There’s one thing I can definitively say about weekends as a parent as opposed to pretty much every weekend I can remember before I had kids: they used to be too short, and now they’re always just a smidge too long. There’s usually a point during every Sunday afternoon where I look at the clock and think, you have GOT to be fucking kidding me.

Which isn’t to say we didn’t have a wonderful weekend, because we did—the weather was spectacular, and everything felt very summery. We’ve had a tent in the backyard all weekend and the boys (all three of them) are constantly tumbling in and out of it like delighted puppies, we visited the animals at the farm, we found an awesome new park with a vastly entertaining skate bowl, we traipsed through a festival on a hot afternoon and its baking heat and complicated quilt of foodbooth smells transported me back to every fair I can remember as a kid.

Still, after all that joyful exuberance there’s something about the knowledge that tomorrow is Monday that feels less like a woeful all-good-things-much-come-to-an-end tragedy and more like a thrown life buoy, juuuuust within reach.

Breaking news from the No-Shit Gazette: children are exhausting. They will grind you right into the dirt and keep on going, leaving your sad sack of oldmeat behind. I don’t just mean this in the metaphorical sense: I ran a 5K this morning and during the race at least four kids absolutely smoked me, loping effortlessly along like goddamned gazelles while I huffed and snorted and lumbered in their wake. I came home feeling like, hey, I just ran my face off (THERE WERE HILLS. I CANNOT ADEQUATELY EMPHASIZE HOW MUCH I DID NOT KNOW THERE WOULD BE HILLS) for 30 minutes, time to kick back and—but no, of course that’s not an option since Dylan and Riley never stop moving EVER, they just buzz around constantly like hummingbirds loaded on bathtub crank, and not for the first time I thought how great it would be if I could just siphon off an ounce or two of their go-juice. Tap those little mofos like maple trees, and chuck the Red Bull once and for all.

No can do, though, no matter how earnestly I try and hammer that spout into their foreheads. All I can do is try and keep up, and man, for having such shrimpy little legs, they sure can kick my ass.

snigsrunning

In conclusion: fantastic weekend, but whew, glad it’s almost over. How about you, do you hate Mondays with Garfield-esque intensity . . . or secretly kind of love them?

Comments

Subscribe
Notify of
guest

127 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Annie
Annie
15 years ago

I’m a SAHM… my life is one long weekend. I miss Mondays.

justmouse
justmouse
15 years ago

i hear ya! when the boy was younger (or even not so much younger, but going thru a very definate ‘asshole’ stage), mondays were a fucking RELIEF!! but now that he’s (mostly) self-sufficient, and the husband and i can go tootling around the city/countryside all weekend by ourselves, leaving the boy at home by himself without worrying about him burning the house down or somehow stabbing himself in the eye with a fork, geeeeez….weekends sure are SHORT!!

Jenny
Jenny
15 years ago

Totally get it. I lost my husband over a year ago, and for a while, weekends were AWFUL. (In addition to the grief stuff, of course!) They’re somewhat better now, but I still look forward with relief Monday morning, when my daughter’s nanny arrives at 8:00 AM full of energy and enthusiasm. Me, I head off to work feeling grateful for having survived the weekend.

Melissa
Melissa
15 years ago

I’m a SAHM and I can honestly say that the week days are frequently just as busy as the weekends. In fact, by the time Saturday gets here I’m thinking, seriously? Can’t I just have a little break? For my birthday I asked my family for an uninterrupted nap (which I sadly didn’t get thanks to my own little humming bird)!

Annie
Annie
15 years ago

*Routine you say? What’s that?* :P

Amy
Amy
15 years ago

I’m not a mom, but I am a teacher and I can kind of get where you’re coming from. Summers and weekends really throw me off—I’m always so tired from all the other “stuff” I’m doing. Plus, I’m a wee bit of a control freak, so routine is good.

Hilary
15 years ago

Word, girl. I put away the same stupid toys over and over and over again, and even though we went to beach and saw friends and got things done, I am SOO ready for Monday. They are cute but they will wear you down in no time.

Jennifer
15 years ago

I agree with Annie. I feel fortunate to be a stay at home mom, but every day can seem the same after a while. The weekends are great in the fact that my husband’s around to do a lot of childcare, but that means I’m running around trying to get the things done that I couldn’t accomplish during the week. I know that my husband gets up Monday mornings and starts a week of hard work, but sometimes I unfairly think he’s getting a “break” by getting to leave and concentrate on something else for a while. Which he’s not, of course, but the grass is greener yada yada yada.

Valria
15 years ago

Not a mom so probably shouldn’t even chime in here but just had to say. I hate Monday’s because I can’t stand my annoying, immature, lack of any personal boundaries, passive aggressive, unprofessional boss.

