Doctors, too. Doctors that are younger than me just…just…no. I’m pretty sure the OB on call when my 2nd was born was 12.

Nothing made me feel more like an impostor at the whole grown-up thing than sending my kid to school. I still feel like I’m faking it, but I don’t admit it to anyone, because they all look at me funny. Apparently most people do not feel this way. I’m even PTL treasurer now, but I’m still 8 years old.

Can I just say… I have never had THAT experience as part of a pap smear two-for-one deal. I can’t help but think of the episode of Friends where Chandler goes to Joey’s tailor and then informs Joey that most tailors don’t make THOSE kinds of adjustments. Or maybe my doctor just isn’t as thorough as yours. In any case, I got past my horror on your behalf, and moved on to nodding my head in agreement. Teachers, cops, and gynos? Should all be older than me.

One day, you’re sitting in study hall. The next, your son’s teacher has her metaphorical hand up your ass. It’s all very surreal. Except for recess. I don’t know about you, but recess still sounds like a damn fun time.

TOTALLY going through the exact same thing here.

Yep, same here. My son started kindergarten on Tuesday, and I so don’t feel qualified to be the mom of a student. Oh, and how dare you be two years younger than I am?!

This post describes how I’ve been feeling lately. I like to assume that everyone’s older than me and it trips me out when more and more, I’m the old one. 39. Which isnt old I know but, still…

Still trying to wrap around the fact that I’m a mother to a son who has to shave. At 14 the poor kid has to shave.

Whoa! So, I’ve spent the last few years either carrying and/or birthing children and therefore have allowed myself to take a few years off from having my insides further poked and prodded but when did a finger in the pooper become standard practice for a pap smear?

I used to work with a woman who told me that she told her gynecologist (every single time she saw him) that she had pantyhose older than he was. (I know…pantyhose!) That made me laugh at the time, and now that I’m nearing 50, I can relate to how she felt!

Never had that either! What are they looking for?

Yep- I call them by their first names and ask them to call me by my first name. It feels better. (Well, make *me* feel better – more adult somehow).

Sidenote: kiss up to the office staff! Bring them chickfila or donuts or whatever. Give them a reason to remember you.
I have a big giant basket and I gather cute, neat (target 1$, goodwill finds etc) stuff all year. I take it in at xmas and teacher appreciation week and let them pick whatever they want. They sure shooting remember me and it comes in super handy!

Oh my goodness, “although this certainly doesn’t bother me (as long as they don’t suddenly lunge at my anus with some sort of probe)”.

You just made me laugh so hard that I spat out my muesli.

I too am intrigued about what they may be looking for!

When I was in grad school, I knew someone with a child in the late teens, so that made him… in his mid 50s? I’m guessing? But he said once that he didn’t feel like such an “old guy” on the inside. He said (and I note that he was really musing sincerely, it only sounds creepy in retrospect) he liked to check out the undergraduate women every fall, in his head not thinking it was any different from when *he* was in his 20s, but then he realizes that he’s older and has a daughter almost that age, and now it’s unacceptable to really look at them that way and that somehow was unfair. I guess it’s the same kind of juxtaposition.

The guy who delivered my twins was a resident who looked like he was in his mid or perhaps late 20s. I wondered if he’d ever seen an attempted twin VBAC before. Lucky for me, the attending dr was right there next to him, advising him on how exactly to wrench a footling breech out of my body without killing any of us, so all was well.

Yes. I think that everyone is older than me. I read blogs of women who have 3 or 4 children and when I find out they are my age or gasp…younger…I can’t believe it. I have two kids now and could have many more since my husband and I waited 5 years to get pregnant and three years between the two but I still think I must be younger than all of these people with so many kids.

I had EXACTLY the same response when my son started school this year. I felt i should be doing his homework, eating his playlunch and negotiating my way out of his detention (yes, he’s had detention of sorts in kindergarten, let’s not go there). I honestly feel like I’m still in high school most days and I’m 34. Is this a gen x thing?

Don’t I know that feeling! My oldest is in 6th grade this year. I’m dreading the teen years for a number of reason, not the least of which is, AREN’T I STILL A TEENAGER???

Apparently, a 36-year-old girl is not considered a teen. (I can still call myself a girl, right?)

Did you see “Hook” with Robin Williams? Remember the little Lost Boy, saying, “Peter Pan’s got KIDS?” That’s how I feel most of the time. In fact, my sister says it to me on the phone quite regularly.

