I have something like 18 months’ worth of video on our camcorder, mostly because 1) it’s a pain in the butt to get it onto my Mac and 2) I’m lazy, but I managed to pull a few recent clips and string them together into a too-long-for-Flickr movie featuring some revealing shots of our shamefully messy family room, the fact that Riley often runs around with no pants on, and one of the many scintillating lyrics in that well-loved singalong, “All the Babies Go to the Mine (Lowered in Buckets)”:



Random family goofiness from Linda Lee on Vimeo.

In other news, hot dogs are apparently off the list of things I can talk about at ParentDish along with every-fucking-thing else, sheesh; JB made me watch The Bucket List with him the other night and then he begged me not to tell the internet but HA HA HA my husband made me watch a pussy suck-ass Rob Reiner movie oh wait the joke’s on me; Dylan has been sleeping like a champ in his swing but not nearly so well in the crib and I don’t know, do you think there’s anything wrong with continuing to cram him in the Nature’s Touch Baby Papasan at night or are we just creating a maaaajor problem for ourselves?

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Melissa
Melissa
15 years ago

Molly slept in her swing for almost the first year of her life. We did have to Ferber her after moving her to the crib, but it worked like a charm and she shows no adverse swing effects. AND we got to sleep. A lot.

ellie
15 years ago

Sheesh, the whole hot dog thing is ridiculous – but take it for what it is. Luckily your kids will never have to interact with those little prudes in training.

Jen
Jen
15 years ago

Let sleeping babies lie…WHEREVER. Our toddler slept with us for a year and a half, then decided he was big enough for his own bed. We haven’t had any tearful dramas or mommy issues. Go with what works, as long as the swing can support his weight- stuff him in w/ duct tape if need be.

Don’t tell your loyal readers at ParentDish I said that.

clarabella
15 years ago

Gah, don’t let the parentdishers hear the “Baby in the Mine” song if they can’t take a little hot dog talk. That whole situation over there is quite ridiculous but I can’t say surprising.

Video=hilarious. I will be giggling about “my way or the highway” for quite a while, I promise.

Jen
Jen
15 years ago

PS, I am a techically challenged loser- how do you dub music onto your video w/o covering the sound of your adorable children?

mona
15 years ago

I read your ParentDish posts in my google reader and never venture to the site because of all the wackos and prudes. Yikes.

And I just love King Riley.

Blythe
15 years ago

Hey, why don’t you ask the ParentDish readers what they think about the swing? That sounds like fun.

Oh, I crack myself up. (Seriously, it must be exhausting to go through life without a sense of humor. Let’s hope we never find out for sure.)

I loved watching Riley hop off the couch and zoom across the house to meet you at the front door. Even if you’ve warped him with the hot dogs, he’s still cuter than cute.

Amanda
15 years ago

Both my kids slept in their bouncy seats until they were about 5-6 months old. My pediatrician was NOT a fan of it and eventually she scared me into laying the kids flat. Her argument was that if there was a fire, I would have to UN-STRAP said child before fleeing. So with my second baby, I just put the swing in the co-sleeper right next to my bed and tilted it back a little so she wouldn’t slide down if left unstrapped. Worked like a charm.

tash
15 years ago

Hilarious video – King Riley, the hebibota flying highway boy.

Loved it.

tash
15 years ago

and that hot dog shit made me fall off my chair!!!!!!!!!!! hahaahah

Lindsay
Lindsay
15 years ago

Your family is so cute!

Sleepynita
15 years ago

The prudes and know-it-alls at ParentDish NEVER fail to amaze me ….

Elizabeth
15 years ago

Jesus, those Parent Dish commenters are intense. If I’m not allowed to make dirty jokes around ma child I’m not sure what the hell my husband and I would actually talk about. Current events? Good god.
Anyhoo, I would leave Dylan wherever he’ll sleep for as long as he’ll sleep there – we blatantly exceeded the weight limit on the Pack and Play bassinet thingee for as long as we possible could.

Em
Em
15 years ago

Hilarious and adorable!
What’s the music you used on the video? It’s so catchy?

Jacqueline
15 years ago

I love the way it will lead to your children being ostracised on the playground. It is the adult ascribing the sexual overtones that is the problem, not the innocent child repeating the phrase. They have no idea it is about sex. It is the adults that corrupt the children. Especially those prude types.

serror
serror
15 years ago

HA! Hot Dogs! Oh, sad ParentDish prudes…

Love the Baby in the Mine song, as well. Sounds like many of our re-lyrics.

Also, love the song you used to edit the video to, can you share what it is?