Ok, now that is out there I guess I start getting ready for tomorrow.

*Sigh*

Jillian
15 years ago

Congrats on the 5K! And I’d rather work and go to school at the same time (which I am) than be a SAHM anyday. It’s MUCH more work than what I’m doing.

marta
marta
15 years ago

Right now I want to cry come Monday morning but that’s cuz my job is kicking my ass. I’ve definitely been in that place where my kid was kicking my ass. The last month of my maternity leave was like that. I thought nature was trying to make it easy for me to leave my preshus baybee. (Did you go to Artopia? Not stalking, just wondering.)

haitian-american family of three

Well as a work from home mama I can say that I look forward to both sections of time-weekdays for the regular kid schedule of stuff and work at night and weekends for a slight leavening of childcare when my husband can answer at least a third of the “Whats that?” questions hurled at us at oh a billion times a minute.
btw we did go to Artopia (photos on blog) and while it was cool, WHERE WAS THE ART?? I saw maybe ten artists work.

Johanna
Johanna
15 years ago

Heh. Funnily enough, my facebook status this (Monday) morning is along the lines of “Woohoo, it’s Monday and I get to go to work!” (I have three kids and yes, it’s the ultimate ass-kicker. I’m a single mother, which doesn’t make things much easier, as well.)

jessica fantastica
15 years ago

Hey Linda you’re one of my favorite blogs but I never say much cause I’m one of those lurker people. I was wondering if you did something different with your blog or if I broke my reader (again)…I didn’t use to have to click thru to see your entire posts but now I do. Anything different on your end?

Erica
15 years ago

I am at at-home homeschooling mom (2 girls, 10 and 17). I wouldn’t change it for the world, but sometimes I think, wow – working (outside the home, before we had kids) was SO MUCH EASIER just for the simple fact that there was a change from day to day. There are times, especially in the summer, when I have to check the calendar to know what day of the week it is. Yeah, for me, monotony is the hardest part.

thejunebug
thejunebug
15 years ago

They’re too short for me. I work nights, so inevitably after I get home on Fridays I sleep for a few hours, wake up, and then go to sleep at night, thereby fucking myself over for the rest of the weekend. Saturdays are normal, but I usually wake up on Sunday morning around 9am and don’t go to sleep again until 10 or 11am monday morning. I’ve pulled this same 24-28 hour stretch every single Monday for the last five years. I’m kind of sick of it.

Zoot
Zoot
15 years ago

Can I just say that Annie is the reason why I look at SAHMs and think, “They had to be born with more patience than I was.” Because for my maternity leaves? I actually HATED Mondays b/c not only was it NOT a break but it meant my husband went to work and my load doubled. *sigh* Thank you, Annie. For being the woman I can NOT be without padded walls.

(And I’m not at all joking. I’m kinda glad the US doesn’t support and 12-month maternity leave on a federal level. 12 weeks was totally my limit. It would have gotten ugly after that.)

In short? Mondays are tiring and I dread them for that (4:30am comes SO EARLY) but for the reasons you stated? I don’t dread them THAT much.

Krissa
Krissa
15 years ago

@Zoot – no one is forced at gunpoint to take all that maternity leave! I kind of wish it was an option here. :)

I don’t have kids (yet), but the kid-watching stints I’ve done have taught me to just STFU about any parent being tired/tired of their kid(s). I don’t even know the half of it.

danielle
danielle
15 years ago

Like Annie, I’m also a SAHM so my life is one long weekend. But not in the “I’m in college so life is one long weekend” kind of way. The other less fun, always tired, Calgon take me away version.

I still look forward to Mondays. My husband goes to work so at least during the week I have one less person to pick up after!

Jules
15 years ago

I love me some Monday. Our weekends are great, but they always seem to be so packed. Monday is when we get back to routine, and I get back to getting my own stuff done.

Erica
Erica
15 years ago

I thought I was the only one who secretly loves Mondays. Thank goodness I know the truth now! Peace.

Sundry
15 years ago

Jessica: I haven’t got a clue as to why that’s happening! I didn’t make any changes, and I double checked to make sure nothing got set to partial feeds, but I see the same issue in Google Reader. It sucks because I HATE partial feeds and usually stop reading a blog if it switches to that format, but I have no idea how to fix it. SAD TROMBONE.

books
books
15 years ago

A little bit of guilt just lifted off my shoulders-I do the “is it bedtime yet?” clock check every Sunday afternoon. Nice to know I’m not the only one.

I also felt guilty the first time I left my wee Squidgey for a few days. Of course I did miss him, but stronger than my missing him was my NOT missing being woken in the middle of the night, getting up at 6 no matter what day it is, and worrying about how many ounce of formula he had that day.