Pilots need to be older as well. You want a hint of gray, a calm, confident air and a steely “I’ve seen it all” glint in his/her eyes.

apparently the a-hole thing is a ‘newer’ thing, i remember thinking in horror when my girlfriend asked me if it was normal, to being horrified when it happened to me. *sigh*

I guess I am lucky my kiddo’s teachers have always been a bit older than me but I still don’t feel like a school-age kids parent.

When I taught 8th grade, I swear I had a parent conference with someone younger than me. I was 28 at the time. I thought the parents should be at least older than me to have a 14 year old.

I know what you mean about it seeming like you are the one still in school. Both of my boys are in school this year, and as if that wasn’t a big enough ordeal, I have an appointment with the principal tomorrow–not because I am in trouble, but because SHE is. How bizarre is this going to be? And, omg, am I one of THOSE parents that bitches out the principal because she messed up and made my kindergartener cry? Yes. Yes I am.

Since I had my kids pretty late I have a 3rd grader and a 2 YO and yet my friend from HS who got married at the perfectly reasonable age of 24 now has a son starting college. WTF. And yet, even though I get physically older mentally I remain 12 years old particularly with humor. All of the other parents seem to actually be adults, I feel like I’m pretending 1/2 the time.

Also no doctor of mine should be younger than me. It’s just not right.

Yes. YES. My daughter started kindergarten a few weeks ago. Yesterday, I went in to help out in the classroom, and I’ve never felt like a bigger imposter IN MY LIFE. I kept expecting someone to stop me and demand to examine the badge they gave me at the front desk, but apparently I look enough like a mom to pass without further questioning. Not sure how I feel about that.

I’m pretty sure the *principal* at my son’s school is probably younger than me. I decided this while attending my first PTA meeting the other night. His teacher, meanwhile, is straight out of college and just sweet, and I’m fine with that.

I thought you were going to say this woman was so young and new at the whole thing she tried to do a pap smear on the wrong hole.

Hah! No I hadn’t thought that your asshole may just be that irresistible. Come to think of it, now I’m feeling really insecure that mine is just so creepy/stinky/discolored/ungroomed( take your pick) that no OB/GYN has ever tried to poke me. Blah.

I’m a teenager too but today I am researching driving schools for my son so I’m not exactly sure how that worked. I’ll have to get back to you when I’ve figured it out.

Um yeah. I’ve never had that either! If I knew that was part of the pap smear procedure, I probably wouldn’t have one again!

I’ve only had the butt exam happen once with a new gyno. I actually screamed because she did it with no warning at all.

My people! I have found my people! All this time I thought there was something wrong with me, that I have a husband and a kid and a mortgage and a car payment, and yet I still feel about sixteen inside. Maybe 18, tops.

I had the exact same thoughts you’re describing–This is ME, filling out PAPERWORK, all MOM-LIKE and stuff? What the what?

It doesn’t help that every time I walk into my daughter’s cute little school I think, ‘I wouldn’t mind being this age again. Elementary school was good times.’ You couldn’t pay me to be a teenager again, but being a little kid again? I’d do that in a heartbeat.

Kids starting school in the same town you grew up in is extra creepy- same school you attended, same “kids” you graduated with all with their own offspring. It has been a total mind blow- just like high school but with children to compare, too!!

What what, in the butt?! I’ve never had a papsmear that ended with a finger in the butt…

I had the finger in the butt once at Planned Parenthood. They said they were checking for hemorrhoids or hernias or polyps or something. I did get a warning about it, but since the first time, it’s never happened again.

Also, to add to the list of people that shouldn’t be younger than you but oh my god they are…the vet.

When my now college sophomore (how did that happen, anyway?) was a freshman in high school I went to back to school night, and I was astonished to find that I was sitting in class listening to a bunch of “kids” who probably were born when I was in high school. Tonight is back to school night, I am pretty sure the teachers haven’t magically aged since last year, or the year before, or the year before…

The moment arrived for me when I read a newspaper story about a ‘brave grandmother’ who had walked for help after an accident – and then found out that she was younger than I. A grandmother! I had fully pictured the whole grey hair, cardigan, possibly carrying some mobile knitting project scenario. But then, my dad’s in his 80s and says he’s still 21 inside.

Tears are rolling right now! The only thing worse was the super hot gyno who was “filling in” for my pld grey haired doctor. Very hard not to hear cheesy porn music in my head while he was examining the nether regions!

