leave my ringer off….but when I don’t, it always makes me smile.

Nicole
Nicole
10 years ago

Fitting title- mine is currently Raffi’s BananaPhone! Usually, though, my phone is on vibrate all day because I’m in class. Prior to Raffi, I used the beginning of Elevator Love Letter by Stars.

FWIW, my text tone is the 4-note Mockingjay tune from Hunger Games.

Kristina
Kristina
10 years ago

Nice! My ring tones (all 3 of them) got wiped out when I upgraded my phone’s operating system and I’ve been too lazy to replace them. I previously had what was a top-selling ring tone in India at the time, and I really liked it, but have no idea what it actually was to replace it. I’ve been reading the George R.R. Martin books and we just finished watching season 1 on Netflix, so I’m going to copy you and get a new ring tone. thanks!

Danell
Danell
10 years ago

Mine is a chicken clucking. Except when my husband calls-then it’s a donkey.

ZestyJenny
10 years ago

What app are you using to get all these on your iPhone?

Boring old iPhone default here.

Michelle
Michelle
10 years ago

A few years ago my car was totaled, and dealing with all of the calls between the insurance companies and repair shops and car dealerships, I had to change my ringtone to something that didn’t make me want to die. I chose the theme to the original 8-bit Mario Brothers (the one playing in your head right now), and all became right with the world.

saly
10 years ago

I just have the canned oldschool ringer. But on one of my very old school flip phones, in the height of Arrested Development, it was Asia’s “The Final Countdown” which was awesome. I miss that ring tone.

Jessica
Jessica
10 years ago

I love watching the Game of Thrones opening clip, but it also kills me a little bit because it is almost 2 minutes of the show! I also feel the same way about the True Blood clip. Get on with it, HBO!

My ringtone is Lady Gaga’s Telephone for general calls and K$sha’s Tik Tok for my boyfriend, I have no idea why.

Melissa
10 years ago

Ringida ding ding dong! Ringida ding dong don! Ding dinga dinga dong! It’s the geico ring tone from that commercial awhile back. I still love it. And I didn’t mean to type DONG so much. Sorry.

Sarah
Sarah
10 years ago

I used the Muppets song too and eventually had exactly the same reaction. Very fun, until it wasn’t. I am currently using Old Crow Medicine Show’s version of Wagon Wheel.

Aubrey
10 years ago

I’ve actually got Mahna Mahna as performed by The Fray from the Muppets Green Album. My kids laugh every time it rings and yell, “Muppet phone!” So far, it’s not bugging me.

MRW
MRW
10 years ago

Oh my god, I had no idea they offered GOT opening as a ring tone. Off to tell husband immediately!

My ring tone is a boring old school telephone sound because I found I’m incapable of having the pavlovian response to answer any other noise. Pathetic.

Stephanie
Stephanie
10 years ago

I totally love you for using Metallica as your ringtone

bibliogrrl
bibliogrrl
10 years ago

My GENERAL ringtone is the chorus to “The Best Ever Death Metal Band Out Of Denton” by The Mountain Goats because who doesn’t want their phone to start singing “HAIL SATAN! HAIL SATAN TONIGHT!” whenever it rings?

Melissa
Melissa
10 years ago

Heh, I used to have Bananaphone as my ringtone for the longest time. Then after that, it was this. (Apologies for the ad-laden Hulu link.) Brb, gonna go download some of the ringtones in these comments.

Erin@MommyontheSpot
10 years ago

I need to jazz up my ringtone. I used to have Obi Wan Kanobe say, “These aren’t the droids you’re looking for.” But it couldn’t compete with constant background mayhem of Dora the Explorer or Fresh Beat Band.

Anonymous
Anonymous
10 years ago

General Rings- Carry Out JT and Timberland
Hubby-Kiss Me Through The Phone Soulja Boy
Bestie-Paul Revere Beastie Boys

Carole
Carole
10 years ago

Rolling in the Deep – Adele

tanya
tanya
10 years ago

Solsbury Hill by Peter Gabriel. I’ve had it for over a year and haven’t gotten sick of it yet. Of course my phone is on silent 80% of the time, but that’s neither here nor there.

tanya
tanya
10 years ago

p.s. I adore you. Thanks for being awesome.