That’s why I always enjoy your gleeful posts from biz trips-the fluffy hotel bed! the room service! and first and foremost-the blessed autonomy!

Joy
Joy
15 years ago

Hate Mondays. Hate them. Just hate them. I am a SAHM and Monday’s just mean another long week without dad to throw the kids around.

cagey
15 years ago

I love Mondays now that I am a SAHM. I view it as a fresh start to the week as I tally up all the things that need to be done. Odd, I know. But I have made it a point to still have a “work week” feel to my weeks.

cagey
15 years ago

Okay, I just read the comments and realize my comments may have come across as Sunny Sally. And, that bitch gets on my last nerve.

I do try to purposefully keep my M-F as “work” – that’s when we do chores, errands and all the stupid big box store runs. Weekends are kept for “fun” stuff. Keeping the two separate has gone miles in saving my sanity.

Like everyone else, though, sometimes the grind gets to me. But I had those days when I was in the “working” world, too and when I was in that world, I loathed every single Monday that was not a holiday.

Kristin H
Kristin H
15 years ago

Ah, you might appreciate this as much as I did.

Last year I was in a sprint triathlon, and while I was panting my way through the run, this young 16-year old boy went flying past me (in a triathlon, they write your age on your leg, presumably so you can really enjoy the knowledge of the geriatric grandpas who are faster than you). But seriously, this kid was cooking. And I was, of course, cursing him in my head as I chugged along.

But lo, what’s this, not more than one mile down the road? The same young buck, puking his guts out at the side of the road. HA! Slow and steady wins the race! Or, uh, slow and steady gets to finish instead of leaving breakfast by the side of the road.

Red
Red
15 years ago

Love-hate relationship. On the one hand they feel too short if Half-Squat is having a good weekend, but GAWD they feel looong if its been a whiner one and I watch the clock counting down till I can throw him back to daycare.
I found that part-time days of work, which I did for about a week, was the ideal for me, and would do again in a heartbeat. I was very much more productive working just those 4 hours a day (no spending an hour reading blogs, etc., ahem.), got some adults only time, and then I’d get to play with Half-Squat the rest of the afternoon or do some light housework while he napped. Bliss.

AndreAnna
15 years ago

The only Monday I don’t love is the Monday I’m currently having. The one where I call out of work AGAIN because one (in this case both) of the small children are puke-covered poop-covered listless piles of whining bones, praying that I don’t catch it.

Belle
Belle
15 years ago

My kids are long grown, but I can tell you that HELL YEAH I looked forward to Mondays. I think I regarded going back to work on Mondays as a chance to have a routine again. I do better with routines! (I also used to secretly hate summers but that’s another story!)

katie
katie
15 years ago

congrats on the 5k! once my boys get older i would like to get into them…anyway…i’m a sahm. i love the weekends bc there are people (my mom, sister, husband) around to help me. my kids are 11 months apart — 20 months and 9 months. i feel bad bc i cant do much with them during the week bc the little one cant walk, etc. but on the weekends we can get out more.

nonsoccermom
15 years ago

Ugh, I was saying that to my dad just this weekend! How much I look forward to Mondays where I can just sit at my desk and have a cup of coffee without having to jump up every 5 seconds to shout STOP! GET DOWN FROM THERE! DON’T DO THAT! GET OFF THAT! My dad just smiled knowingly.

I’m actually sort of dreading my upcoming 3-day holiday weekend. GRAH.

H
H
15 years ago

I hate Mondays and always have, even when the kids were little. Maybe that says something about my job.

Claudia
15 years ago

It’s Monday and I’m at work and….happy. Can that be? Yes. I will say, though, that it gets MUCH better the older your kids get. Mine are 5 and 8 1/2 and can OCCUPY THEMSELVES for long stretches of time. We got one of those big inflatable pools and I can just fill it up (no, wait, they can do that part themselves) and let them splash and I can go inside and read or futz on the computer for an HOUR or more without monitoring them. No one will drown though there might be a fight but I can ignore it unless someone needs a bandaid or gets their feelings mortally wounded (drama!). But, I do remember those long-ass weekends when they were smaller. My youngest stopped napping when she was 18 months so even the glorious nap time was gone and I was exhausted by Sunday afternoon. I feel your pain but say: it won’t last forever. Like most things about children. But unlike other stages, this is one you won’t miss.