JLS
JLS
15 years ago

HOLY SHIT! That lady w/the hotdog thing needs to get a grip! I’m not usually one to post, but WOW! I hate when people get personal and attack when they clearly know very little. I love the hotdog remark, and we do things like that too. It’s called being a fun wife, not a freak who thinks WAY too much about how she looks. Keepin’ it real! Nice.

Claire
15 years ago

That video is made of awesome!

Caitlin
Caitlin
15 years ago

Random: I love it when people pronounce measure like “MAYsure” and JB totally does (I say “MEHsure”). Your kids are so freaking cute! As is that yellow chair!

Jamie
Jamie
15 years ago

Just when I thought I would never stop laughing at the last line “and NO ONE surVIVVVVVVED,” you ended the video with Riley saying “I’m really, really high.”

And then I gasped for one last breath, pissed my pants in laughter, and slid right out of my desk chair. The end.

Lesley
Lesley
15 years ago

Q: What is the song on the video? I love that.

Riley’s “My Way or the Highway!” needs regular airing over at Parent Dish.

Why do the holier than thou fools read you anyway? Haven’t they heard of change the channel? They seem as inane as the Dooce haters who obsessively cringe at everything she does and says and yet continue to read her every day as if forced. I don’t get it.

Lesley
Lesley
15 years ago

Btw, I just tried Work Out with Jackie Warner video and barely made it out alive. It kicks ass and is worth the money IMO.

beach
beach
15 years ago

Gah…parent dish….seriously, karma is a bitch and those prudes are due to have some messed up kids….anyways, loved the happy family video….good to have, when they become teens and are driving you mad with their hijinx you can look back at the innocent baby toddler days….

susie
15 years ago

Looking back on my 2.5 year old’s baby days, I wonder why I was so freaking stressed about letting him sleep in the bouncy seat, the swing, etc. Now that I am pregnant with #2, I plan to let him/her sleep wherever he/she wants, whenever. It’s shocking to me when I remember phases we went through where we had a really solid routine, and then he grew out of it and everything changed. I bet swing sleeping is the same thing.

And although you are pretty much my favorite blogger, I actually took ParentDish off my reader last week because it raised my blood pressure so much. I’ll miss your posts… not much else though.

april
15 years ago

Too funny. A couple of the boards I read get all up in arms over the tiniest thing. Especially Happy Meals.

Kristi
15 years ago

screw ParentDish! All it ever does is piss me off – it’s worse than the evening news.

Let Dylan sleep wherever you will get the most sleep – that is the most important thing to remember! Wait until you have no other choice dude.

Also, I couldn’t even make it through The Bucket List.

regan
15 years ago

Your boys are too cute. Seriously, they make my ovaries hurt.

Colamum
Colamum
15 years ago

About the parentdish comments…what about the ones where people sided with you ? Not everyone who comments on your posts are attacking your personality…isnt that worth a mention too?
just my opinion…

Emily
Emily
15 years ago

My favorite part about jerks who make those kinds of comments is that they think they know everything. They think that the hot dog joke is such an intimate thing for you two to be sharing, and that you must not have anything else between the two of you to keep for yourselves. Heaven knows if anyone found out the cute name I call my boyfriend that our relationship would be over.

And of course, since you did it now, you’ll keep doing it even after he figures it out, or whatever bad shit is supposed to happen as a result. Whatever. People think they know what’s best for everyone else.

I think the person who said that Riley’s teeth are going to fall out because you’re too stupid to actually parent your child is the one that really got to me. Shut up, lady. Seriously.

Ellen
Ellen
15 years ago

Dude, your house looks like so much fun! That backrub bit was adorable.

Sundry
15 years ago

To those who asked, the song is “You Gotta Tap” by Audiobody. I should have included that info in the video itself, whoops.

tracy
15 years ago

The whole dentist thing??? Many insurances and dentists won’t even see your kid until they turn 3(unless of course it is necessary) Why has our world gotten so P.C. and why is there only one correct way? Life (last time I checked) wasn’t one size fits all, because believe me, if it was, I would be a whole lot richer!
Keep up the posts, you make me laugh

Maria
15 years ago

Man the comments on that post were mind-blowing. I want to blog about BJ’s RIGHT NOW.

That video was awesome.

sooboo
sooboo
15 years ago

Funny how some of the PD commenters thought that the hot dog joke will make Riley unpopular. When I was a kid, jokes and knowledge about such things kind of had the opposite effect on a kids popularity.

Becky
Becky
15 years ago

Reece slept in his Baby Papasan until he was like 7 or 8 months old….if it works…use it….

