May
27
I hate feeling like I need to clarify a post but it’s worse to come across in a way I didn’t mean, especially if it’s potentially hurtful. I keep thinking about the way I wrote this and how even the title has this vibe of “I let myself eat all the food and now I need to fix that because eating all the food is bad.”
This is in fact exactly what I was saying, but I want to emphasize that “bad” for me isn’t going above some holy grail number on a scale, it’s about disordered behavior. Treating food like an addict treats a mood-altering substance — because I am an addict and food is definitely a mood-altering substance.
It’s important to me to keep working on my relationship with food not so I can fit into a certain size, but so I don’t have to live in active addiction.
Everywhere I look lately there’s crappy diet industry messaging about losing the pandemic weight and man, I sure don’t want anything to do with that, so here’s a whole-ass follow-up post that no one asked for. Unraveling decades of diet mentality isn’t easy but being more thoughtful with words is so important for making things better.
I have been thinking about this type of thing too. There is such a huge difference between “This was a bad/good idea/pattern/feeling for me” and “I AM BAD/GOOD, FOOD IS BAD/GOOD, ETC.” And it’s so hard to communicate about anything having to do with that kind of thing, because there are so many layers/issues/implications/ETC. (For what is is worth, I felt like you succeeded in communicating it.)
I too feel like a huge step for me has been separating exercise from eating, and to keep up with the former even when the latter is hard to figure out. It feels weird to have that be A Thing—but it IS a thing!! It IS!! I DID NOT GROW UP THINKING OF EXERCISE UNCONNECTED TO WEIGHT LOSS, I just DIDN’T!!
Isn’t it insane how women have to spend this mental energy pointedly and persistently unfucking ourselves when it comes to our bodies, health, food, self-esteem, etc?
Like, it’s WORTH IT, but jesus.
Nice! I also think it’s important to push against the capitalism-dieting machine.
Agree. This has layers. I’m single. I feel like men are really behind on honoring body versus oh I look good on your arm in a bikini. I want to be happy wherever I am on the scale. Radical acceptance :)
Its a complicated web, eh? I helped my 12 year old daughter through an eating disorder this year and it all made me so mad – that a rotten piece of information wormed itself in her brain telling her to lose weight! She’s still growing! Things have gotten better for her, thank goodness. Kudos to you for working on it.
laser hair Removal
All & Sundry