JB’s parents have this story about going out to eat at a Sizzler when JB was little, maybe around Dylan’s age or so. Actually, it’s not so much a story, because they’ve never shared the details of what exactly happened during this outing, only that it was so traumatic they didn’t go back to that Sizzler for, like, twenty years.

We haven’t experienced anything quite so bad with either kid, but I have a very bad memory of taking Riley to a Blockbuster when he was in that mobile-yet-completely-unreasonable baby/toddler stage. He wanted to get down and walk and the instant his feet hit the ground I had to chase him all over the store, through the giant line of exasperated customers, and eventually behind the counter where the employees were. Figuring it would be better for us to wait in the car, I picked him up, only to have him do that boneless/backflopping thing while a horrible, eardrum-rupturing sound spiraled from his mouth. I remember with grim, vivid detail every moment of that humiliating march across the store to the door, as my child thrashed in my arms like a rabid badger and shrieked so loud every single person turned to stare.

JB and I were driving by this same Blockbuster a couple weeks ago and I started to suggest that we stop and pick up a new release, then I considered the logistics. Riley would be no problem, but Dylan . . . well, we didn’t have the stroller and Dylan would want to walk and he’d probably do the exact same thing Riley did a few years ago: run all over the store, tear DVD boxes off shelves, and attempt to root through the employee garbage. Then there would be the red-faced exit, ferrying a tantruming child back out the car, and JB would be left to his own devices with regards to movie-choosing and we’d end up watching some shit like Bangkok Dangerous.

The Blockbuster Thing is one of the reasons I feel so conflicted about Dylan: how at the very same time I am nearly crazed by how fast he’s growing and wish I could preserve his chubby no-knuckled baby hands and no-kneecapped baby legs in amber before they suddenly become filled with bones like some sort of big kid, I am also eager to move past this stage of Strong Will + Mobility – Ability to Reason = TODDLER DEATHSTAR.

To be clear, it’s not specifically about Blockbuster, but rather the Blockbuster-at-large. I mean, I’m looking forward to the day we plan a family vacation to Hawaii, which involves air travel, something I would only do now if you paid me eleventy jillion dollars AND promised a bevy of Thorazine darts would be available to me during the flight.

In the meantime, I’ll invest our tropical vacation money in Netflix and try and savor Dylan’s ridiculous Pillsbury legs, because like everything else, they won’t last forever.



Notify of
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
15 years ago

You need to copywrite that Deathstar comment! I may steal it and put it on a t-shirt. Hilarious!

Sarah @ BecomingSarah.com

Deathstar. Perfect analogy.

15 years ago

Read your post Sunday morning. Exactly two hours later, as I’m exiting Kroger with baby in baby carrier, backpack on, toddler in hand, and poor grocery bagger pushing the cart of my groceries out to my car, toddler decides she wants to be carried. I gently inform her that she can hold my hand like a big girl because mommy’s hands are full. At which point she shrieks, flops down right between the doors and the carts so that no one can come in or go out of the store, and proceeds to sob, “I want my daddy! I want my daddy!”


Oh, did I mention that the grocery bagger is a student of mine in my 3rd hour English class? So, of course, he myspaced the incident to everyone as soon as he got off work…


15 years ago

I do not believe that Sweet Innocent Redhaired Angel of Goodness has ever given you a moment’s trial.

(snort. I kill me. hahaha).

15 years ago

omg…want to raspberry his belly…

15 years ago

“Strong Will + Mobility – Ability to Reason = TODDLER DEATHSTAR”

O.M.G. too funny! I’m in the middle of the “Toddler Deathstar” stage myself. So far, we’re enjoying some peace by taking him in a jogging stroller into stores. BUT – gotta move constantly. The minute we stop – instant Toddler Meltdown.

9 years ago

When someone writes an piece of writing he/she keeps
the plan of a user in his/her mind that how a user can understand it.
So that’s why this article is great. Thanks!

repelente polvo
9 years ago

Every weekend i used to pay a visit this web site, because i wish for enjoyment, for the reason that this this web page conations
really good funny data too.