Angella
10 years ago

I told you this already, but I once had the Wonder Pets song. “The phone, the phone is ringing!”

After watching the A-Team remake, I had it as that for awhile.

I’m back at Marimba.

If Ryan Gosling had a song, I would change it to that, for sure.

Nicole
10 years ago

My phone currently sounds like the opening refrain of “Shook Me All Night Long”

For awhile I had the Hockey Night In Canada theme song (if you’re Canadian, you’re not really unless you know this) and then for awhile I had a Yoda voice saying, “An Incoming Call You Have”

E
E
10 years ago

When my husband calls from his cell: Falling Slowly (original)
Everyone else: Chasing Cars (Snow Patrol)
Sometimes: the theme song from Iron Man.

E
E
10 years ago

Several of the guys at work have the Kimmunicator beep (from Kim Possible) for their text messages alert and I want it very much badly for mine but I haven’t found a compatible version yet.

Becky Mochaface
10 years ago

I actually have different rings for the people who call me most often… my husband, mom, sister, etc. But my ringtone for when anyone else calls me right now is Robyn’s Dancing On My Own http://youtu.be/CcNo07Xp8aQ

Deanna
Deanna
10 years ago

The Sabre Dance by Aram Khachaturian. It’s a bit obnoxious, but I’m from buffalo and a big hockey fan, so the song fits. Also, no one else has it since I don’t I’ve in buffalo anymore! (my boss has the muppet “Mahna Mahna” song and I literally want to throw her phone out the window every time it rings….)

Angharad Baber
Angharad Baber
10 years ago

Also the Game of Thrones tune! then specific people have: theme from KickAss, Explosions in the Sky’s ‘First Breath after Coma’ (just the crescendo-y bit) and Broken Family Band’s ‘Living in Sin’.

Jaime
Jaime
10 years ago

I go between KYlie MInogue’s SPeakerphone and EVanescence’s Going Under, depending on my mood. I also have the Sex and the CIty theme too.

Melissa
10 years ago

My ringtone is the old-school Super Mario Bros. Theme. Because it’s actually 1989 ;)

Tripta
Tripta
10 years ago

Set fire to the rain, by Adele. It doesn’t really matter because my phone’s on silent half the time, and the other half of the time I’m deaf. Seriously, I can never hear it ring.
Perhaps I should change the ringtone to something a little more emphatic/loud, but I hate answering calls so this works out fine for me :)

BKC
BKC
10 years ago

I had “American Boy” by Estelle until it got so popular that I kept trying to answer my phone fifteen times a day when it was on the radio. Then I had “It’s Okay to Not Like Things” but it rang when I was picking my kid up from preschool and I got LOOKS. Now unknown callers get a instrumental version of “A Whole New World” and people I know get my brother playing and singing “Somewhere Over The Rainbow” by Bruddah Iz.

Oh, and my text message sound is Minnie from The Help saying “mmm-hmmm” but I’m totally copying Nicole and changing it to Rue’s whistle.

Victoria
10 years ago

I too am curently ring tone obsessed, had Mana Mana for a while, but then thought maybe I should be grown up (ha!) and now have a lovely Cello type thing that’s all mature and lovely.

Ironically? I keep my phone on silent almost always.

Oh, and I had to turn off the “IT’S SO FLUFFY I COULD DIE!” text tone because I had it and it went off in my car and I nearly crashed because I didn’t know who was talking to me.

Ahem.

Mo
Mo
10 years ago

The intro to “Lonely Boy” by the Black Keys.

Melanie
10 years ago

Generic tone – “Vibrate” – Rufus Wainwright
Home phone – “Home” – Bonnie Raitt
Husband – “Power of Two” – Indigo Girls
Ex from college – “Mixtape” – Butch Walker
Two best friends – “My Friends” – Dar Williams
Another friend – opening riff from “Blister in the Sun”
Yet another friend – mp3 of her saying “No…I have to have the clap!” which was an outtake from a video shoot – she was responsible for the little “Scene 2, Take 2” clap board thingey.

Clearly I need a hobby.

Suzanne
10 years ago

My phone rings like a phone because I am not smart enough to figure out how to download something as awesome as the GoT theme. But I just read your whole post out loud to my husband and he promised tomorrow he would get me Game of Thrones so now I am JUST LIKE YOU. Now please send me some of your eyelashes.