What’s the first rule of Baby Fight Club?

“he often squirms around to tuck his arms underneath his chest while lying flat with his little chin resting on one of our shoulders.”
My son does this EXACT same thing. I LOVE it. It can’t get enough of the snuggles, because the busier he gets, the less I get. I also get open-mouth kisses. A litte “soap opera” for my taste, but welcome none the less.

Oh holy shit what a goose-egg! LOVE the shirt, so appropriate.

frillionth.
love it.

I spent a good portion of my weekend carrying around my cousin B’s little lovebug, as I couldn’t resist her little requests of “uhp-phease?”, and her parents were Far Too Happy to have someone else listen to that never-ending request for a weekend. It was the best weekend I’ve had in a long time.

My 1-yo has a matching bruise on her forehead. I also get slobbery raspberries on my limbs from her. That tickles!

Bruiser baby! I love the fierce expression on his face. Work it! Work it!

My goodness, what a bruise. What an adorable, tough little guy.

Snuggly babies are the best, aren’t they? My daughter is just a few months older than Dylan and she can be quite the snuggler. When it suits her, of course, as generally she has far better things to do.

His t-shirt is very fitting for this post!

Is it very wrong that I burst out laughing at Dylan’s picture? But I did add a heartfelt “Awwwwww. . . . “

Damn….now that’s a badge of honor! Poor bubby! Both my boys are snuggle bugs, even at 4 and 7. Best feeling ever!!!!

I swear you’re talking about my kids. My first was a Daddy-preferring, non-cuddling boy. My second is a “will cuddle with whoever is willing” boy. Yeah, the rejection from your own child is horrid. I mean, I did the carrying for nine months, now just love me, damn it.

My year-old boy has some horrible-looking bruise every week, and the woman at his daycare give me so much shit for it. It’s all very jovial, but I feel ridiculously guilty every time I hand him over with a fresh mark. Isn’t it impossible not to take these injuries personally?

I’m not sure I’d have the emotional fortitude to deal with the number of injuries Dylan inflicts on himself. I feel like a total pansy. When my son scrapes his knee I’m like OH MAH GAWD!!! -_-

My son starting rejecting me around 18 months and I was a little relieved because that’s when he finally weaned too. I was ready for Daddy to take over bed time.

Oooh – I love that little arms-tucked-in snuggle.

I know how it is to be rejected by your own kid. It sucked.

My older son has always preferred my husband to me. It was especially hard when he was an infant, because I would often be alone with him at night and on the weekend due to the odd shifts my husband worked. I would have this screaming child that wouldn’t calm down and didn’t want anything to do with me and there was nothing I could do about it, except try my best to comfort him. It was so hard and hurtful. It wasn’t what I expected at all, and yes, I was very jealous.

My baby however prefers me. It is me and only me he wants at night. And usually me he wants most other times. And I’ll admit that I definitely prefer being wanted over rejected. Even if some times I wish daddy was an acceptable substitute at night, so I could get some sleep.

I will say, as the person whose child prefers me, for now, that my heartache is NOT for myself — hell, if she’s Velcroed to me, she’s Velcroed to me, and yes, I would much rather be on this side of things — but for my husband. I feel AWFUL for him, and what happens is that I end up feeling really shitty myself, like I somehow ENGINEERED it to be this way (I assure you, I did not). And then I feel worse and worse every time she only wants me, and truthfully, I can’t even enjoy it. I just feel GUILTY. She doesn’t even SMILE for him. It’s like a BARRY MANILOW SONG.

I know it’s not the same and it’s SO MUCH WORSE for the rejected parent. I do. Father’s Day was awesome around here, when every time he so much as glanced in her direction, she buried her face in my neck. Happy Father’s Day, new dad! Now let your child commence rejecting you, over and over again and stab you in the heart repeatedly. Awesome.

I guess what I’m saying is, it really sucks for both parties, assuming the preferred party has a heart. I mean, it does not nearly suck as bad for the preferred party, you are *so* right, but man, my heart breaks for him. In a weird way, I hope the tables are turned someday soon, because he really, really deserves it. He’s a great dad, and doesn’t deserve a kid who just yells at him, then runs away.

I have one of those suction-cup kids. She’s almost 4 and I have to say, while I do enjoy being the preferred parent 95% of the time, it’d be nice if she’d allow Daddy to get her damn milk once in awhile.

aww poor Dylan, my 2nd *also my 2nd boy* was our little bruiser. He had a bigger head than his brother, but not by that much… it’s constantly bruised or healing from scratches, etc. He’ll be 3 in September. He is also my cuddlebug. I am his favorite person, and I am AOK with that ;)

Ps. What’s up w/ your site? The way it shows up in my google reader now, I can’t read your entry there. Is there some way I can fix that?

That sure is one big shiner on his head! Hope he feels okay!

I have a dainty little girl who likes to sport those goose-eggs and shiners but she never has to fight to get those wounds, her big head pulls her over.

I suck but I love being favorite parent, except when they are sick or tired or etc. etc. The extra cuddles – all so worth it.

Love you Linda. I’m feeling a version of your joy and pain with my own almost 2 and 4 year old boys. I can’t tell you how much your version tickles me to death and how it really puts into words what I’m thinking (but so much better because you actually know how to write). Love you again.