магазин виниловых пластинок http://blackrecords.com.ua

rapid muscle growth
9 years ago

Excellent post. Keep posting such kind of information on your site.
Im really impressed by it.
Hey there, You have performed a fantastic job.
I will certainly digg it and in my opinion recommend to
my friends. I’m confident they will be benefited from this site.

Here is my website: rapid muscle growth

Hill Climb Racing hack tool

Hi to every single one, it’s really a pleasant
for me to go to see this web page, it contains precious Information.

Besace Longchamp Pas Cher

Besace Longchamp Pas Cher Sacoche Longchamps iCoff Un arco non è male parole ricamate Ciao Kitty e Ciao Kitty viso.
Questa borsa è molto glamour, che avrebbe g reggiseno con qualcosa.

Longchamp Tour Eiffel Sac De Voyage Longchamp aXGAn Le condizioni
stradali um dio generalmente di sesso maschile di strade in aree remote
e li contrappone meglio mantenuti Hkan si è verificato. KJR attento tutto il tempo e tenere le luci limits.Traffic segmento velocità non funziona così spesso.
Prix Sac Pliage Longchamp Pochette Longchamps FmWpt L’uomo
scioccato e non può stare perché ha le gambe
di spaghetti, e finisce per vomitare himeself. Essi dovrebbero essere amici
laghi luminosi, invece di aspettare per 5 minuti un’ambulanza in ospedale
in un taxi e il conducente buttare.. Portefeuille Longchamp Homme Sac
Longchamp D Occasion pcbFr Modo Pagina, che è
molto dinamico, in evoluzione secondo il progresso del tempo.

Generazione di tutte le età sarà sicuramente cambiate e gusti di ogni generazione deve essere la differenza che non può essere bloccato in un punto..
sac longchamp pliage Noir Sac De Voyage Longchamp CShSx Per Ozturk,
era la ricompensa della salita meno di essere
i primi scalatori a completarlo, e più sulle esperienze
culturali e paesaggi mozzafiato lui e ai suoi compagni di squadra ricevuti per vivere insieme.
Arrampicare con tali amici in una delle parti più visivamente mozzafiato dell’Himalaya è il
tipo di avventura che alimenta la mia anima, ha detto..

Valise Longchamp Sacoche Longchamp Homme Pas Cher rnPuU Le auto ibride,
turbine eoliche e riciclaggio sta diventando una parte
della nostra vita. Bene, questo è letteralmente indossa scarpe
verdi, una guida per ridurre le emissioni di carbonio. Sac Longchamp Homme Pas Cher Longchamp Toile ngYxI Non si può costruire e crescere
senza le risorse necessarie. Anche in questo caso se hai mai
giocato un gioco RTS, si sa che alla fine di ogni partita, nella maggior parte dei
casi il totale delle risorse è cinque volte
più grande di quello che avete usato. Besace Longchamp Pliage Longchamp En Solde
DcLuq Raccolta Montrail Masochist Trail Montaa delle scarpe più popolari, scarpe da arrampicata
in grado di sopportare i rigori delle sfide che sono noti per la loro
eccellente qualità, lo stato degli uomini popolari sport Montrail Bedrock Plus.
GTX Montrail Sabino aspre montagne e terreno estremo e l’arrampicata, a dispetto di un occupato stile di vita e l’uso regolare, un paio di scarponi possono
richiedere anni TX..

Philippine Architect
9 years ago

Whats up very nice blog!! Man .. Excellent .. Amazing .. I
will bookmark your site and take the feeds also? I am glad to seek
out so many useful info here within the submit, we’d like develop extra strategies on this regard,
thanks for sharing. . . . . .

Take a look at my blog – Philippine Architect

9 years ago

If some one wants to be updated with hottest technologies afterward he must be pay a quick visit this website and be up to date all the


Asking questions are really good thing if you are not understanding
something entirely, except this paragraph offers
nice understanding even.

chapel hill taxi rdu
9 years ago

Here are some insightful quotes I like… Lemme know
if you like them:

“Imagination is more important than knowledge. For knowledge is limited, whereas imagination embraces the entire world, stimulating progress, giving birth to development.”

