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Sep
24
In order to deal with my crabby state of mind this week, I have taken the following actions:
• Baked various things featuring white flour, sugar. Took turns licking giant spoonfuls of uncooked dough with Riley.
• Booked a hair appointment. Fuck you, roots.
• Hired my smart web coder friend to help me build a new website that is going to be so totally awesome I swear to GOD you guys.
• Watched this video, like, a LOT. Ditto this.
JB’s parents leave tonight and I am bummed. It’s not that I wish they, you know, lived with us or anything (!), but they have been home with the kids while I’ve gone to work and Riley has been so incredibly HAPPY as a result. I leave in the morning and they’re all having fun, getting ready to go for a walk or whatever; I get home at night and the kids have had their dinner and Riley’s chattering at me like a cracked-out squirrel about how he and Grandpa made a FORT, come look RIGHT NOW MOMMY.
I’m sure JB’s parents are more than ready to get back to their normal, non-baby/3-year-old-centric lives, though. It’s probably been a rewarding, but exhausting few days for them — I can personally attest to the fact that caring for two small children all day long is, well, a real bitch sometimes. They think I’m insane for putting Dylan in a swing to sleep and so they’ve been putting him in his crib all week, and he’s responding by not napping for shit, so they haven’t even had any decent breaks.
(Oh man, I so don’t want to deal with the swing/crib issue. I know I’ve got to just cowboy up, move him into the crib and handle the fallout, but people, he just started sleeping through the night — he stays down from 7ish PM until 4:30 or 5 now. I feel enORmously whiny about a regressed sleep schedule, which is sure to happen, but of course I can’t stuff him in the swing forever. He already looks sort of ridiculous in there, like a Sumo wrestler driving a Mini Cooper.)
I’m going to take the kids to daycare tomorrow so I can run some errands and finish my freelance work for the week, but I’d also like to take a few hours to pursue the act of Chilling the Hell Out. What would you do if you had a little free time to yourself, in order to help de-stress and recharge your batteries?
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88 Responses to “Happy place”
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Cry - you know, a good chemical release of stress. Then, have Jamie Zeppa’s book about teaching in Bhutan in my hands instantly, magically, instead of across town through loads of traffic at the bookstore. And then maybe book + bubblebath in silence.
I spent the day (out of the office at least) ripping out moldy sheetrock and insulation from a home damaged by Hurricane Ike, and now I’m home and hungry with a headache and the dogs won’t be quiet and the husband isn’t home yet to give me a hug because he was almost in a car accident and so is talking to the police somewhere on some road. So I can’t be mad that he’s home late.
Dude, check out Flight of the Conchords on youtube. Especially the Robot song (the humans are dead! binary solo: 00001111, 00001111!!) We sing it to our 3 month old and she bounces in her Jumping Joey to it: guaranteed happy place material :).
Nap nap nap then nap some more. But knowing me I wouldn’t be able to turn my brain off so I’d just lay there THINKING about napping. Sigh.
I HAVE TO KNOW:
Where does Dylan nap at daycare?
We take our daughter to an at-home daycare and the woman is great but also the PUSHIEST BITCH ON THE PLANET, and she magically got our daughter to take 2 hour naps in her crib, BUT she’s always giving me other advice.
So. Anyways. Just curious.
Free time. Hmmm. I think it might involve wine. And goat cheese. Followed by a nap.
To get a few minutes to myself, first my three year old would have to be surgically removed from my ass because (said in ominous whisper) I am never alone.
I would first just enjoy the silence. The freedom of no one saying MOMMY-MOMMY-MOOOOMMYYYYYYY. Cast around a bit, see where I misplaced my sanity. Then I might do something crazy, like read entire SENTENCES without being interrupted. Go to the store (any store!) *alone*.
…I mean motherhood is WONDERFUL and I would never want to spend ONE MOMENT that’s not in the company of my precious snook’ems. Er. Something like that.
Go for a run….the winter will be here before you know it….run, blast your ipod….take some scenery pictures…..then come home and throw in some netflix, after a hot shower(and btw….get yourself some great takeout for lunch!!!)
Mani/pedi for sure…
Or better yet…Watch a movie uninterrupted.
Enjoy your chill out time!
