A while ago my aunt asked me if I was planning to work on a book, now that I’m in this season of parenting/life and have more time on my hands. Oh gosh no, I said, laughing a little. I guess I just don’t feel called to that. I wish I did, really. I wish the words felt pent up, ready to pour from me. Or even that I would lower a bucket and at first it would just be a hollow rattling sound but eventually, arduously, it would fill. Writing feels like such a wetwork excavation, and I feel so dry.

People have often asked me when I plan to write a book. It’s meant as a compliment, I know. Writing a whole entire book and of course getting that book published is such an massive accomplishment and endorsement, I have so much admiration for that path. Maybe that’s still in my future, I don’t know. It’s always just felt too hard for me, really. I can’t imagine the discipline to spend that much time in the liminal space of writing, especially without constant feedback and encouragement along the way. I can’t imagine coming up with that much material, to be honest. I have often felt best suited to exactly this type of writing here on my little blog, relatively short and without much structure. When people say you should write a book! I have often thought, well but I like this. I’ve recently been watching TikTok videos from a girl who talks about true crime stories and her comments are full of people telling her to get a podcast, but she’s so right for the short-form video format.

It is true there is more of a potential for a larger audience with a book. I wonder if that would even be something I’d want, though. Larger audiences are scary. Whoever is still out there reading this blog, bless you, because it’s not like I make it easy. The little email notification thing is long broken, no one really uses RSS readers any more, and I don’t promote on social media. I feel like whatever’s happening here between me the writer and you the reader, it’s pretty intentional and personal at this point. You’re not just stumbling upon me. And even if you are, that’s kind of special just because of how unlikely it is. Here I am, writing letters in bottles and tossing them willy-nilly into the sea, and there you are on some distant beach. That’s pretty cool.

I miss how the Internet used to be, how we used to discover each other as writers. I miss reading bloggers on a regular basis and how that was so motivating for my own writing, and how I just don’t feel that way from monetized Substacks or viral social posts. But who cares — the world has moved on. Crabbing about that feels like when I drive by this sign near our town that says “I MISS THE AMERICA I GREW UP IN.” You probably miss blatant racism, I always think, grouchily, but maybe they mean something more wholesomely nostalgic. Maybe they miss when everyone watched the same TV shows or didn’t have phones to stare at or kids played outside until moms stood on porches and called them in or food wasn’t full of processed garbage or microplastics, but what does it matter? The sign is silly, because here we are, hurtling ever forward. We can’t be mired in what we miss because we’ll never get it back, not really. I’d write a book about it but I’ll never have the right words.

Comments

Subscribe
Notify of
guest

30 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Lee
Lee
26 days ago

Bravo! Perfection.
Keep sharing right here, just like this. And thank you!

nic
nic
26 days ago

And this is exactly why I keep coming back here, where every once in a while I find a new post and when I’m even luckier it’s one like this that expresses my thoughts and feelings about a topic so well <3

Kristina
Kristina
26 days ago

Just a note to say I’m here reading. I’m always so happy to see a new post from you. I still use Feedly and there are two bloggers that I follow who still post. I also follow the Onion so it’s not too sad and empty.

Thank you for your writing.

Lisa
Lisa
21 days ago
Reply to  Kristina

I use Feedly too. I read a few fashion blogs that post almost daily still. Most of the mom bloggers rarely post, but I’m always delighted to see you all pop up!

Emma
Emma
25 days ago

I still use Inoreader and I’m so happy to see your name pop up every now and then. I selfishly hope you’ll never write the book that will get you the fame you clearly deserve, because it would mean you’d take this blog down and the last link I have to those precious 2000’s will be gone for good.

Shes
Shes
25 days ago

‘I feel like whatever’s happening here between me the writer and you the reader, it’s pretty intentional and personal at this point.’
Love this!! Yes, I miss the days of so many new blogger posts that I couldn’t keep up with them all. But I love hearing from those that stayed – you being one of the very few. Intentional, to be sure!

Kate
Kate
25 days ago

Very intentional! You and a handful of others are on my permanent bookmark list, and I check in now and then. Like Nic said, even better than a new post in general is one that resonates so strongly with how I feel as well.

Annie
Annie
25 days ago

Message in a bottle is exactly what it feels like. I’m glad you’re still throwing them in now and again!

Roberta
25 days ago

I’m glad you show up periodically in my RSS feed! I miss blogs too, and I only wrote in one briefly, when my oldest was born.

Rachel
Rachel
25 days ago

Been reading for probably more than 15 years! Feedly alerts me. I love reading anything you post :)

KeraLinnea
KeraLinnea
25 days ago

I started reading you just before you got pregnant with Riley, which just seems crazy. I love your writing, and as long as you keep posting now and then, I’ll keep checking every week or so to see if there’s something new!
I totally get missing the old internet. I used to have a list of bloggers I would check daily, and it was long enough that it usually took over an hour to check everyone’ blog and read whatever was posted, but nowadays, it’s just you, Swistle, and Mimismartypants. Everyone else has moved on. I can’t complain, though…I tried keeping a blog, and I think I made it about a year, with very infrequent postings, and it’s been lying fallow since about 2016.
Now that I think about it, you, Swistle and Mimi were the first blogs I started really following, so it’s kind of nice that you’re the three still going!
Anyway, I’m starting to ramble. Thanks for sharing your writing with us!

