I feel kind of bad for slagging JB about his Vegas trip and insinuating that he’s a heartless bastard who never gives me nice things, when in fact he’s a heartless bastard who sometimes gives me very nice things indeed (and not just Muhdik, JOSH) (PS: HAAAAA).

Witness:

braceletpix.jpg

Those are two pretty pretty bracelets I got at Christmas, one with Riley’s birthstone (peridot) and one with Smalltopus’s (amethyst). Sure, that amethyst might end up being not quite 100% correct, depending on whether Small makes an earlier appearance, but no biggie. Before Riley was born JB gave me a lovely necklace with a sapphire for Riley’s September due date, then of course the boy went and arrived on the very last day of August, so we have a history of children screwing up their father’s thoughtful gemstone purchase. Somehow I have managed to deal with the burden of having a beautiful necklace with a funny backstory, so if STP ends up being a garnet baby, that’s okay.

(Although, memo to child: you are supposed to stay put a while longer, dammit, so Mama can have her much-looked-forward-to pre-baby spa day. Don’t make me show up in the hospital with chipped toenail polish, kid.)

In other news, I keep trying to come up with something other than OMG YOU GUYS I AM SOOOO PREGNANT to write about, but I can’t. Maybe because I look like THIS:

brownshirtpic_small.jpg

No more room for brain and thinky-type activities. All is Belly. Must do what Belly commands. Must . . . get . . . Haagen . . . Dazs.

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workout mommy
14 years ago

I think you look awesome! In fact, I definitely see bicep definition in those arms!

Angie
Angie
14 years ago

Holy moley, you look wonderful! I know you say you feel awful and cumbersome, but you for sure don’t look it.

Mrs. Breedorf
14 years ago

Ah, you are just gorgeous, my dear.

bouncy
14 years ago

You look wonderful and you make it look so easy.

:)

Kristin
14 years ago

Wow. You are ALL belly. You look astonishingly awesome. Where is your face bloat? Cannot believe you have NO face bloat.

Mary O
Mary O
14 years ago

And you still have on cute clothes! I always gave up and lived in sweatsuits that far into my pregnancies.

Pete
Pete
14 years ago

Wow, did you photoshop the belly? BTW, nice moulding.

All Adither
14 years ago

OMG, you are sooooo pregnant.

And so very pretty and polished.

janet
14 years ago

I have to say, other than the large belly, you are looking downright skinny everywhere else! Really, I mean it.

heather
heather
14 years ago

umm, you look AMAZING. for reals.

SJ
SJ
14 years ago

You look fantastic. Absolutely gorgeous. I would have died and gone to heaven if I looked as good as you do pregnant. I could have only wished….

Emily
14 years ago

Seriously, dude — your ass is smaller than mine, which is not fair. Go ye forth and eat as much ice cream as you damn well please. Also! Completely off the subject, but have you heard of a wonderful/horrible band called Crucial Unit? They have a 16-second song called “Nailgun Your Fucking Lips” that I think you might enjoy.

Yams
Yams
14 years ago

Wait just a minute , where is the bloated face, mommy arms and swollen ankles?? No fair!! Kiddin’ you look absolutely lovely.

Scott
14 years ago

I really hope “STP” sticks around as a nickname, because it is totally awesome.

AmyKatrina
14 years ago

Those sure are pretty sparkly things. He’s a thoughtful gifter, isn’t he.

Also, just visited that new site, and…Holy hullabaloo! I’d have dropped the whole gig after that brouhaha about dog. Kudos to you for keeping up a brave face. It’s so freaking obvious that Dog has it good.

On the side, when you got Dog, did the show-dog lady know how old she was? And how old is a retired lab? I want one!

Matt
14 years ago

You’re going to give my girlfriend all sorts of ideas with that jewelry picture. I can see it now…

“Matt, Sundry got TWO bracelets for Christmas, so where’s mine? *sticks out hand and puts on the pouting face*”

Also, it pretty much looks like you are completely normal but with a basketball under your shirt. There is now a distinct possibility that you are lying about the entire pregnancy, methinks. I won’t believe it until I see a picture of Smalltopus..:-P

ollka
14 years ago

See now, I want Haagen Dazs all the time, and I’m not even pregnant! And definitely not as good-looking as you. So for the love of ice-cream, will you please bloat yourself and become at least a little bit uglier? Thank you.