My all-time favorite “just chill the fuck out”, “leave me alone I need a minute to myself” activity is napping. Not very creative, I know, and I don’t even have kids…but my god, is that not the best luxury in the world???
Running is good. So is napping, if you’re that kind of sleeper. Even when sleep-deprived, I just end up spending minutes/hours staring at the ceiling, but I know some people (I’m looking at YOU, boyfriend) can pretty much sleep on demand.
Maybe just make yourself a nice comforting snack, and curl up in bed with that and a book or comic book — or a DVD? If sleep comes, so be it … Relaxing, either way.
Ummm, so many things I would like to do! Get a massage or a mani/pedi. Sleep a bit, read, go to the gym (maybe) and just get a few things done. Enjoy!
I’d sleep. Somewhere. Anywhere.
go to hoa and get a mani pedi! they are the absolute best and then you can go get a cup of coffee down the street and relax. as a matter of fact, i think i might do that myself while the man watches football with the kiddo on sunday.
Go to a movie!! I miss that so much. My kid has been asleep for over an hour, and I’m stuck to the computer like some kind of freak, reading all the mommy blogs and facebook crap. Why do I do this to myself???? Insanity brought on by motherhood. That’s the answer.
Mani/pedi or a facial, if you really want to splurge.
Also meant to say that our pediatrician told me that once they start to sleep through the night the napping will begin to fall into place. Sounds like BS to me but maybe Dylan just needs a little more adjustment time and then it will get better…not sure if that makes you feel any better! :)
I’ve been all about Gossip Girl from Netflix…but that’s the most embarrassing thing I’ve ever said aloud. I don’t know what it is about “pretty people with problems” that just sucks me in.
And, seriously, this definitive decline in the weather this week is SO worth the white flour and sugar and cookie dough off a spoon. It’s made me all kinds of crabby, too.
(Fuck you, Fall. Seriously, I mean it.)
a long walk, some kind of giant iced mocha type thing, and a massage
Re: the swing — there’s still time to move him to the crib later. Do what gets you all sleep for now. For us, our babysitter magically got babyB to nap in her crib. Once we realized she was doing it, we tried it at nighttime and lo and behold it worked! But I wouldn’t rush it.
If I had some spare time, I’d go with DH to see the newest Batman movie in IMAX — tomorrow is the last day at the theater near us. We just haven’t made it yet. DH might go tomorrow (next to last day at a job he’s leaving and they’re screwing him out of several days pay, so he may just take the afternoon off) but I can’t spare the time this week.
Go, have fun, and tell me how it was!
Pace around, getting precisely NOTHING done because I’d have No.Fucking.Clue what to do with myself.
3 words: Book. Couch. Chocolate. Ahhhh.
But I also second the going to a store (doesn’t matter which one) withOUT a child, a cart, a list, a budget… (well, I can dream)
Or go to a movie that *I* want to see.
Enjoy your downtime!
* a run (pray for less drizzle, go enjoy the leaves turning)
* hot bath to celebrate
* new magazine plus a treat that makes me feel good (huge, sweet plums and dark chocolate)
* shopping for one feel-good splurge for me
* a brain-dead dvd under huge, soft covers and a good nap
***notice I used all “me’s” instead of “you’s”…so you wouldn’t feel judged or whatever. :)Enjoy!
I would stop at a coffee shop for a cup of coffee (or five) and maybe sit and read for a bit. Or maybe I’d head out with my camera and go somewhere and take a shit-ton of photos. Of course there is always shopping. Or a movie. Whatever you do enjoy it. You deserve it.
Go for a walk. Sit in a bookstore and drink coffee and read a book. See a movie. Nap. Get a manicure or pedicure. Go window shopping. Relax!!
SPA: facial; massage. Lunch someplace yummy, doesn’t have to be fancy, with “reading” material, like People Magazine. A movie? Aimless shopping at the mall?
lovely bath followed by mani/pedi..topped off with a yummy coffee and a magazine! And hell I’d toss in a quick run to the store WITHOUT KIDS.
Get a coffee, then wander up and down store aisles aimlessly, just looking at stuff. Do a bookstore, or the mall, and people-watch or browse. Get another coffee, repeat wandering.
