Nov
15
Reason #290583 I love Warren Ellis:
“Hi. I’m your host, I’m out of my brain with exhaustion, and I’m going to be seriously polluting your inbox for the next few days. Think of this email as a vast ethereal Mind Penis, spasming like a dying pig and hawking up great steaming discoloured bucketloads of Brain Semen into the tender womblike cavity behind your eyes. And when it gets too much, it will leak out of your tear ducts, and your friends will say, how is it that you are crying Warren’s Brain Semen?”—from his November 8 Bad Signal email newsletter, titled “Seriously”.
Is it wrong that I consider both Anne Tyler and Warren Ellis to be my personal writing heroes? I wonder what would happen if you got them in the same room. Other than the unholy rift in the space-time continuum, of course.
I have no good segue from that little intro, so let’s just casually move on to the subject of zombies, and my fierce, undying (HAR!) love for them. Zombies have been (feasting) on my mind lately, starting last Saturday night when in JB’s absence I happily settled in for an evening of 28 Weeks Later. Just me and a dark room and my giant belly and about an hour of wide-eyed pre-bedtime lock-checking.
That is one satisfying horror movie, I must say. I liked it when we saw it in the theater, but I think I may have liked it even more on a second viewing. I highly recommend it for the first teeth-grinding twenty minutes alone.
While 28 Weeks Later is not technically a zombie movie (Nerdy Zombie Clarification: they’re afflicted by the rage virus, they’re not dead), it kick-started my zombie-lovin’ heart, and I immediately started reading the first few collections of The Walking Dead, which is a comic a few of you have suggested. And now I am going to go broke collecting the whole damn series, because what happens next? I MUST KNOW.
I also read The Road, which kept me up for two nights biting my fingernails and blinking back tears and generally becoming way too involved in the story’s main characters. This is not a zombie book, exactly, but it involves a nightmarish post-apocalyptic world where some of the few remaining humans have become monsters, and there’s this man and his young son traveling the dying land, and oh my god it is so good. There is horror, and faith, and inhumanity, and love, and despair, and hope, and—listen, you should read it. Bring tissues.
Lastly, there is Fido, which is a sort of zombie comedy set in the 50’s. With Carrie Ann Moss. It is really, really weird, and sort of surprisingly non-sucky. I think I enjoyed this more for the nearly fetishistic attention to detail they put into the set designs than anything else.
Oh and ALSO, here are some cool zombie-related things some of you have alerted me to:
• Grody knitted brain purse!
• Zombie plate and mug set!
• Intramural zombie hunter shirt!
• Human meat cut diagram shirt!
• Zombie escape plan journal!
Okay, I think that concludes my periodic declaration of zombie-love. Until next time, remember: always aim for the head.
Comments
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My product review site:
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Just don’t watch the latest Resident Evil, it leaves you wanting. Wanting a plot line. Wanting more of your favorite characters to survive. Too much wanting.
Mmmmm Carrie Ann Moss. Is she wearing vinyl?
This is something you might like, although you might have to read the first stories to get this one. But anyway, it is a webcomic called Dr. McNinja, about a ninja…doctor. In this storyline he has to fight a bunch of ninja zombies who have risen from the grave to avenge their deaths…at the hands of Dr. McNinja! Also, there is the clone of Ben Franklin.
http://drmcninja.com/page.php?pageNum=1&issue=8
OMFG – I just PPV’d 28 Weeks Later the other day and loved it until Something Bad happened to the film’s resident hot ass. Aside from that I thought it was a great sequel as far as sequels go. I read something about a possible third installment set in Moscow – holla!
I am currently in the process of re-reading ‘World War Z’ and when I’m finished I’m pretty sure I’ll be able to fend for myself when the uprising eventually happens -and it’s GOING to happen, it’s just a matter of when and where . The Walrus is on his own.
I recently finished listening to “I Am Legend.” I wanted to read the book before Will Smith ruins it for me. Do you plan on seeing the movie?
In all of your zombie love, I will assume you have read World War Z, yes? If not, it will take your zombie love to a whole new level.
Dude, I just rewatched George Romero’s trilogy on You tube over Halloween. I actually had nightmares. Classic nightmares.
If you liked The Road, check out Swan Song by Robert McCammon. Available on Amazon, paperback……..
Julia: oh yeah, big fan of World War Z. I re-read it every now and then when I want to get freaked out all OVER again.
Cali: I read that book back in, what, middle school or something! I haven’t thought of it in years, thanks for the reminder.
my first impression was that you had written the paragraph in italics.
you could have.
Yeah I read it long ago, and in that genre (sp?) it remains a favorite.
BTW, totally non-zombie related question. I must know: How do you like your Iphone? I didn’t see anything on it at sundrybuzz, and now that the hoopla has died down, I’m considering getting one. Recommendations?
