December 14, 2006

Ooh, thank you so much for your suggestions! What would I do without you guys? Wander the earth, alone and ill-read, sporting unattractive raccoon eyes, that’s what.

I particularly enjoyed all your book recommendations, and I’d love to see some kind of conceptual data model (the kind with overlapping circles, what are they called…Venn diagrams?) of the various book titles so we could see all the common themes. It’s oddly fascinating to know so many of you have read Seabiscuit, Time Traveler’s Wife, and Lamb: The Gospel.

I’m going to (nerdily) collate your recommendations together and next time I’m at the bookstore or library I will be PREPARED. And I can kick the copy of “The Emotional Life of the Toddler” off my nightstand because seriously, it’s great and all to understand my child might be internally conflicted with feelings of attachment and independence, and that’s why he’s eating a rock, but I can only take so much toddler navel-gazing. Unless of course we’re talking about his actual navel, which I could happily stare at all day long.

(It’s a combo outie/innie! And it demands a blowfart at least once per day.)

Seattle is supposed to get some kind of massive windstorm this evening, which I’m not looking forward to because we had some high winds yesterday that dropped all kinds of tree detritus on the roof, scared Dog, and resulted in an hours-long interruption of cable service, which wiped out our internet connection, phone, and TV in one fell swoop (hilariously, we received a flyer in yesterday’s mail reminding us “THAT’S COMCASTIC!” Bite my dong, Comcast). It was like living in the DARK AGES, OMG. I’m kidding, but it was surprisingly annoying to have the internet down – it’s a little freaky how much I rely on it for everything from movie reviews (IMDB could have possibly saved us from World Trade Center, which in my opinion was schmaltzy, formulaic, and entirely unemotional despite all the heavy-handed sentimentality. Also, Nicolas Cage in a semi-porny mustache = disturbing) to recipes to fact-checking to good old fashioned websurfing (IE, the list of worst toys ever made).

High winds are always bad after a shitload of rain, so I hope this storm passes with relatively little damage. Also, I hope the local news refrains from calling it WINDSTORMWATCH 2006, but I won’t hold my breath. Those of you who live in the area, what do you want to bet some poor fucker is hunched over a copy of Photoshop right now, furiously working on a properly dire image to accompany the weather updates tonight?

Windy.jpg

In other news, the boy had a checkup yesterday and he’s at the 50th percentile for weight, 75th for height, and 90th (again) for head size. I fear he will have to wear custom-made hats someday.

His doctor ran through a list of various developmental questions – is he talking a little, is he walking, blah blah, and then she asked if he was stacking things. I lied and said yes, because I felt that although I haven’t witnessed him stacking his toys, exactly (he likes to throw his stacking rings under the couch), if he’s able to take a phone over to JB when I say, “Brrr-ing! Hello? Oh, it’s for Daddy. Can you take the phone to Daddy?” and wait with panting openmouthed excitement for the moment when JB says “Hello? Oh! Well, I think you’re going to have to talk to my SON about this,” and hands the phone back to him, so he can hold it somewhat near his head while jabbering intently in Toddler-ese…well, fuck it, he’s not getting a black mark for “Doesn’t Stack; Is Dumb” or whatever. Take that, Milestone Police!

This doctor also called him “Zachary” on at least five occasions during the visit, so frankly I don’t think she’s meeting her own milestones. “Repeatedly Refers to Patient By Wrong Name; Is Dumb”, that’s what I’m marking on her sheet.

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Jennifer
Jennifer
17 years ago

Here’s some photos of storm damage around the I-5 corridor – from the far north down into Oregon, but with major damage in Seattle area. I was just in Seattle today and while the downtown has power, all the surrounding areas including Bellevue (Sundry’s area) are still without power and may be that way until Monday night at least.

If you flip through some of these photos you can see plenty of huge trees completely uprooted, with the tree either taking out a power line or a house (or both).

http://www.king5.com/perl/common/slideshow/sspop.pl?recid=2353&nextimage=0

I’m now back in Bellingham where we didn’t get hit as badly. Seattle is a disaster area though. There will be thousands still without power for much of this week.

Sonia
Sonia
17 years ago

Jim Foreman! My husband and I call him ‘Dangerboy’. If ever there’s an event that requires a reporter to be in a rain slicker, dripping wet anyway and being beaten by heavy winds and oh, say, a crumbling bridge or something, it’s HIM covering it. Unfortunately, because of aforementioned wind storm, we had no power to watch him in all of his weather beaten glory. And…my husband works for Comcast….*running*.

Kat
Kat
17 years ago

I just started reading your stuff, and am really happy to have found a reliable place to laugh at the kind of stuff I relate to best. Anyway…
My friend took her daughter “M” in for the 6 year check-up. The pediatrician gave M a pencil and asked her to draw a person on the paper covering the exam table. M looked totally lost and couldn’t even begin. My friend just about died as the doctor started to make those doctor-clicky sounds. Any 6 year old should be able to draw a body, head, and a few appendages–better if they add a few facial features as well. As this was very patiently being explained to my friend (slowly, ’cause how bright can this mom be, if her kid can’t draw a person), and the doctor started to explain all the ramifications this terrible delay might be indicative of, M drew a chicken. Not just any chicken, but a chicken with wings, toes, eyes, beak, nostrils, the hangy-down part under the chin, and the whole nine yards. Then she copied the doctor’s name off her name tag and named the chicken accordingly. Oh yeah, and she added the date.
The doctor at least had the good sense to laugh, apologize, and say she couldn’t wait to see M in another year!
Ok, so you can tell we live on the east side of the state. But still, a doctor is a doctor no matter where you are, and will never be the mother of your child. So Riley doesn’t stack, maybe because he’s holding out for the legos and lincoln logs!

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