October 4, 2007

My belly is, perhaps not surprisingly, growing. It now protrudes from the front of my body in what is starting to seem like a comical manner, and I feel like I should have a little red warning flag taped to my navel. At 21 weeks I don’t yet feel lumberingly huge, but things are definitely different. For instance, taking large deep breaths? Not really an easy option any more, unless I’m doing so in order to swallow the maximum amount of Haagen-Dazs Mint Chip ice cream.

Certain outfits highlight the belly much more than others, I’ve noticed. Remember when Katie Holmes was knocked up and there were all those rumors in the tabloids about how she was faking it with a stunt belly because Tom Cruise is a gay robot, and their proof was in the photos that showed her looking extremely pregnant one day, not so much the next? Or maybe you remember no such thing because you don’t read trashy celeb-whore magazines, FINE, but anyway, now I know exactly what was going on there, it was her clothes. I have a t-shirt that completely hides the belly altogether, and I also have a dress that makes me look like I’m about to give birth; it’s all about the maternity wear and whether it conceals or reveals. Plus, there’s the Gassy Factor. I’m just saying, a meal involving beans can totally contribute to the overall girth/circumference issue.

Pregnant bodies are completely crazy-looking. On one hand, I find them beautiful and amazing and downright glorious, on the other, my GOD. I sometimes just stare at myself in the mirror at night, marveling over the weirdness of having one body part that appears to be suffering from an extreme case of elephantiasis. It seems like I’m carrying higher this time, because my belly starts curving outward starting from the middle of my ribs, and basically without a lot of structured foundation garments in place that means my boobs just lie on top of my stomach like . . . well, like fleshy hors d’oeuvres on a bulbous pink serving platter. I know, I know, could I be any more sexy and appealing? Maybe if I talk about gas some more.

You’d think these body changes would be familiar to me, but I’m startled all over again by the transformation. It’s like feeling the baby move, I think I could be pregnant a thousand more times (well, not literally) and never get used to how bizarre it feels to have something kicking me from the INSIDE. I never sit back and think tender thoughts about the baby moving around inside my body, I always think of that scene in Alien.

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oregoncoastgirl
oregoncoastgirl
14 years ago

“more high”?

:)

Trina
Trina
14 years ago

Oh god! I always think of Alien also. I thought I was the only one. I always wonder how freaked out women were who were pregnant when that movie came out.

Barb
Barb
14 years ago

I can still remember how baby-kicking felt, and the last time I was pregnant was 27 years ago. It indeed was a glorious feeling.

Lisa B
14 years ago

Where are your pics of this pregnancy, anyway? I need visuals, woman, visuals!

biscuit
biscuit
14 years ago

I intend to Sharpie a jack-o-lantern face on my (then) 28 week baby bump come Halloween.

You could use more straight up bump pictures.

Jess
14 years ago

Having never been pregnant (but eagerly anticipating the time in my life when I will be), I am simultaneously fascinated and repulsed by your comparison of to that scene from Alien. My question is, what does it FEEL like? Does it feel the way I imagine that scene would, or is it at least a more pleasant sensation? Is it similar to any other sensation you’ve ever felt?

Jem
Jem
14 years ago

Ha, I just got back from the doctors office where I was reading an old magazine from when Katie Holmes was pregnant with Suri, and I was thinking “I wonder if she really WAS pregnant or if they adopted Suri” and then I come back to read your entry! Not that I’m a crazy gossip reader or rumour spreader either…*shifty eyes*

But I agree, having another creature inside you is so alarming but cool. I can’t wait to have kids for that very reason (probably not the best reason to have kids). I just want to know what it feels like. (like the person above me said, I just noticed!) Its lucky smoking pot or dropping acid isn’t recommended while pregnant, otherwise I bet you could waste HOURS thinking about that.

mandy
14 years ago

Too funny. All three of my pregnancies were completely different experiences. I can relate. I have two under two at home and I am glad I am done. My days are fun, I love it, but can’t be pregnant again!

TinaNZ
TinaNZ
14 years ago

The whole pregnant, giving birth, breastfeeding thing made me feel like I should be the subject of some nature documentary on TV. It just didn’t feel like the sort of thing a HUMAN would do, you know?

Jess: early on like bubbles of gas, later on, like you accidentally ate a football player.

Trena
14 years ago

I too loved being pregnant but spent alot of time feeling like a completely out of control science experiment. Looking towards the thought of being pregnant a second time is almost more nerve-wracking, only because you have a better idea of what to expect/fear/not look forward to.

And for the person above who wanted to know what it feels like: in the beginning, it was totally like a muscle spasm…just really concentrated. Later on, when he would lie across my stomach and push out with his feet and then hit his head on the other side, not as much fun. So totally worth it though.

Katie
Katie
14 years ago

“one body part that appears to be suffering from an extreme case of elephantiasis”

I don’t think I’ve ever heard a better description of pregnancy….until I read this:

“fleshy hors d’oeuvres on a bulbous pink serving platter”

I am still cracking up over that line. That really should be trademarked. HILARIOUS.

erin
14 years ago

What’s even more Alien? When you actually SEE an elbow or a knee roll across your belly. That’s downright scary.

I carried higher my second time, too. But I still had another girl. Those stories of being able to tell the sex by how high the baby is? CRAP.

Donna
Donna
14 years ago

Just like Alien. Exactly.
Totally worth it.
You look great!

Jeanette
14 years ago

I LOVED being pregnant..all 18 month of it!