I played hooky from work the other day and left the kids with my mother-in-law. Then I went to Barnes and Noble, browsed the books and magazines for awhile, picked the ones I liked, then sat in the coffee shop with a tall nonfat toffee nut latte and read an ENTIRE magazine in peace.
Such a little bit of heaven, there.
You are so damn lucky to have such wonderful In-Laws!
If I had some baby-free time, which I have not, in oh A YEAR! I would just leave the house, probably go grab a coffee and sit at a book store reading (us weekly- lets not get ahead of ourselfs) or go shopping for something just for me, not for the kid or the husband. I really don’t know, I would be lost if I suddenly had a sitter and a few hours, I think I may have forgotten how to be by myself…. strange.
I would go get a haircut, facial, and pedicure. And then I would go browse a bookstore for as long as I wanted and pick out the perfect new book and go sit and have a chai and a sweet and read uninterrupted.
I would likely indulge in a little of all above suggestions: Wine a-plenty, while soaking in a wonderful bath (of wine, possibly)simultaneously reading a fantastic “can’t-put-it-down” that I can only put down when Flight of the Conchords is on (it really is riotously funny….did you also see the one where Jemaine and Brett buy leather suits? That shrink? )Then shopping, and chocolate, or shopping for chocolate, and finally a mani/pedi if you can find a pedicurist (?!?) who wont hurt you (I cannot.) Enjoy.
I would sleep or book a massage. Either way!
Nap, haircut, massage, de-clutter the house, take dog for a long walk/jog, spend an hour and a half at the gym, get a pedicure because I haven’t one since December 20th LAST YEAR, and finish it up with another nap.
1. Good french-pressed coffee that will stay hot until I finish it (unlike the luke-warm crap I have to drink in the morning chasing the kids around).
2. Hard hard run.
3. Sephora
Go for a nice long, peaceful walk somewhere beautiful and quiet.
Or, erm, sit around in my undies watching tv and eating all those things I’d been a-bakin’ all week.
Either a chick-flick movie at a theatre and lunch with a friend OR a take-out lunch at home with a good book or a DVD. Either way, a big glass of Malbec would be on the agenda.
Chilling the hell out for me would be an afternoon matinee at one of the deluxe cinemas with a large pumpkin spice latte (’tis the season). If I had such an opportunity I’d probably see Ghost Town with Ricky Gervais of The Office and Extras fame, because he’s one of the funniest people alive - his stand up is to die for - and the movie has gotten very good reviews. Otherwise, a stroll around the seawall with a good friend followed by dinner at a favourite Thai spot.
When I have free time, I chill out with a couple of friends called Ben & Jerry. If I can’t do that, it’s with Ciao Bella brand Blood Orange sorbet.
And if no frozen concoctions are available, a good book, a quiet room, and a snuggly puppy do the trick. And maybe some cookies.
1) Run 2) Massage 3)Hot bath 4)a great snack in bed while watching a good movie - and if you happened to fall asleep all the better.
I usually go to a movie by myself, so that I can see what I want and show up on time! Sleeping is good too. I also like hitting Ross for cheap clothes. I have to add that my niece slept in a recliner in the living room until she was 4! She’s 17 now and sleeps in a bed like a normal person. Give yourself a break. You’re awesome!
I can’t wait to be your friend on Facebook. Swistle + I are buddies on there, she even sent me a virtual plant on my birthday.
I didn’t know this before, but the other day I was Googling “flat spots” because my daughter (Dylan’s age) had 2 one on each side of her dome. I read that letting babies sleep in swings makes them develop/become worse. See, I always put her in her swing for her 2 daily naps, crib for the night. Ooooops.
I say if Dylan’s head is pretty round then let sleeping dogs lie if it’s what gets you through or maybe stick his swing in his room near the crib to slowly transition.
I like meandering around Target, Ross, thrift shops + Sephora or having my husband pop my toes on the couch.
You know, simple shit.
I cannot stop watching the second video. It’s… beautiful?
Because of this, I’m going to suggest that in order to relax you should go out and buy yourself some flesh-colored dancing shoes and put together an elaborate routine. Make sure to include a part where you break it down.
Massage. Pedicure. Wine (or maybe gin and tonic). A book I would actually get to read. And, of course, a nap. Mmmm…
Drink something tasty, watch an old movie, read a good book, and go for a long walk. While I love having a fresh haircut, I’m surprised so many people find the actual process of getting one’s hair cut so relaxing that they list it here. What is going on at the salons, people?!