Magnolia
15 years ago

Monday’s mean a few things to me. I am a SAHM too with a six month old and a 4 year old. Monday’s mean the beginning of summer day camp again for the big one and that’s a great thing..drops me down to one but the rest? eh every day is a weekend for me to

I can’t wait to go back to school in the fall!

pam
pam
15 years ago

oh god yes. how is it you are always writing exactly what i’m thinking? maybe because we have boys the same age (as dylan, i mean.) it’s freaking exhausting.

jonniker
15 years ago

Count me among the at-home mom set who looks forward to Mondays. I don’t know, something about not having to explain what we’re doing and why to another person is more relaxing than negotiating with my spouse over what we’re doing, when the kid is napping, and what we do between. I mean, I love weekends with the family, but Mondays are calmer, somehow.

Plus, when she naps, the time is ALLLLLL mine (all, uh, 20 minutes of it, but whatever), vs. the weekends, when her naptime is usually spent in the car as we shuffle from one joyous family activity to the next.

jen
jen
15 years ago

I am the opposite. I have never liked Mondays and I now really don’t like them since I’ve added up my little guy’s “total awake time” and found that he is awake at daycare more than at home, including the weekends (he is an early to bed, early to rise kinda kid).

However, on days when he’s got four molars coming in and a cold (yesterday), then yeah, I know the feeling of holy shit is it really only 5 p.m.?

Becky
Becky
15 years ago

I secretly LOVE Monday’s. Dude by Sunday mid-afternoon I am so spent it is unreal. Monday gives me the comfort of doing something I feel competent at…all while not chasing a toddler who is running at Mach 5!

Ashleas
Ashleas
15 years ago

Oh Mondays.. you mean the day that the workday traditionally starts on :D Gee! What I wouldn’t give to wake up each monday knowing I would work for five days and then have two days off to relax, do fun things and hey! I could plan weeks in advance, make dinner reservations at places where you have to weeks in advance (Cinderella’s Royal table!) or you know.. request some days off so I could have a 4 day weekend for something big!

Instead I get a new schedule every flipping week. Never the same. Never 9-5 and always something obscene like 11:15 to 9:30. And I can’t plan and because everyone else is on the same scheldule.. I can’t request days off easily because heaven forbid we get SLAMMED that weekend. At Pizza Planet. In Disney’s Hollywood Studios.

*Head. Desk.*

warcrygirl
warcrygirl
15 years ago

I’ve been a SAHM for 10 years and I’ve found that I don’t appreciate weekends like I used to. There have been times where I’ve forgotten that it was Friday and hey, shouldn’t I be all giggly and happy about that? Like Annie said, it’s all one long weekend. Once the boys started school I LOVED Mondays though as it meant I got a break!

patois
15 years ago

I worked pretty much full time when the kids were much younger, and I was usually relieved (guility, of course) when it was Sunday night and routine ruled the roost again. Staying home with them now, I still find the weekends more exhausing than the weekday days, even in the summer. Probably because we have rituals during the week days that we don’t get on the weekends.

Kristin
15 years ago

I love Mondays too. We pack so much into the weekends that we are all exhausted by around 4 p.m. on Sunday. I went back to work full time for about 3 months after my maternity leave ended and I hated it sooo much (especially Mondays). I couldn’t take being away from the baby so much. I was incredibly lucky to be able to switch to working three days a week (including Mondays)and that has made all of the difference in my life. Now I appreciate the time I have home alone with my son during the week, I love the weekends because my husband is there too, and going to work and pretending I’m an adult is a much more tolerable. Of course we now are completely broke because I lost about a quarter of my salary, but you can’t have everything.

Melissa
15 years ago

Absolutely. I long for weekends during the work week, because, well, no one wants to work really. But Sunday afternoon, I do exactly as you do, I check the clock and CANNOT BELIEVE I still have X hours left until bedtime. Unfortunately (well, actually fortunately really) I work from home, so even when the weekend is over…I’m still here, they’re still here, only the weekdays involve balancing work as well.

JennB
15 years ago

My favorite day is Friday – I “work from home”, kids are at daycare, I don’t have to come to work… Best. Day. Ever.

Tela
Tela
15 years ago

LOVE Mondays!

ElizabethZ
ElizabethZ
15 years ago

Monday usually isn’t my favorite – BUT – today – my 4 month old was up at 4:30am – took 4ozs, then again at 5am, took 3 more ozs, then 5:30am. WHAAAATTTTT ISSSS ITTTTT???? Then my 3 1/2 y/o twins got up at 6. I got dressed, threw them some cheerios, a banana and milk – started a thomas DVD (“the new one, with the mean train and the pink car”) in our bedroom, said goodbye to my husband still semi-dozing happily in the bed and was soooo happy to be able to go to work.

Mihal
15 years ago

love this… can I steal it? I mean borrow it.
Breaking news from the No-Shit Gazette: children are exhausting.

I was just saying to my husband as we put the 3 yo to bed around 10:30 due to a 4 hour nap… we go to work to rest.

1 2 3