“I, at any rate, am convinced that He (God) does not throw dice.”

“The significant matter is not to stop questioning; curiosity has its own reason for existing.”

“Science without religion is lame, religion without science is blind.”

“Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I am not sure about the universe.”

“Falling in love isn’t at all the most dumb thing that people do — but gravitation cannot be held responsible for it.”

“The most beautiful experience we can have is the mysterious.

“Anyone who hasn’t made a mistake has never tried
anything new.”

“Strive not to become a man of success, but instead try to become a man of value”

Dean Graziosi scam
9 years ago

I’ve been browsing on-line greater than 3 hours lately, yet I by no means discovered any interesting article like yours. It¡¦s lovely worth enough for me. In my view, if all site owners and bloggers made good content material as you did, the net might be a lot more useful than ever before.

Accomplice phone sex
9 years ago

It’s not my first time to go to see this site, i am visiting this web page dailly and get
nice information from here all the time.

JIGARTHANDA 2014 Tamil Movie Full Movie Online Free

Hey I know this is off topic but I was wondering
if you knew of any widgets I could add to my blog
that automatically tweet my newest twitter updates.

I’ve been looking for a plug-in like this for quite some time and was hoping maybe
you would have some experience with something like this.
Please let me know if you run into anything. I truly enjoy reading your blog and I look forward to your
new updates.

9 years ago

I was very pleased to find this website.
I wanted to thank you for your time for this wonderful read!!
I definitely appreciated every bit of it and I have you book-marked
to look at new stuff in your website.


high school story cheats for ipod…

Dichotomy : All & Sundry…

download Quickbooks 2014

Good blog post. I certainly love this site.
Continue the good work!


At this moment I am going away to do my breakfast,
when having mү breakfast coming yet again to read fսrther news.

9 years ago

I don’t even understand how I ended up right here, but I thought this publish was great.
I do not recognize who you’re but certainly you’re going to a famous blogger if you aren’t already.


9 years ago

Wow that was unusual. I just wrote an incredibly long comment but afteer I clicked submit my comment didn’t show up.

Grrrr… well I’m not wriing all that over again. Regardless, just
wanted to say wonderful blog!

My homepage: orquesta gardel (Savannah)

Télécharger Des Films Gratuitement

Remarkable issues here. I am very satisfied to see your article.

Thanks a lot and I’m looking forward to contact you. Will
you kindly drop me a mail?

Feel free to visit my homepage; Télécharger Des Films Gratuitement

truck driver association

Good day very cool website!! Guy .. Beautiful .. Wonderful ..
I’ll bookmark your blog and take the feeds additionally?

I’m happy to search out numerous useful info here within the publish,
we’d like develop extra techniques in this regard,
thanks for sharing. . . . . .


Excellent beat ! I wish to apprentice at the same
time as you amend your website, how could i subscribe for a weblog web site?

The account aided me a applicable deal. I had been tiny bit acquainted of this your broadcast offered vivid
transparent concept

Here is my website Hungry Shark Evolution Hack

After Effects Particles Overlay

Admiring the hard work you put into your website and detailed
information you provide. It’s awesome to come across
a blog every once in a while that isn’t the same out of date rehashed material.
Great read! I’ve saved your site and I’m including your RSS feeds to my Google

my webpage – After Effects Particles Overlay


Ballet shoes from Adidas in 2002 when Madden was convvicted
of stock means that it’s very important as saving money on all types of
shoes still exists because it is google important.

9 years ago

Great blog you have got here.. It’s hard to
find excellent writing like yours these days. I seriously appreciate individuals
like you! Take care!!

my web-site; site (Laurene)

essay writing service
9 years ago

Hi there, all the time i used to check blog posts here early in the
dawn, for the reason that i love to learn more and more.

my web site :: essay writing service

9 years ago

Howdy! This is my first visit to your blog! We are a group of volunteers and starting a new initiative in a community in the same niche.
Your blog provided us valuable information to work on. You have done a extraordinary job!

penis increase surgery

An interesting discussion is worth comment.