Heh. Just had to laugh at the “What, what in the butt” comment. Yeah. What she said!

And yes, and yes on it all. Young doctors are SO STRANGE to me. Especially a physician’s assistant who is 23. Good lord. I work for the same company in HR, so I could “peek” at her age. 23. WHOAH.

Yeah, I’ve never gotten that “backdoor” probe except when they check for whatever the hell bacteria it is they check for a few weeks before you’re supposed to give birth. It’s certainly not part of a standard pelvic in my doctor’s office. THANK GOD!

God I love you. I so could’ve written this. (And, P.S., I’m a 33 year old RN who is starting to see doctors that are younger than me. Oh GAWD!)

After a similarly surprising and uncomfortable moment with my substantially older-than-me OB/GYN (she warns me everything else is coming, but decides a finger up the butt is better left unmentioned?!) . . . I’ve come to believe that some situations are equally hard to handle regardless of our compartative age.

But then I do feel bad for the eye doctor I mistook for the secretary because he looked 12. I suppose these things cut both ways.

I’ve had the whole back door probe done during an annual exam before too. It was a surprise as she didn’t give me any notice. I felt like a dog when the vet sticks the thermometer up their butt and they look behind them and clench becaue they had no idea what was going to happen. I too had no idea why she did it….Maybe my asshole is irresistible too! :ob

I have had the bi-manual exam and if you have a history of endometriosis it’s commonplace to do that. I hate it. My GYN was too freaking hot for me, so I switched to a woman. Couldn’t deal with wetting my panties on the table because he was so sexy. I am not kidding.

Oh my god – you are too, too funny!

I am in the camp of never having THAT done during a pap, I thought they only did that to guys? I’d get my money back.

I hear ya. And I have no idea who the grocery baggers are talking to when they say, “ma’am.” Seriously freaks me out. (BTW, I’m the lurker who passed you and your hubby hiking on Tiger Mountain. As you FLEW past me, that is. Rocket speed. No sweat. I witnessed it.) :)

Is this reverse ageism? Lol. Have had some excellent young people care for me and absolutely abhorrent older ones.
I had that anal swab once and they told me beforehand. E.coli/UTI check when I was pregnant, since having one could affect the pregnancy.
The nurse should tell you every procedure and you should always feel comfortable and confident in their competence. You should ask and they shouldn’t be ambiguous about it. This reminds me, There was a *17 yr old* impersonating a P.A. (of course, p.a.’s just need a Bachelor’s and two years P.A., can you tell I agree with this?) near Orlando and caught last week. Kudos to the H.R. who probably should have been snooping at him, and doing their job. Maybe too busy looking at other young PA’s ages. Instead, they gave him a badge. No word yet if he had any anal fixations.

Abnormal occult bleeding. That’s what the finger in the butt is. They then swipe their finger over a paper test strip, that will then show if there is blood in your stool.
This is a tip off for colon cancer, rectal cancer, etc etc.
So now you know, you aren’t THAT irresistible, lol!
And I still remember feeling intimidated by my kid’s principal, and teachers. Weird isn’t it?

I teach Kindergarten, and let me tell you, it is just as uncomfortable for us to be younger than our kids’ parents as it is for you to be older than your kids’ teachers. I always wonder if I’m actually being taken seriously (I DO know what I’m doing, after all), and when I call home about discipline issues, I feel like a tattling playmate. I never realized that we are all being intimidated BY EACH OTHER!! It kind of makes me feel better.

Let me tell you about being old. Being old is when the corpsman at the Naval Clinic is checking your kid’s vitals and announces that he “will be 20 on Friday.” What?! New rule: you must be at least old enough to drink in order to provide medical care to my kids. Damn whippersnappers! On the upside, our pediatrician in VA was referred to as “Dr. Good and Sexy.” Sometimes it is OK I suppose, you know, if you are into objectifying attractive young men. Which BTW, I totally am.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Totally get it, but here is a funny story: Just yesterday at work my boss (pharmacist-who looks 15 when he has gel in his hair, otherwise 13) was telling us that the PA’s who went to his school and had to learn the exam portion of the lower anatomies were taken to a different school where the prof there taught that portion of their class. Then for the practical (ready?) each student would give the professor an exam. Yes the prof got a vaginal/rectal exam from each student. One right after another where they would explain to the student what they were touching/feeling for…. I expect those profs have a little grey hair.