Jennifer
14 years ago

I know you are going to think I am totally lying about this, but I call Smalltopus “STP” in my head ALL.THE.TIME.

Love the bracelets – birthstones that are pretty AND affordable!

I’ll add another log to the fire by saying that I think you look great as well. You’re going to have to share your secrets!

Also, are you tall? You look tall. Tall and Amazony. I MEAN THAT IN THE NICEST WAY.

sooboo
sooboo
14 years ago

What are you doing in the White House? I think I see Lincoln’s ghost in the corner. I hear he digs pregnant babes.

Donna
Donna
14 years ago

Hey, ok, I’m assuming that you are using a tripod each time to take your picture, and if so, and you haven’t adjusted it, you have dropped. Are you dilated yet at all? (Is any of this my business?)
And damn, how do you look so good? You should have been totally modeling maternity clothes. You are only pregnant in front, and only at the belly. How the hell did you do that?
And now that JB bought the bracelet, stp will for sure be early!

Nellig
Nellig
14 years ago

Is it legal to look that good at this stage of your pregnancy?

Swistle
14 years ago

OMG those are sooooooo shiny!

Super Sarah
14 years ago

Yup, you look amazing, seriously! You could be the MODEL for pregnancy you look so good! Its hard to associate jimmy leg, heartburn, shortness of breath with your foxy picture. I kind of imagine you sitting around looking like the picture of pregnant health!

Jennifer
14 years ago

Oooh! Pretty! The bracelet AND you!

My son was due in November, I got whatever the November birthstone is in a lovely little ring. then he up and decided to make his appearance in October. And October’s birthstone is opal…that just didn’t seem fitting for a boy somehow. So the November birthstone it is.

Caleal
14 years ago

Seriously. If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you’re faking the whole pregnant thing, because you literally look like you just shoved a beach ball under your shirt for funsies. You’ve gained weight like *no where* else.

Pfft. I could only hope to be as lucky if I ever got pregnant! :)

wn
wn
14 years ago

WOW! I mean, you are HOLY SHIT pregnant..but you look beautiful…seriously!

wn
wn
14 years ago

PS – I might have stopped and gotten Haagen Daas last night on my way home from work…

Kaire
14 years ago

Ok, you are definitely one of those “all baby” women! No mush to you :) Pretty sparklies and garnet would go with those just fine …

Christine
Christine
14 years ago

OK, thing the first – you look GORGEOUS! Seriously, all belly and in shape everywhere else. You are still going to be smokin’ hot after this baby comes.

Thing the second – JB has very nice taste in the shiny stuff.

And three – if you don’t mind, what color is on your walls in that picture of you? LOVE.

To sum up, you look spectactular and your home is so fabulous I can hardly stand it.

Kari
Kari
14 years ago

Well, holy hell. There’s an impossible goddamn standard for pregnancy, particularly end-term pregnancy. I wasn’t a reader during your first pregnancy, but if you did it this stylishly two times in a row? Well, that’s just plain mean.

I can’t be the only reader who is excited for the birth, if only to find out what name you chose. I remember the post where you solicited suggestions and I thought I offered up the novel suggestion of Nolan. I now realize how remarkably unoriginal that was!

Jeanette
14 years ago

Pretty bracelets, pretty pregnant lady! You look wonderful.

Eric's Mommy
14 years ago

Lovely bracelets Linda!

You look lovely also, I wish I had looked as good as you at the end of my pregnancy.

Christina
14 years ago

You do look awesome. I only three months along and I do not look even near as good as you do! I am already swelling as we speak – my socks schmuck to my ankles leaving painful indentions and my face is getting rounder by the second ALREADY!!! Also, my arms have NEVER looked that good even when I worked out three hours a day! However, it does look like that baby is ready to come!!

Also, love the idea of birth stone jewelery. I might have to casually mention this to my hubby! My mom had a ring that had three stone in it when I was kid and she told me that each stone represented one of us – not sure if that is really why she bought it but I always thought it was super cool when I was kid (she eventually gave me the ring which I still love to this day!)

warcrygirl
14 years ago

Awww, how sweet! I have yet to get any birthstone purchase even though I have specifically asked for such when asked the dreaded “What do you want for your birthday/Christmas/Mother’s Day?” Anyway, you want a new topic, I just purchased Turbo Jam. I know you had great success with it, since I’m too lazy to look back through your archives tell me what you liked, didn’t like and what your expectation were (and were they met?).

