You start with a baby harp seal, which you hunt through the ice of eastern Greenland or the chilly Magdalen Islands with your double-barreled shotgun.

seal

(Are they . . . gone yet?)

So anyway, how about the weather? No really: Seattle is in the midst of Snowpocalypse ’10, or as our local news has been referring to it—usually via infographic while airing footage of some poor reporter shivering on the side of the road somewhere saying “Yeah, it’s totally cold as fuck, back to you Jean”—ARCTIC BLAST.

A little snow can do a whole lot of damage in Seattle, and I’ve never been so grateful to have my commuting days behind me. Yes, I may be getting slobby and (more) socially inept and frankly, kind of fat, but thank god I don’t have that shitty drive any more. Yesterday’s icy streets resulted in a horrific traffic nightmare that trapped hundreds of commuters, like my friend Mona, who was on a bus for five hours trying to get home, and my former coworker Kristina, who spent a jaw-dropping 11.5 hours stuck on I-5.

Nearly twelve hours with no water or bathroom, you guys. I just saw 127 Hours and I was like, KRISTINA TO SAVE YOURSELF YOU MAY NEED TO DRINK YOUR OWN URINE ALSO DO YOU HAVE A KNIFE.

Seriously, I feel so bad for anyone who got stuck in yesterday’s mess. What a crazy situation, and after just a few inches of snow, too. It worries me to know we live in an area that can be completely and utterly gridlocked like that—in a natural disaster, there would be no way to leave unless you had a spare Blackhawk helicopter stored in the garage.

In other words, Seattle = zombie chow.

The upside of the snow is that it’s beautiful and the boys have been loving it. Today I bundled them up, stuck them in a sled, and dragged them down the street to a park where a bunch of kids were sledding, and man, if that wasn’t one of those parenthood File: Save As moments. Riley went down the hill again and again and again, just wild with joy. Dylan rode with me, hooting “WHEEEEE!” in my ear. Just perfect.

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Comments

58 Responses to “Winter wonderland”

  1. Jenine on November 24th, 2010 8:58 am

    Wondered about you all in Seattle yesterday. Good timing with your getting out of the commuting rat-race! Here’s a video we were all watching at work yesterday. That’s some slippery pavement — woof. The sledding sounds ideal. I love that about parenting, more opportunities to go sledding.

    I didn’t read the elk post comments but enjoyed your follow up.

  2. MRW on November 24th, 2010 10:07 am

    Yeah after last winter when Portland got a surprise (small) snowstorm and I attempted to drive home for four hours and then returned to my office, put on my running shoes, and walked the 4 miles home, I’ve decided that the second I see two flakes of snow together while at work I will take some work and go home. People completely freak out with snow here. Sigh.

  3. Beekeebear on November 24th, 2010 10:41 am

    No, they aren’t all gone.

    As a vegetarian and animal-lover, I certainly didn’t appreciate your last post, but I didn’t do anything snarky. Nor did I leave.

    Just so you know. We’re not all that extremist. And you needn’t be either.

  4. thejunebug on November 24th, 2010 11:15 am

    Beekeebear, I don’t think she was talking about you. ;)

    My niece and nephew are ecstatic – it snowed in Eugene, and they don’t have any school. My poor sister!

  5. Jennifer on November 24th, 2010 12:47 pm

    It’s a little difficult to relate, considering it’s a sweltering 82 degrees here in Dallas today. But I can relate to the fact that when we do get snow and/or ice, the entire city shuts the fuck down. Freakin’ nightmare this metroplex is if a snow flake presents itself.

  6. Lesley on November 24th, 2010 9:30 pm

    Trapped on a bus for hours. Ugh! I think I’d rather trudge miles of snow hell. (Of course you have to be dressed for it and on the west coast most of us aren’t prepared when the snow hits.)

    I vaguely remember sledding and what a blast it was. I more vividly recall our basset hound sledding by herself on a saucer alongside all the human kids, her ears flapping like a scarf in the breeze. Funniest thing ever.

  7. Kim on November 25th, 2010 3:52 pm

    So…I hear that it’s snowing in Seattle, and so I think to myself, “Need to go to Linda’s site to see some awesome snow photos to get in the holiday mood.” Then, of course, I saw that. And like a train wreck, I couldn’t stop with the page-downing. Lord, have mercy, girl.

    But pretty awesome, too. And my husband LOVED it.

    Happy Thanksgiving!

  8. Anon on November 27th, 2010 9:22 am

    I love how you cut and run, Lnda. So mature of you.

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