I believe that you should write more on this topic, it may not be a taboo matter but usually folks don’t talk about these topics.
To the next! All the best!!

clash of clans gemmes gratuit

When I originally commented I appear to have clicked the -Notify me when new comments are added- checkbox and now whenever a comment is
added I get 4 emails with the same comment. Is there a way you can remove
me from that service? Kudos!

Enzyme Cleaner
9 years ago

Hi to every one, the contents existing at this web site are truly
amazing for people experience, well, keep up the nice work fellows.

private property impound software

They were more then happy to give me back my car without me
paying one cent for towing my car. Forde and Gaxiola
will be tried together in January of 2011, if all goes according to
Hoyle. SB1070 simply codifies federal law into state law and removes excuses and concerns about states inherent authority to enforce these laws and removes all illegal “sanctuary” policies.

Also visit my blog post private property impound software

promo sbobet
9 years ago

Pretty nice post. I just stumbled upon your weblog and wanted to say that
I have truly enjoyed browsing your blog posts.
After all I’ll be subscribing to your rss feed and I hope you write again soon!

צמיגים לרכב במבצע

I was recommended this blog through my cousin. I’m not certain whether
this post is written by means of him as no one else realize such
precise about my difficulty. You’re amazing! Thank you!

livarison gratuite amazon

I have read so many articles regarding the blogger lovers however this paragraph is really a
nice post, keep it up.

Montreal Escort
9 years ago

Great post. I was checking constantly this blog and I’m impressed!
Extremely useful info specifically the last part :) I care for such info a lot.
I was seeking this certain information for a very long time.
Thank you and good luck.


This is my first time pay a visit at here and i am actually happy
to read all at single place.

Backyard Innovator Review

To be fair, it was sweltering inside the venue; one can only imagine how hot the performers felt under the lights.
A well designed Mediterranean landscape conjures up the romantic vistas of Rome, Tuscany, the Greek islands,
or sunny Spain. Whenever coupled with the adjustable pace atmosphere handler or even gasoline heater, you’re going to get
efficiencies more than fourteen SEER, which could additional slow up the working price of
the air conditioner.

My page Backyard Innovator Review

North Face Denali Clearance

I do accept as true with all of the ideas you have introduced in your post.
They are really convincing and will definitely work.
Nonetheless, the posts are too quick for newbies.
Could you please extend them a little from
next time? Thanks for the post.

california san diego electricians

Contemporary outdoor electrician solutions lighting systems are a smart
investment. Many times the good ones will not electrician solutions be negatively affected.
School leavers could greatly benefit from a gentle push to
learn the skills that involved in commercial
maintenance and home repairs. For some, the negatives of
being an electrician. And electrician solutions because of that
reason, it is important to note that there are positives and negatives when choosing an electrician for
references from preceding clients and actually speak to
the references provided.

black mold
9 years ago

Constructing structures want assorted upkeep providers carried
out from time to time. Storms resembling hurricanes, typhoons, floods and high winds could
cause critical harm to building buildings. Sturdy winds can tear off roofs, harm partitions, blow out windows and cause bushes to
fall damaging structures below. Along with the ugly effects, mould is taken into
account a severe well being hazard.

hry herna zdarma hrajte

To bylo hlášeno Fox News a lze stále nalézt na jejich
webových stránkách

9 years ago

For most recent news you ave to go to see internet
and on thhe web I found this site as a finest web site for hottest updates.

Feel free to visit my web blog – club penguin membership
code generator (Booker)

surround sound speakers for tv

Simply desire to say your article is as surprising.
The clarity in your post is just spectacular and i can think you’re a professional on this subject.

Well together with your permission allow me to grasp your RSS feed to stay updated with drawing close post.
Thank you a million and please keep up the
rewarding work.

A webpage concerning modern technology: surround sound speakers for tv


Pretty! This has been a really wonderful article. Thanks for
supplying these details.

Also visit my weblog … how to get girls with stealth
attraction (http://www.offshoreservicedirectory.com)