Jan
13
January 13, 2007
Well, I’m glad to be back home and settled in our little plague-ridden house — we all have juicy, repulsive coughs and the Kleenex is disappearing at a frightening rate, but still: home is where the mucus heart is.
Thanks for indulging my frequent yet boring updates from the road last week, and here are some of the last of the photos I took in San Francisco:
Freaky statue in Yerba Buena Gardens.
Street in front of my hotel.
Moscone Center.
More buildings I can’t identify.
And here’s what happened to the front pocket of my suitcase during the flight home:
JB says I must have left the cap off but even though I admit I am sort of a cap leaver-offer at home I doubt I did so before packing the suitcase. I think it EXPLODED mid-flight, and I for one would like to know why an armed air marshall did not take immediate action to save us all from deadly paste shrapnel.
Also, I guess I need to replace that library book.
Lastly, here’s what I came home to:
My family, Dog, a beautiful blanket of snow and no need to drive anywhere. Life is good.
I USE that toothpaste. And the cap? It has never gone back on correctly after the first time we opened it. It doesn’t…twist on tightly. At all. You are totally not at fault, because it is a classic case of Shitty Package Design. (But that toothpaste is good, I think.)
Oh! And I just showed my fiance that photo, and he yelled, “THAT TOOTHPASTE! YOU CAN’T CLOSE IT. THAT CAP DOESN’T WORK.”
At your urging via Sundry Buzz, I decided to try out that toothpaste. It’s pretty good, but the cap tried to kill me. We are frequent cap-replacing-delinquents and since it was just sitting on the counter, the cats decided it would be a good “play thing” so of course when I stepped out of the shower, what did my foot meet with a sharp, piercing pain? I kid you not, that god damned cap broke through my tender foot flesh and I had a ring of blood rising up from the wound. My massage therapist (ooooh yes, prenatal massage is divine) was working on my foot and she was like “what the hell is this??” It was pretty funny. It took two weeks to heal proper! A toothpaste cap!
Anyhow, that’s my story.
Glad you are home safe and sound. Yeah, snow. Don’t mind me for not getting excited about it. It’s nearly up to our windows here! Even the damn moose can hide out in the snow mounds!
The kleenex went like mad in our house too. We’re all three on Zpacs and feel soooo much better!
Don’t let it go too long before you go to the DR.
You must be so, so happy to be home. I hope that Riley is barking less, he looks good anyway!
Life *IS* good.
Also, I put all potential-exploding toiletries in Ziploc bags when I travel. Living in Colorado, where I would travel between sea level and altitude, taught me that. I have experienced more than one shampoo/body lotion/toothpaste explosions myself.
Glad your home in one piece, sorry you are under the weather.
First, Welcome Home! Your family and pets are just all too damned good looking. Ridiculously good looking, if you will.
And also and of utmost importance, is it just me, or is that first photo of a freakish representation of George Dubwa (in all his chimpanzee-esque glory) in statue form? Because I saw it and thought, “Huh. Now that is surprising that you would be able to find a GWB statue in San Francisco.”
But maybe it’s just me.
I always love the toddlerlicious Boy but I was happy to see a picture of Dog. Sorry you guys feel like crap.
Maybe you should start a class action suit about that toothpaste.
Ditto on the Ziploc- I’m obsessive about packing & storing things with those bags (which sucks because I cannot find them in the UK and have to insanely waste valuable suitcase space importing plastic bags from the US).
And ditto on the Dog shot- I laughed out loud with that one. Dogs are just so totally awesome.
YAY you’re home. Sorry it’s not under less messy & less mucusy conditions.
That statue in SF? That’s the thing nightmares are made of.
Snow!!! I am so jelious! My kids have yet to ever really see snow. It looks like so much fun.
As for the paste. I think everytime we fly something busts. Now we put everything in a ziploc or put tape around it. Solved that.
Welcome home! Yeah, those toothpaste caps are more of a suggestion than actually ya know, FUNCTIONAL.
Love the pics, so so so jealous of the snow! I just moved to Georgia after a lifetime on the NE coast, and I miss the cold and snow so much. Never thought I’d say THAT.
Glad you’re home safely and even if home IS plague-ridden, at least you’ve got the Boy and the Dog and the JB for company :)
That’s a beautiful picture of JB and Riley!! :)
It is totally the toothpaste tube’s fault, not yours, and I am willing to testify to that in court.
I am yet another commenter who packs everything in Ziplocs when I travel. I started doing it after a bottle of shampoo blew up in my suitcase. It was not as bad as the time I thought I could transport a 6-pack of bottled beer for my dad and 4 of the bottles broke all over my clothes and suitcase (did I smell like a dumpster, even after everything went through the wash? why yes I did! and could the suitcase be saved? no it could not!), but it was bad. Ziplocs, man. A traveler’s best friend.
Actually, I think fate was just giving you what you deserved for owning toothpaste that has the flavor ORANGE in it. How in the world can your mouth feel freshed by that. Karma. Fate. Call it what you will. I call it get some peppermint goodness and return to the world of proper dental care.
Glad you’re back and happy! Is that your house or the house across the street? I love R’s little jacket… we have the same one. It amuses me to no end! Also, that toothpaste was nasty… but I’d return the book all minty fresh before I replaced it. Oh well hope you are all feeling top notch soon.
We walked by that statue in Yerba Buena a couple weekends ago and it was surrounded by tourists just standing there, at a distance, staring, trying to figure out wtf.
At least your luggage is now minty-fresh.
Yes, more Dog pics please! I miss Dog.
Well, maybe the library will appreciate the new minty freshness of their book?
jen — that’s a neighboring house, ours is much smaller and has more dog poop in the yard.
You know, I use a Ziploc for all my shampoo/moisturizer/face soap, after an Unfortunate Incident involving a bottle of Lush, but I figured toothpaste was more securely packaged, or something. But I was OH SO WRONG.
PS. Does anyone have any idea how I can *clean* the suitcase? I thought about letting Dog just lick at it for a while, but maybe that would give her some kind of Extreme Clean overdose.
I am no Heloise but I’ve had success with freezing various yucky things and then scraping it off. Clean the remaining stuff off with a spot cleaner.
I wouldn’t let Dog or the Boy at it….high doses of fluoride and whatever else is in that tangerine mess probably isn’t a good idea. I also know some people would tell you to use one of those magic eraser things but I don’t know how well that would work on a suitcase. Good luck, feel better.
I’m so jealous – that snow looks gorgeous! Glad you’re home and hopefully you all feel better soon.
I can only imagine that time spent with the applephile nutsacks was worth it if only to return to the face of one storing some nuts of his own in those presh li’l cheeks.
I’ve just been assigned my first professional travel since my baby was born 2+ years ago. I don’t wanna. :(
Glad you are home with your boys. Feel better.
That statue looks a bit like Ronald Reagan…
On our way back from Minnesota last Christmas, the flight attendant gave us two of those cups of apple juice with the foil lid sealed air tightly around the cup. Ian drank one and his daddy put the other in his carry-on luggage. By the time we landed and Kevin looked inside his bag, he discovered the apple juice had gotten out of the cup, but the foil was still sealed tightly around it. Funnything, pressurized cabins and all.
I. want. dog.
Ack, what a mess! I used a different flavor of that brand at my sister’s house and swore that was the next tube of toothpaste I was going to buy. Next time put stuff like that in a ziploc baggy, that way you won’t have Mt. Vesuvius of Arctic Coolness spooging all over your stuff. Welcome home!
Dog could not possibly be any cuter and/or sadder-looking
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