Lady! I recommend because I know you’re a friend of it..an hour MASSAGE. It won’t command the afternoon so you don’t have to feel guilty not getting “other stuff” done. And OH it feels so good the way other me time doesn’t.
Go, go have your day!
Go see ‘Burn After Reading’ with a bag of popcorn and a large diet coke. You’ll laugh out loud which is always good for the soul…
surf porn
Oh that Pete is so….male!
I’d go to thrift stores and/or to garage sales and find treasures aplenty.
I’d find the optimal route from my house to the Target that is opening soon (finally!) in our town. Then I’d drive through the parking lot looking at all the pretty red carts waiting for us. This is Momentous.
I’d start planning Girltrip 2010 for me and eight of my closest oldest friends. Hawaii? Cruise? Oh man, this is gonna be the shit.
I am so happy you got some alone time. Your in-laws are awesome.
Go home, make a giant yummy salad with all the yummiest freshest ingredients - match it with grilled salmon and eat it in piece, then go out to nearest coffee shop and get an espresso coffee and giant piece of choc mud cake, take it home and eat curled up in bed watching a great DVD.
See? I haven’t had peace in so long that I can’t even spell the darn word…
God- an hour long massage always makes me forget how much husband and child are driving me nuts.
Go get a pedicure. That’s my total cure-all for when I’m beyond stressed. Mind you, I almost never do it… but I ALWAYS feel fantastic when I do. If you can fit in your hair at the same time, more power to you - I am always in a better mood when I feel polished. :)
If I had free time I would go to Target and just stroll around without my 2 girls screaming, crying, grabbing stuff, etc. Then I would take a nap..a nice long 4 hour nap!
Oh my stars, SLEEP sleep sleep. And then roll over, rearrange my blanket, and sleep some more. Cripes, I’m surprised I’m not asleep at my desk right now.
I’ll have to copy Amber and say that anytime I have a free day I usually end up at Barnes & Noble. I know Amazon is cheaper, but it doesn’t give you that great atmosphere of soothing but cool music, the smell of coffee brewing and happily walking up and down the aisles to physically pick up the books with their pretty glossy or matte covers and watching my budget fly right out the window when I bring home that big green bag of happiness.
Another video to combat a crabby state of mind :) I play it whenever I need to laugh myself out of a funk
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1iUU6jTqB6k
Disclaimer: it is extremely amusing, but there is a very good possibility that the song will be stuck in your head for the next few days.
I am so tempted to say a long bike ride. (I did that yesterday after only having time for short rides recently and I felt great).
But in reality, if I were you, I would spend the entire time mindlessly surfing the internet or - if I had cable - watching chick flicks. No way would I tackle anything productive.
I think I’d go to the gym or to a movie. I am not kidding when I say I am getting a little teary at the thought of having a choice like that!
Couldn’t tell you what to do to recharge your batteries - but re: your in-laws starting the migration from swing to crib…..
SWEET!! Your now playing with house money!!! DOUBLE DOWN!!!!
Take the effort and time that they have put in to overcome the inertia of what we all seem to think to be the right solution (and I think that includes you ) of getting him to sleep in a crib. BUILD on that effort and momentum. Keep the consistency going. You’ve been given a GIFT of having someone else start the process - the hard work is done. Now its essential that you keep that consistency, and let him see that you too intend on him napping and sleeping in a crib.
Perhaps he is just holding out for them to return from wherever the heck they and their crazy assed idea of sleeping in a crib came from, and is just waiting for you to come sweeping back and put him back in the swing….
Stick with it. The process has already begun. Do whatever you need to do to rest up and psych up for what no doubt will be a difficult start for you to this new process, but something that he is MAJORLY involved in now. Catch up to him.
He’s probably wiped, and would like nothing better than a good nap. Once he sees that you too are in the same “napping in a crib” boat, his need for nap will hopefully soon takeover his need to scream and holler and not nap - and then before you know it, you’re home free.
Also, I found with my kids that when they napped in their bed, it resulted in better sleeping in their bed at night. Its a consistency thing.