JennyM
JennyM
14 years ago

Tshirt!

“Pregnancy: Glorious Like a Chest-Bursting Alien”

Christina
14 years ago

I think that being pregnant the second will seem like a whole thing to me. I was wholly unprepared to pregnant the 1st time and was so worried about odd minute details of things that really mean nothing that I did not pay attention to the actual pregnancy. I think if we were even to consider a second baby would I would be more aware of the pregnancy and that happens.

However, I can related to the mirror at night thing – I remember standing there looking at my pregnant self during various points and just being amazed at the elasticity of skin :)

Kaire
Kaire
14 years ago

My niece is due in about 6 weeks. Sitting next to her is quite an adventure because I never know when I’m going to see something moving out of the corner of my eye. A couple weeks ago we were at a b-day party when she grabbed my hand and put it on her stomach. I felt what sure seemed like a foot pushing against me. We watched a bit and saw the object (UFO?) slide across, pushing the skin outward. I’m not sure if it was a subtle message of “hey, getting crowded in here!” or merely practising kung-fu. Either way it was so totally cool to feel and see, plus it totally ooked her hubby out :)

*not had kids, not planning kids, love them but don’t wanna have em!*

LauraH
14 years ago

Count me in the people who thought Katie was not “really” pregnant because in People (I have a *gasp* subscription) they showed her three months pregnant, with the turkey timer belly button sticking out. I know lame, because it was my only piece of evidence. Let us all rejoice that I am not a detective.

And the kicking of my daughter made me naseous whenever it happened for two months until I got used to it. I had a hard time getting over the whole, there’s a thing inside of me! aspect. I was just a baby myself.

cheyenne
14 years ago

It’s funny because I was JUST thinking about this last night. About that part just before Kane goes crazy and spits the food out of his mouth; he gets really quiet and has this glazed far-away expression. It occurred to me that perhaps right before the baby alien started violently tearing through his abdominal cavity, it squirmed around a little, maybe poked one of his internal organs with a little baby alien foot. That look on his face…anyway, I can relate because I get that look a lot these days.

Shannon
14 years ago

I’ve been wanting to ask you and am hoping you will answer just because I’m curious: during your first pregnancy, you mentioned that the Andrew Bird “Mysterious Production of Eggs” felt like the soundtrack to your pregnancy since you listened to it repeatedly during that time. Do you have a soundtrack this time around?

wealhtheow
wealhtheow
14 years ago

My favorite is the leg snaking up under the ribcage. That never fails to be both uncomfortable and creepy at the same time. Still, I’m really enjoying these last few weeks of having my boy all to myself and feeling him move inside me. Right now it’s just the two of us, and as excited as I am for my husband to get some hands-on time with our son, I think I’ll also miss the intimacy of these days.

Eric's Mommy
14 years ago

Oh I miss all the weirdness of pregnancy. I loved it when I could see a foot or elbow poking out.

Sundry
14 years ago

Shannon: I really don’t have anything I’d consider a soundtrack this time, seems like I’ve been listening to an assortment of stuff rather than the same album over and over. Funny, the minute I put on that Andrew Bird I’m transported back in time . . .

hue
hue
14 years ago

Ah, so I’m not the only one. I recently described the feeling of kicking as creepy. And got a lot of strange looks. It is creepy! My insides weren’t meant to be pummeled!

Jen
Jen
14 years ago

Oh gosh! Mee too with the Alien thing. Finally! Someone who GETS ME! (That and the Witches’ Tit thing…)

Josh
14 years ago

He is a gay robot. That freak gives me the heebie jeebies. I could totally see him starting a cult and ritually killing people, or whatever the next step in complete insanity is after you leave the scientology station.

And once again I am really really glad I’m a dude. Cause the Alien thing has always creeped me out. In fact babies in general freak me out. But especially the thought of some football sized parasite distorting your body into it’s own personal cocoon, all the while latching onto your circulatory system to drain your body of nutrients, and using it’s super natural mind powers to manipulate you into eating whatever it wants. Hell to the no. I don’t want none of that. I have the same problem with trusting giraffes, but that’s a whole different psychic power phobia.

rebecca
14 years ago

At this point (I’m only a week ahead of you), I’m pretty much over the novelty of the science lab part. Maybe it’s because when you’ve already done this once, you know it’s wondrous and miraculous and blah blah blah, but hi there, I’d really like my body back AND to stop feeling guilty about the caffeine I never stopped ingesting and the spinach I never started.

Do I sound like a bitter, jaded second-time mom or what.

Deanna
Deanna
14 years ago

Heck yes to the Aliens thing.
Hubby got upset because after the birth of baby #1 I kept muttering an amazed (and slightly panicky freaked out-ish) “*that* was inside of *me*?” Finally he said “he is a he, not a that”. Hmmm, well, yes, but it was not inside of hubby and then expelled at maturation now was it? The craziness of creating and housing a creature inside my belly was and still is amazing to me on a purely scientific and detached kind of level.

Maybe I am a freak but I thought the very early movements felt kinda like when you get really turned on and you get the tingly, bubbly, tremble-y sensations way down low in the belly kind of feeling. The flipping and rolling I mean. Later the kicking is just plain weird.

Paige
14 years ago

Heh. I’m so glad you brought it up, because I thought I was the only one to think of my baby as an Alien, too. Then again, maybe it’s just us.

shy Victoria
14 years ago

Totally think of alien.