D looks like a teeny surly Marlon Brando in On the Waterfront.

PS. You have my sympathies re the hurt feelings. As much as we can rationalize and understand intellectually that these are phases, that kids lack the capabilities of adults, that young children – and even teenagers – are social simpletons finding their way, and that it’s not personal, their blunt rejections and unkind words HURT and feel personal. Thank God we are able to be objective because that’s what helps get us through this stuff.

I can completely relate! Our first baby, a girl HATED me. I am so certain of this that no one will ever convince me otherwise. I would cry all the time because if I even looked at her, she would scream her head off. Anyone else including strangers could hold her and she would smile, coo, be adoring, etc. I would pick her up and she would shriek like some wounded sick cow in heat. Fast forward to the next baby…yeah that wasn’t my idea trust me. Far as I was concerned the first demon spawning was more then I could take emotionally but suprise another one came along. The second one made up for the first in spades. She wouldn’t let anyone but me hold her and she was a cuddler.
The first one now sees the beauty in sucking up to mom when she wants something otherwise not much has changed.

My oldest wasn’t a snuggler as a baby but now he’s a love bug. He’s eight and still comes in for a snuggle and loves hugs from his Mom. He’s always favored me, but he’s really affectionate and close with Dad now too. He was a suction cup when he was a baby/toddler.

My youngest, loves anyone, except when she’s exhausted then it’s Mom. She’ll snuggle, but it’s not that deep soul-connecting snuggle that the oldest goes for.

Aren’t kids fascinating?

Dylan might be more snuggly than Riley, but he still looks pretty damn suspicious, in an adorable way, in that picture.

Carter could so be part of baby fight club. It seems like every other day either the sitter or I are handing him off to the other with a sheepish glance and a mumbled story of running into the coffee table or trying to climb onto a ball. I mean the kid just does not stop trying to hurt himself.

I am vastly the preferred parent right now, although I feel the pendulum is swinging. Carter used to never ask him to pick him up and nine times out of ten, if he was holding him and I walked into the general vicinity, Carter would swan dive toward me. I am still the only one he wants if he is hurt but the preference it is not quite as noticeable. Except that he says mama a lot. I cannot even imagine how it would feel to be the rejected. I asked my husband if it bothered him and he just shrugged his shoulders and said nah, not really. I still feel horrible about it.

OUCH!!! That looks like it must have hurt!

My kids have always tended to go to my husband for fun and me for comfort. Sometimes I think I must be boring!

I KNOW THE PAIN.

Except my kid acted as though I beat the sit out of him as soon as we left papaw’s house every single time I picked him up from a visit. And still DAYS later would go on and on about papaw. Also at 2 to 2.5 years old. I thought for sure I’d die! My poor broken heart. Also I might have once said “FOR GODS SAKES DYLAN IF YOU KEEP THIS UP YOU CAN”T GO STAY WITH PAPAW AGAIN!”

He still loves his papaw. He just loves me now too. It’s nice! lol.

I think we’re on the downside of a fierce daddy preference over here. Every once in a while he’ll deign to allow me to get him from a nap or buckle him into the car seat. But, if both of us are gone for more than five minutes, he pushes me out of the way to get to daddy. Way to kick mommy in the balls, kid.

Aww. My baby is not much of a snuggler. Unless he has a fever, and then he’s VERY content to snuggle all day long. We actually enjoy when the baby gets sick because we all spend the day just trading the baby back and forth for snuggles. “You’ve had him for almost an hour – it’s my turn!”

Thank Gawd the little badgers heal quickly! Mine took a splat on the cement paving stones outside the other week and had a bruiser like that for about 2 days. I can still remember the fleshy thump.
Mine is also Mama-velcro. I feel really bad about that sometimes, but I’m also 99% sure the next one will be all Daddy’s or at least more so, and I know that a day will come when boy #1 will decide he wants his Dah-DAHH! more (sometimes). Heck, he already SAYS Dadda, but only once in a blue moon says Mamma. Will say Dadda right to my face, but not Mom, Mommy or Mamma. But, I figure that is only fair all things considered!

Oh, and the snuggling! How could i forget that? the. best. after a really shitty day, too. My fave is when he hikes his butt up in the air and tucks his hands and legs under himself when he sleeps sometimes.

I have a sympathy headache looking at Dylan’s boo boo!

Man, those goose eggs pop up on baby-heads in SECONDS, just like in the cartoons. My kid is the same way.

LOVE how he’s sucking on the consolation bottle like a big ol’ stogie.

Thanks so much for these last couple posts (I love all your posts actually but the last couple have been right in sinc with my week). It’s SO SO nice to know I’m not alone trying to be a good parent to these loving/sucking toddlers/creatures-from-the-screamy-kicky-hell.

Everyone I know seems to be in the “oh yah, that was a tough age – heh” or “I’d never allow my baby to be anything but the perfect angel” camps. I love how you describe perfectly the hair pulling agony alongside the wonderfulness that is these little people.

My 3-yr-old has a matching lump (right down to size, color, AND location) he gave himself on the slide yesterday. He also seems to exactly match Dylan’s temperament, and given that he’s twice D’s age, one can conclude either A) Dylan is extremely advanced or B) my son is…uh… oh nevermind.

That t-shirt is so cute (and fitting!).

I just right…

When I initially…

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