Don’t you dare undo what progress has been done. So help me God - I will remove you from my Blog-must-read list, and I really enjoy your writing, so if not for your sake, or your son’s sleeping habits sake - do it for me. Stick with it. Tremendous progress has been made thanks to your in-laws. The majority of the work is done. You’re in the home stretch.
Rest up. Stick with it. Open some wine in a few short days to celebrate.
Take a shower, read novels naked in bed, perhaps with a yummy snack.
In no particular order:
Yoga
Massage
Trashy TV
Read
Enjoy the silence
Pedicure
See a movie ALONE. (don’t have to share the raisinets that way.)
Also, I think Jeff above needs to chill out a little, himself. Just sayin’.
I have a lot of free time right now because I’m due in February and I am trying to soak up all the “me time” I can manage. But what I’d LIKE to be doing with that free time instead of chronically napping and/or watching horrible television is writing a gazillion thank-you notes I am behind on and cleaning my house top to bottom. The motivation is just NOT THERE and, seriously, when does the nesting thing happen. I’m 19 weeks and just patiently waiting for the energy to tackle more than toasting bread.
Now, no yelling at me. Have you tried putting him to sleep in his crib on his tummy? My daughter had the same issue. She would sleep in her swing, but not in her crib. My aunt (she’s a nurse) told me she’ll probably sleep on her tummy. She sleeps from 7pm- 6am. Just an idea. Please no yelling, it worked for me!
Oh my Lord - I cannot thank you enough for sharing that 2nd video. It seriously changed my week. How awesome is it when the guy freestyles??? HILARIOUS!
I sit on my fat ass and watch TV or play on the computer. Doing absolutely NOTHING is what makes me feel better when I’m worn out from the kids. And heaven forbid one of them makes noise after they’re supposed to be asleep, I get PISSED. Not at them, just in general since I’m ON all day long and when it’s chill time I want to chill, not see the lights on the monitor stay in the red zone.
My apologies if I went a little psych-obsessed earlier. Just trying to keep the momentum going, build some motivation, etc…
And, I’m battling with having had too much coffee this morning…
And I have three kids…
And….
I would go see a crapload of movies and eat my weight (and my husband’s) in popcorn and Dr. Pepper. I’d even put that Vaseline-esque butter on the popcorn and not feel bad about it.
Oh, and I’d take a shower real slow-like. I miss taking leisurely showers and taking my time in the morning. It’s now all about getting up at a ridiculous time so that I can hopefully be somewhat put together before Mister Man wakes up.
Sigh.
Get a pedi, take a nap, read a book, go see a movie, have a delicious lunch by yourself, go on a run… anything that you love!
Easy - I’d go to the gym. I’d take my favourite class and then maybe hang around to try something new as well. Then I’d take a long, hot shower and put product in my hair instead of a couple of tacky metal clips to keep it off my face. Oh, the luxury!
HOLY SHIT, HOLY SHIT, HOLY SHIT! A new website? Which is totally awesome? You promise? Dude my nipples just got hard, that’s how excited I am. (Yeah, I’m having kind of a slow day, so I’ll take my excitement where I can get it) And that renewed mind video was just about the funniest retarded christian thing I have seen in a while, and I just found Godhatestheworld.com
If I had spare time to chill out, I would … trying to think of something that you could actually do that doesn’t involve drinking or the sex since JB won’t be around … I would go buy some fireworks and make one giant explosive with which to pull a prank on your loving and unsuspecting husband. I don’t know if explosion pranks are relaxing for women, but I dig them. Or you could make a fire in your back yard and roast some meat on a stick. Or go out for karaoke. Or shoot pool. Or drive around town and throw handfuls of gasoline covered pennies at hippies. (the gas is just to damage the environment while you pelt them with high speed metal, and to cover the stink of patchouli and BO) Or my personal favorite, poke a little smot, eat a retardedly large meal of whatever you like, I’m assuming grass sprouts with bran dressing or something along those lines, and then when you’re stuffed and sleepy, take a nap somewhere you normally don’t, like a recliner or a hammock. (I realize it might very well be arctic in Seattle by now, but here it’s comfy) And the best part is that when you wake up all full and rested wherever you lay down, you can turn the radio up full blast and take a dump in the other room with the door open so you can hear the music. Also I find walking around with no pants is relaxing. I’ve practiced my very own pantsless weekends, much to the dismay of my room mates, but whatever, they were just mad they didn’t think of it first.