BTW, you look GORGEOUS! I only wish I look half that good when I was ready to pop.

Colleen
Colleen
14 years ago

Oh man, quit being modest– you look GREAT!

Carrie
14 years ago

But, Dewd! Look how hot your arms are!

Michelle
14 years ago

Wow! You look fantastic. My belly is enormous and my ass seems to want to keep it company. Also? My feet and ankles. Um….pretty much I’m planning on creating my own orbit before kiddo number two arrives.

By the way….our kids have the same birthstones. And now I feel oddly stalkerish for bringing that up.

Becky
Becky
14 years ago

ok a couple of things….first…I change my date for STP’s arrival..I say Feb 2nd…second..you do look FAB all dressed up and such..and third…not that I am asking for one..but I totally know what you mean with the sweats and saggy boob sleep bra going on….and fourth…I know that no matter how much we tell you you look awesome etc…I remember that feeling towards the end..that it didn’t matter what anyone said I still felt like a blimp!

Operation Pink Herring
14 years ago

Birthstones have always made me feel bitter. Why does April get to be diamonds and January gets a crappy ruby-wannabe? For your sake, I hope STP can hold out until Feb 1! Amethysts are so much prettier than garnets.

Plus, as a compulsive January-born Capricorn, the thought of you having a bracelet with the wrong birthstone is giving me a panic attack. MUST FIX MUST FIX MUST FIX.

Pardon me, I must now go find something to organize.

Becky
Becky
14 years ago

Oh and one question for you…have you started getting the “please don’t go into labor here looks” yet? Like from store clerks etc?

FishyGirl
14 years ago

Delurking (because someone said I’m supposed to somewhere else?) and Good God, you look great. Clearly, that baby likes Haagen Daz because you? You aren’t showing any of it ANYWHERE. Oy. I’d have killed to look that good for any of my pregnancies.

Damn, woman.

Someone Being Me
14 years ago

I never really thought about the gemstone thing and luckily my husband didn’t either. Since my March baby decided to be a January baby. Maybe the baby will wait until just after your spa day to make an appearance. I had gotten a pedicure for my baby shower so luckily my toenails looked good when I had Bear. I actually did get several comments on them from the doctors and nurses (including the guys). I had a lot swelling so people were constantly checking my ankles. I may have looked like crap but by God my toes looked good.

Tracy
14 years ago

Dude. I didn’t look that good pregnant, and I was 19. But is it just me, or is STP hangin’ low. As in…you might be right about the early thing.

Pam
Pam
14 years ago

Good lord woman. Stop looking so gorgeous and completely sexy whilst being SO pregnant. You raise the bar impossibly high for the rest of us who are trying to achieve just a state of nondump-i-ness. And I’m not even pregnant.
You look AMAZING.
Post away about being pregnant!!

Leticia
Leticia
14 years ago

You are so cute! Definitely looks like Baby has dropped. It would be hysterical if he came on the last day of January.

Anais
Anais
14 years ago

Like everyone else has said, you’re ALL belly. You’re so lucky! You have no fat any where else on your body. AT ALL! That is awesome.

I have a bad feeling that when I get pregnant a few years from now, I am going to look like that giant marshmallow thing from Ghostbusters.

GoingLoopy
14 years ago

I like the purple/green combo on the bracelets…garnets with green would make them too Christmasy. Although I suppose you wouldn’t have to wear them together (it would just look cool the way they are). I also see no evidence of all the ice cream and cookies you claim to have consumed. Maybe Smalltopus is eating all of them and that’s why he’s ginormous. :P

Seriously, though, you look beautiful.

Christian ODell
14 years ago

First off, you look completely amazing.
Second … where did you guys get that chair? It is wonderful!

That would make the best open-air-park location shooting prop.

Jan
Jan
14 years ago

Believe me, you look great. When I was pregnant, I looked pregnant ALL OVER. Even my lips were huge and swollen. You look beautiful.