Julie
Julie
3 days ago
Reply to  KeraLinnea

I started reading around that time, too! Hard to believe he’s an adult!

Rachel T
Rachel T
25 days ago

I’m also still here, always pleased to find another one of your letters in a bottle on the beach.

Kat
Kat
25 days ago

Still reading after all these years, because every now and again I think “I wonder what Sundry(Linda)’s up to”. I never used RSS feeds with any regularity, and I haven’t had any social media accounts since before the end of The Before Times, so I’m here because your writing is memorable. Thank you.

Misha
Misha
25 days ago

I’ve been reading since Riley was little, too, & besides your immaculate skills with humor & words that I love reading, it also kind of feels like we used to live in the same neighborhood, you know? I don’t mean literally (although I did live in Bellingham when you were in Seattle, & now I live near Lincoln city, strangely enough) but I more mean: I think you’d remember Joy Unexpected, or Eden Kennedy, or Finslippy, etc etc & it feels like we were all kind of in the trenches with babies in our online neighborhood. You’ve always had such a way of making us all feel less alone in those trenches. I’m grateful you keep writing & doing it your way.

sara
sara
24 days ago

I’d like to voice my appreciation that you do still continue to post here!! I’ve been following along for- fricking- ever and it always brightens my day when I check in and find a new post (even if said post makes me cry lol).

Cari
24 days ago

I will forever keep Feedly (or something similar) for the days your writing shows up there. I’ve been reading since Riley was a baby, and feel the sort of kinship others have described.

Nicole
Nicole
24 days ago

Yet another reader that has been following your blog since Riley’s birth. I haven’t missed a single post in these 18 years, though I rarely comment. Your beautiful writing has helped so many of us feel less alone through the challenges of parenthood, marriage, and life itself. Thank you for every bit of it.

Sarah
Sarah
23 days ago

So glad I keep finding your bottles of writing (since Riley was a baby)! They are perfection.

Alex
Alex
23 days ago

I love reading your words, whatever the format. And I commiserate about the “old days” of blogging. xo

KImberley
KImberley
23 days ago

Still here and still loving your writing. Thank you for continuing send these messages in a bottle. Those last two sentences – gah! So wise and so true. Appreciate you, please never stop telling your stories.

gwen
gwen
22 days ago

I wonder if “when will you write a book” is an attempt to find another way to say “I love your writing and I will read anything you put out into the world, whenever and however you choose to do it.” Because that’s what it would mean from me — but I also hope you stay right here in this space too, and/or write literally whatever and wherever you want, because I still really appreciate hearing your thoughts after all these eyars. You and mimismartypants and Swistle are the reason I still use feedly, and I get a sweet little dopamine hit every time I see you’ve updated, so thank you for that.

Holly
Holly
21 days ago

I’ve been reading you since the Diaryland days! I remember clicking on a banner ad that led me to your page. That was what, 23-24 years ago? I was in high school at the time and I thought your life was so glamorous!

Kelley O
Kelley O
20 days ago

I read you via the Feedly RSS feed, but I’ve been reading your posts wherever they show up since Diaryland days, before the boys were born. Yeah, that long ago. Keep doing what you’re doing and I’ll keep reading it. :)

mcw
mcw
18 days ago

This is a cozy corner of the internet. Just perfect for sharing your stories and insights.

Frema (Bree)
Frema (Bree)
17 days ago

It’s been a while, but I am always so happy to come here and find a post from you!
I miss the old blogging days, too, and one of my goals is to get back into it in 2025, after a tumultuous few years, on a new site I created last year. I follow many Substacks and writers on other platforms, but when it comes to writing for myself, blogs hold a special place in my heart.
I laughed to myself when you mentioned the email notification function being broken. When I saw your post tonight, I first thought to myself, “Didn’t I used to get these in my email? I better resubscribe!”
Wishing you the best and can’t wait to catch up on the posts I’ve missed these last several months!

Last edited 17 days ago by Frema (Bree)
sooboo
sooboo
16 days ago

You just come into my mind randomly, and I’ll Google your blog to see what’s up—that’s how old-fashioned I still am. There is this idea that we should all be striving for a big break or fame or greatness, but when that’s all anyone is trying for, it just seems really not that great. I’m glad you’re keeping it old school, and I’ll keep reading as long as you are writing.

Laura
Laura
12 days ago

Thank you for taking the time to come back to all of us. You have a true gift with words and I always look forward to reading what’s going on in your head. It makes me feel less alone!

Dawn
Dawn
9 days ago

I miss blogs and free formats, as well. You are my favorite and thank you for the perspective, as I too have asked for a book. I love your style, is all. Thank you for sharing a post.

LizP
LizP
4 days ago

Feedly as an RSS feed still works and when I remember there are blogs out there I read this and others :-)