I’m dying to go for a run. My baby is one month old, and I haven’t run for almost a year. My poor husky is missing it, too.
I’d also bake or cook something complicated, which is not happening around here now.
I like the suggestions for Sephora, too. Retail therapy is always good.
I’d head for the bookstore, grab a pile of magazines and books and leaf through them with a large coffee for a few hours. have fun!
Hit the fanciest boutiques in town! Nothing refreshes like a stroll through Chanel or Frette ….not necessarily to buy…it’s just nice to be surrounded by pretty things.
My recipe for a few hours of mindless relaxation? Small popcorn, no butter. (My God, is it not fattening enough without butter?!) Red vines. Sprite. Really good movie. IN THE THEATER!
I agree with not letting the initial shock of the crib placement go to waste (btw…how often do you have to change swing batteries?!?!!?). Yes, you may have to go through some whiney, oh-my-god-would-you-please-go-the-f-to-sleep moments, but there’s just no avoiding it, and eventually he is going to get too damn big for the thing.
A thought on easing the crib transition…maybe try sticking a pillow under the mattress on one side to give him the sensation of there still being an incline? I actually was sleeping my son in his car seat for the first few months (he was just so happy there), and ended up trying it as part of the transition. I think it really helped, and I still sometimes stick one in there if he has a bad cold.
But I’m also not one to talk…my son is 11 mos old and still wont go to bed on his own. I still rock him every night, and at this going rate could be doing it til he’s heavy enough to crush my legs beneath him! : ) Good luck.
Добродетель есть не что иное, как внутренняя красота, красота же — не что иное, как внешняя добродетель.
Seriously, if I had a day without my 3 and 1 year old boys running around, plus an absent horny husband (WTF is his problem?), I’d shower for an obscene amount of time, then give myself a nice pedicure and manicure, then maybe clean the house a little, and finally end the day with a good movie (like Sex & The City, or the Bourne Trilogy) and my cross-stitching. I seriously want to start my sewing and stitching up again, but that’s impossible with mini-men running around using me as frackin’ ladders and trampolines! Even when they’re sick, they’re hyper as heck, so unless the hubby removes them from the premises, I’m screwed!
Sorry about Dylan not sleeping great yet. My second didn’t really sleep through the night until I weaned him at 11 months, so I was a zombie for that long. Even now, when he’s 20 months, he gets night terrors and wakes me 1-2 times a week screaming. I seriously hope that after a certain age my kids decide that sleeping more than 7 hours a night is great! Mommy wants more zzzz’s!
Spa day!!
Not that I have EVER done that before.
APPARENTLY I waste loads of time when given the chance. I gravitate towards trying to take a nap, leaf through fashion magazines and tearing out pages that inspire me, drinking tea, watching TV, light housework, pitiful attempts at working out. Oh, and being stressed out or worrying about stupid shit. That’s what I do in my free time.
Shower, throw on pajamas, make a big bowl of hot spinach and artichoke dip, catch up on All My Children in peace, and continue my guilty-pleasure reading of Flowers in the Attic. Oh, boy, that would be Heaven.
I think I wet my pants while watching those videos. What in the name of all that is holy???
So I clicked what I thought was going to be a video clip (after seeing the laugh aerobics) but only see some churchs’ website. Pray tell what do I click on to help ME adjust MY crabby state of mind? Pleeease. I need it…
Просто замечательно - очень интересные мысли
[…] I am putting Shaggy Boy in the crib, but most nights he falls asleep (*ducks*) in the swing. I know, I know! Terrible idea. Just ask Linda. I can’t help it. I NEED HIM TO SLEEP PEOPLE. […]
банально канешна, но респект за диз
Free time= Adult conversation!!!!….need I say more.
Find the nearest adult and have a meal that doesn’t included food fights, spit up and drool. It’s suprising the difference some adult conversation and behavior can have on your soul, if only for an hour :)
Гнездеть не камни воврочать - может хоть кто-то вдумался в текст поста всетаки реально?
Народ, где я смогу узнать про хостинг? Я тоже хочу писать такие статьи. Просто прочтя, я подумал - а вдруг и у меня получится не хуже?