Swistle
15 years ago

What I want to know is: when Jack Nicholson crossed “kiss the most beautiful girl in the world” off his list—WHO CRIED?

justmouse
justmouse
15 years ago

omg. i am in love. with your whole FAMILY!!!

and that “high five, low five, slip me some skin” thing…OMG!!!! Alex and i have been doing something like that since he was 18 months old!!!! that’s so awesome!

as for cramming the baby into his swing thingy to sleep…ya, i think if you do that regularly, you’re seeing yourself up to have a child that will NOT go to sleep in his own bed. but i can totally understand how easy it is to just let them sleep wherever they can. in dylan’s case though, he’s still pretty young. i think once they hit over 18 months old…if they don’t have a “normal” routine, you’re gonna have a fight on your hands every night trying to get them to go to bed.

…again…in LOVE!

Aardvark
15 years ago

My pediatrician and ENT have recommended that Miss P sleep in her bouncy seat (or swing) because she is not suppose to sleep flat on her back. She has laryngomalacia and sleeping flat makes it harder for her to breathe. Many babies with reflux are happier sleeping in a swing, bouncer or car seat because the feel better somewhat inclined. SO really you are just doing it for his health ;)

Megan
Megan
15 years ago

The “my way or the highway!” part was great. I always say get ’em started on Roadhouse when they’re young. Seems to me when young Riley is school age, he’ll be the most popular kid on the playground with his hot dog stories and his James Dalton scissor kicks.

Stacy
15 years ago

I read the ParentDish stuff … whoa! A LOT of people really need to remove the stick. Ahem!
Sheesh!

Sleeping in the swing/papasan? Eh… not that I know a damn thing, really, but my hunch would be (assuming there is no reflux as Aardvark mentions) to keep TRYING the crib and when he wakes up or won’t sleep switch to the swing. At some point it comes down to the family needing to get sleep. Also? Make sure there isn’t anything uncomfortable about the crib, you know, a light in the hallway bothering him, rough sheets, scary looking mobile … does he roll over yet and sleep on his stomach? The secret thing is that babies sleep better on their stomachs but it isn’t totally safe until they can roll over and get themselves in that position. So, if he’s a rolling fiend (like my boy) then you could try putting him down on his stomach or helping him roll over when you put him down.
Just a thought …

Stacy
15 years ago

Also, what are you singing to the tune of The Wheels on the Bus?? Just curious, I could use some more verses… my dad used to make up bus-parts because the windows up and down? the blinker ? BO-ring.

Alicat
Alicat
15 years ago

God, parents really are nuts (referring to hotdogs, not the rest of your post).
Our son always slept in his crib, but was swaddled for every nap and bedtime until 17 months. People were horrified by this, but the kid slept like a dream, and my husband and I could teach courses in advanced swaddling. If Dylan sleeps in the swing, I’d say swing away!

Alicat
Alicat
15 years ago

wait, just read what I wrote and need to clarify, the parents who are freaking about about the hot dog references are nuts, not the parents who might make tbe periodic references to hot dogs (and nuts)…

Heather C
Heather C
15 years ago

Loved the part where Riley was a helicopter. When I babysat, I had a three year old boy (who is now 18, oh my god) who pronounced it “hopticopter”. Ambulance was “abliance”. I still pronounce them that way sometimes.

Also, thanks for letting me know about AudioBody. I find out about the best music through the internet.

ikate
ikate
15 years ago

Maybe you should ask the ParentDish readers what their thoughts are on keeping Dylan in his swing. I’m sure they would have lots to say on the subject!

And, I bow down to King Riley…

Lisa S.
Lisa S.
15 years ago

Well! I bow to the awesome superiority of those ParentDish commenters. I can barely type well whilst sitting on my tuchis and using both hands on the keyboard. How do those women — tapping bravely with one finger whilst their rest of their digits are engaged in pearl-clutching, standing carefully lest they perforate their colons on the giant sticks rammed up their posteriors — manage? Would that they’d blog and share the secrets of their superiority with the rest of us poor heathens!

Mandy
Mandy
15 years ago

So, what is the story with Parent Dish? I mean, who are those people and is their purpose in life just to be weird and snippy?? I ventured over there via the link above and…my god…NEVER AGAIN.

jac
jac
15 years ago

I can’t believe the hot dogs got them going, but the stoned insect didn’t. It would always be something. You could say you punted a child clear to the second hole using a 4-iron, and some fucknuckle would point out that a driver has less lead paint.

And I’m going to need the full lyrics for “All the Babies Go to the Mine”. Research, you understand.

diane
diane
15 years ago

I can’t believe how sweet and adorable that video is. My grandchildren are 4 and 5 years old and I so miss that younger stage of discovery and the sheer joy of performing. Please give us more.

Jean
Jean
15 years ago

I can’t bring myself to post at parentdish, but wanted to tell you that both my and my husband’s dentist told us to not even bother bringing our toddler in until she’s at least 3, and even then, they often don’t really do anything but take a quick look inside the pie-hole to make sure nothing is black and crumbly.