Sigh. I alerted you to the prisoners re-enacting Thriller on youtube. Or perhaps you’d already seen it?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hMnk7lh9M3o
Although, I have to admit I was a dumbass and posted it among many heart-felt comments about spirituality.
I demand a refund :)
Have you read the Zombie Survival Guide yet?
http://www.randomhouse.com/crown/zombiesurvivalguide/
My husband now works out and owns a pair of nunchucks. Swear.
“The Road” was a great book. Great and terrifying at the same time.
I just read The Road. I COULD NOT STOP READING! It was one of those .2 a.m…”just a few more pages”…3 a.m….”damn I’m gonna be tired in the morning” books.
Good read!
I’m too wimpy for zombie movies most of the time, but I had my neighbor draw these up for a horror-movie-buff friend who had a baby last year:
http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2273/1759/1600/zombie%20baby%20stuff.jpg
I love the human meat cut t-shirt!
It’s funny because the other day my husband and I were talking about zombies and I was all serious and told him “remember always aim for the head” then went on to tell him how you need to remove the head etc. etc.
When I went to see Resident Evil: Extinction, I thought of you (creepy! I bet you wanted to hear that), but I’d been talking about zombies for about eight hours at that point, and well, this is where I get most of my zombie-related stories. Anyway, I was walking through Tokyo (that’s where I am, coincidentally!) when I stumbled upon a display for Resident Evil: Umbrella Chronicles (What is with all of the RE? Seriously) where they showed about eighty bajillion ways to kill a zombie, or a zombie spider, or a zombie dog. What they left out of both the movie and the game, however, is the zombie infested with PARASITES (as per Resident Evil 4, har har), where when you shoot them in the head, it explodes, and what was the head turns into a giant, scythe-like eyeball-tentacle… thing. It’s quite terrifying, and definitely puts an unwelcome spin on battling the undead.
Sundry, I saw the Zombie Survival Guide 2008 page-a-day calendar, and naturally thought of you.
Also, I imagine you’ve seen Shaun of the Dead by now, right?
There’s also a very useful “In Case of Zombie Apocalypse” poster, as well as some good ideas for zombie-fying embroidery patterns.
You’d probably like most of Dan Simmons’ stuff, too. (He’s even got a zombie story, “This Year’s Class Picture.”) Try “Summer of Night” or “Carrion Comfort.”
It’s so good to have a group to share the zombie love with – my husband generally just thinks I’m strange. I love all things post-apocalyptic, however, and have since I read The Stand at some point in my early teens. Zombies, plague, vampire plague, mysterious happening, I’ll take anything that nearly wipes out the human race. Now that I type that, I realize I may have issues…
MRW: me too me too! Make sure to bookmark this page. : )
I was going to suggest Fido, as any red-blooded zombie lover ought to see it.
I was so confused when I first read this because as soon as I saw the photo, I thought your comment was going to be about one of my very favorite television shows — Damages. I swear, Rose Byrne had that expression on her face 90% of the time on Damages. If you like suspenseful dramas with lots of twists and mystery, I definitely recommend it. I just read that FX picked it up for two more seasons. I absolutely love that show.
Sorry to get off the zombie topic, but I couldn’t help it. Rose Byrne got me sidetracked.
I am SO glad you have started The Walking Dead. Isn’t it the coolest!?
Loves it!
If you aren’t already a member of the Zombie Squad, you really need to join! Do they have one in Seattle?
Zombie Squad? I didn’t know they had those!
There’s another comic that I’ve been enjoying lately: http://www.lastblood.net/main/
Oh, and I keep forgetting to say that I love the new banner!
Is it wrong that I was disappointed when I couldn’t find a pattern for the brains knit purse?
Zombie Squads are the folks who dress up like zombies and shamble around downtown areas and Apple Stores, right? Seems to me that Zombie Squads can only serve to confuse us and dull our response for the REAL zombie invasion.
This really creeps me out:
http://www.cracked.com/article_15643_5-scientific-reasons-zombie-apocalypse-could-actually-happen.html
Thanks for the mention! Also, you should take a look at our latest, Thriller Was A Documentary. xoxo
I saw these in a store and thought of you!
http://www.mcphee.com/items/11739.html
Glow in the Dark, Flesh eating Zombies Playset!
Wreak havoc on your sister’s precious diorama with this Flesh Eating Zombie Play Set! Each set includes nine 1″ to 3.25″ tall, hard vinyl zombies, complete with blank stares, gaping mouths, open wounds and missing limbs! Turn off the lights and they glow! Fantastic undead fun for the whole family!
Wait! You’re going to need a Zombie Defense Kit. Check it out!
http://m3.bestpicever.com/piles/?s=zombiekit
Sundry: we had a zombie march in my town over Halloween. It was mad cool. And as far as mad cool goes, I’m sure you have seen plenty of zombie scenes with birthing, but that picture you posted looks an awful lot like the beginning of one of those. You might want to keep both some bandages and a shotgun handy.